


Life Tells Us (Destiny Always Lies)

by Myuwnim



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Alpha Choi Seungcheol | S.Coups, Alpha Jeon Wonwoo, Alpha Kim Mingyu, Alpha Kwon Soonyoung | Hoshi, Alpha Yoon Jeonghan, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Beta Boo Seungkwan, Beta Chwe Hansol | Vernon, Beta Lee Seokmin | DK, Blood and Violence, Cock Warming, Deception, Dubious Consent, F/M, Foursome - F/M/M/M, Knotting, M/M, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Minor Character Death, Multi, Obsessive Behavior, Omega Hong Jisoo | Joshua, Omega Lee Chan | Dino, Omega Lee Jihoon | Woozi, Omega Verse, Omega Wen Jun Hui | Jun, Omega Xu Ming Hao | The8, Oral Sex, Overstimulation, Past Violence, Polyamorous Pack, Polyamory, Rape/Non-con Elements, Threesome - F/M/M, oh my lord how to tag, please understand, reader is a beta, would tag more but spoilers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-24
Updated: 2020-06-10
Packaged: 2021-03-01 18:40:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 10
Words: 46,911
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23821705
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Myuwnim/pseuds/Myuwnim
Summary: You weren’t exactly someone with a high rank being a beta and everything, neither was your job as an editor that much respected but your pack alpha is someone…. society may as well worship. A high ranked alpha, powerful and commending. You’re not even sure how you found yourself becoming part of the pack, memory hazy and head always pounding in protest whenever you try to remember.You sigh, there was really no point in exerting yourself any longer. Collapsing on your bed, you think back to the dark bruises on Jihoon’s cheeks, your own aching just from the thought. With one last huff, you bury your face in your pillow, willing all thoughts away and succumbing to sleep.
Relationships: Boo Seungkwan/Reader, Choi Seungcheol | S.Coups/Reader, Chwe Hansol | Vernon/Reader, Hong Jisoo | Joshua/Reader, Jeon Wonwoo/Reader, Kim Mingyu/Reader, Kwon Soonyoung | Hoshi/Reader, Lee Chan | Dino/Reader, Lee Jihoon | Woozi/Reader, Lee Seokmin | DK/Reader, SEVENTEEN Ensemble/Everyone, SEVENTEEN Ensemble/Reader, Wen Jun Hui | Jun/Reader, Xu Ming Hao | The8/Reader, Yoon Jeonghan/Reader
Comments: 52
Kudos: 249





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> please enjoy whatever my brain decided i have to write :")

_“Where did you find her?”_

_A pause, then a hesitant breath._

_“I- I don’t know.”_

_The voice this time is much softer than the previous; a nervous tilt in his voice and you could practically feel the anxiety creeping up his chest in your disoriented state. Your head pounds, something thick and sticky on the side of your face trickles down to your neck. A smell of iron engulfing your familiar scent of tea; replaced by the bitter smell of distress._

_“She’s hurt- b- by alphas. I couldn't leave her alone.”_

_The meek voice pipes up again and you feel something soft and cool on the side of your face. Your body flinches from the sensation, startled by the sudden feeling against your head but the slight movement jolts a pain worse than being burned alive. You whimper, grunting weakly and a weak whine leaves your lips when someone coos at you softly. They shush you, deft fingers gently massaging your neck and you flinch before relaxing, the stiffness in your neck gradually leaving from the gentle hand._

_“It’s alright, you’re safe now. Don’t worry.”_

_The voice this time is soft. The words filling your head and flooding your mind with warmth. Your eyes are too heavy to open but you manage a small nod and you hear the person give a satisfied hum, the wet cloth once again dabbing at the side of your head gently. Your neck is tended to by a different pair of hands, gently wiping at the area with light touches. The pain is burning but bearable; avoiding the area that stings the most. The one tending to your head speaks again, a finger caressing your cheeks lightly and his voice is gentle when he promises;_

_“You’re safe with us now.”_

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


“Noona! Wake up! Hyung’s hurt!” Chan huffs, finding it necessary to throw his weight on top of you. You gasp, coughing at the sudden pressure on your abdomen and a groan leaves your lips when seeing the source of your rude awakening looking at you with wide eyes and small pout. “You’re not waking up,” he states, pout more prominent and you laugh, maneuvering yourself so that Chan is pushed under you and this time crushed by your weight, being mindful to keep your blanket wrapped around yourself. 

“Next time, wake someone up _nicely_ and they’ll comply.” You grin, kissing away the pout from the youngest’s lips and he seemed distracted by the feel of your lips. You pull away and the young omega instinctively chases after you, not enough from the brief taste of your lips. He seems to snap out of it when you move away from him completely and out of the bed. “Who’s hurt, Channie? Is it Jun?”

The youngest shakes his head, pointing at the door where you can pick up the suffocating scent of burnt leaves. “It’s Jihoon-hyung. He fell from the stairs, I think.” Chan briefs, brows furrowing in worry when you freeze. “Noona?”

The momentary pause is replaced by a nervous laugh, you move to cup Chan’s face between your hands and deliver him another kiss. “I’m fine, I’m fine. I’m sorry. I was just surprised. Is he okay? He’s in the living room, right?” You splutter, words jumbled and breathed into one sentence as you grab a sweater to cover yourself. The piece of clothing belonging to Mingyu based on the size and the smell of leather engulfing you brings you momentary peace. “Come on, Channie.” You gently prob, the young omega instantly taking your hand and pulling you to where the smell of burnt leaves is stronger.

The sight in front of you is worrisome though familiar. Jihoon is surrounded by Seokmin, Soonyoung, and Junhui, with Joshua tending to the younger omega’s wounds. Jihoons lips are split; blood oozing from the small wound and the side of his face is forming a dark purple colour. You feel yourself hesitate when coming near him, the sight stirring an unpleasant feeling in your stomach and the smell of bitterness is stronger when in the same room. 

“Y/N? Baby, what’s wrong?” Soonyoung questions slowly, holding the side of your face with one hand while the other rubs your shoulder slowly in comforting motion. Your gaze is still directed at Jihoon wincing at the dab of alcohol pressed to his face— you can’t bring yourself to look away. “Hey, hey, it’s okay, pup,” Soonyoung shifts his body to cover your line of sight and your vision is only filled with him. “You don’t have to look. We just wanted your scent here to help Jihoonie relax a bit.” 

You blink, looking at Soonyoung’s eyes to see crescent moons as he smiles at you. “No, I’m sorry- It’s fine. I want to look,” your hasty decision pulls a small frown on Soonyoung’s face and he holds your face with both hands this time to keep your gaze solely on him. 

“None of that now. Jihoon’s fine. He was just too tired to watch where he stepped earlier and missed a flight of stairs. He didn’t fall too far but his head hit the side of the railing. You know him, he’ll tough it out. He’s just annoyed because he was a bit clumsy. He’ll be fine.” The reassurance makes you relax a bit, though your stomach is still churning in unpleasant feelings. 

You can still hear the words exchanged between the small group behind the alpha currently holding you. Joshua softly advising Jihoon on how to further treat his wounds by himself and the bitter smell of burnt leaves is slowly fading and filled with the familiar sweetness of lemongrass. You peer over Soonyoung’s shoulder once he doesn't have his hold on your face anymore and a sense of relief floods your system when Seokmin seems to be scenting the wounded omega. 

You break away from Soonyoung when the alpha is no longer holding you and dart towards Jihoon. Your hands are clinging to his side in a hug and the omega huffs when you throw your weight on him as if disregarding the state of pain he’s in. “Not that I mind the attention, but please be mindful that I’m still very much wounded.” His tone is wry if anything else, as if reluctant to voice his complaints but Jihoon is holding you by the waist when you straddle his lap and begin rubbing your cheek on his neck. 

Seokmin is still rubbing his wrist against Jihoon, holding his arm softly and not minding your figure clinging to the older omega. The beta scent the two of you emit is distinct. Like all beta scents, the undertone of the smell is calming for distressed omegas and alphas alike. The betas mostly incharge to resolve conflict so their scents are always sought after when calming a distressed pack member. 

Though Jihoon is anything but distressed, tired from hectic schedules and the wound he inflicted in the state of his fatigue. Though the omega doesn’t complain when being scented by his two betas, the scents mixing well with one another in a sweet tangle of honeysuckle and tea. He feels his body relaxing, the fatigue no longer making his body tense and Jihoon rests his chin on your shoulder, eyes beginning to drop. 

“Alright, I think that’s enough excitement for today. Everyone should rest up. Seungcheol wants to hold a pack meeting tomorrow morning.” Joshua ushers, pushing Chan towards his room when the youngest member starts complaining about the unfairness. _Why am I the only one being pushed away?_ The youngest whines but instantly shuts when Joshua kisses him, a pout left on his lips when the lead omega pulls away. “Because you’re too young to stay awake this late. Come now, let's not bother Jihoon and let him rest.” Joshua is pulling Chan away to his room and the youngest seem to comply though the small pout is still present on his face. 

“Right. We’ll head to bed first,” Soonyoung agrees easily, walking up to your trio and pressing a kiss to the crown of your head. You hum at the sensation, face now buried in the crook of Jihoon’s neck. Soonyoung moves on to kiss the omega’s forehead, the younger pack member humming in content before the alpha finally moves to kiss Seokmin’s lips. “Make sure to take care of these two,” he murmurs between their lips and Seokmin kisses him again after nodding in response. 

Jun leaves with Soonyoung to head for the omega room after kissing the three of you goodbye. Jihoon is beginning to relax against the sofa, his weight further pushed against the cushions with you on top of him and Seokmin is sitting on the floor by his legs. The male beta is rubbing Jihoon’s knees softly as you begin kissing the scent glands on the omega’s neck. 

The comfortable silence is broken by your small whine, hips jolting slightly in your spot on Jihoon’s lap. You sigh, murmuring an apology and Jihoon is blinking to keep himself awake. His eyes are locked on Seokmin who’s also looking at him with slightly wide eyes. The two hold each other’s gazes until you whine again, hips shifting to find a comfortable position, somehow restless on the omega’s lap. 

“Y/N, are you alright?” Seokmin is the one who breaks the silence, voice soft and questioning as he sits up on his knees to reach you better, running his hand along your hair in comforting motions. He exchanges glances with Jihoon again when you shake your head, face still hidden but a small sniffle makes the two more alert. 

“What’s wrong, baby? You can tell us,” Jihoon is murmuring softly, shifting so that he can look at your face better. You’re a lot more stubborn on that, not wanting to be seen and insistent in hiding your face. Something seems to click in the omega’s head and realization dawns on him. A small chuckle leaves his lips and Jihoon is rubbing your back softly. “Is it because I got hurt? I’m fine, now. Shua-hyung already treated me, remember? It doesn’t even hurt anymore.” He reassures but you huff against his neck. 

His reassurance seems to have upset your further, your normally calm and poised demeanor replaced with an annoyed scowl on your face when you finally pull away from him. “You got hurt. _That’s_ not something to take light of,” you insist, brows furrowing but your gaze isn’t directed at him. “You could have been scarred, Jihoon. Then what? It’s not something you should dismiss lightly and—”

Your back is pulled against strong chest, Seokmin’s hands worming around your torso to pull you towards him though not lifting you from Jihoon’s lap. “Shh, it’s okay. You don’t have to get upset. See? Hyung’s _really_ fine. Shua-hyung told us it’s actually a lot lighter than it looks. And besides, Jihoon-hyung just bruises a lot more than the average person. He’s tough so there’s nothing to get worked up over,” Seokmin is peppering soft kisses to your face at this, kissing whatever part he could reach with your back to him and you relax against his hold. 

Jihoon steadies you with his hand on your hips, sinking further against the couch as he looks up at you with a raised brow, as if challenging you to reprimand him further. You shy away from his gaze, leaning back further against Seokmin’s chest as the other beta sucks a mark against your neck in an attempt of comfort. 

“I’m sorry, Jihoonie,” you whisper, leaning down to press your lips against his in silent apology. He accepts the gesture, tangling his hand at the back of your head to keep your lips locked together. His other hand is caressing your thigh lightly, inching up to your side in soft touches. Your body is jolting with soft electricity from the silky touches as Seokmin sucks harder against your skin, insistent on leaving a mark. 

Your lips are being devoured by the omega, biting on your bottom lip harshly before licking in silent apology. You break away for a breath of air before Jihoon is once again pulling you back in thralls of passion. His tongue pries your mouth open and you accept, welcoming him into your mouth. A moan leaves the omega’s lips when you suck on his tongue, panting into his mouth when you break away for another breath, a string of saliva attaching you to his lips. 

A distinct hardness is beginning to make itself known under you, Jihoon groaning when you grind down on him. “Fuck, baby, don’t do that.” He pants, kissing your jaw and you move to kiss his lips again. 

Seokmin’s hands are running along your front, cupping your breasts in his large hands and you moan into Jihoon’s mouth when Seokmin’s thumb rubs your nipples through the layers of clothing. The beta groans, kissing your ear and taking the lobe into his mouth to suck harshly. “You’re not wearing a bra? Did you plan this, darling?” He chuckles, voice warm and deep in your ears when he presses another kiss to the back of your ears. 

You whimper softly, Jihoon kissing down your jaw to your neck and you blink through the haze to answer, voice strained against the whine in your throat. “W- was sleeping. Didn’t need one.” You managed, heart pounding against your ribcage when Jihoon tugs your hips to grind harshly against his erection. 

Your mind is drowned in the intoxicating scent of lemongrass and honeysuckle. The scent tangling in a sweet poison in the air, muddling your head and senses. Your mind is telling you nothing but _yes, yes, fill me, make me yours_ , as your body craves nothing but the touches of your two pack mates. 

Despite being a beta, your instincts are telling you to be claimed, pheromones released in the air similar to that of an omega in heat. The cause mostly being that a beta would fulfil the role of any lacking sub-genders in a single pack. It was not as if your pack lacks omegas- in fact the ratio of alphas and omegas in your pack are equal with a lacking number of betas. It was mostly due to the fact that the omegas in the pack have synched heats. If not going into heat at the same time then it will happen in a close time span when one omega is in heat it will soon trigger the other omegas’ heats. 

The last heat cycle happened two months ago and your pack is in silent need of intercourse. Although heats are not necessary to initiate sex, beta’s scent can trigger the instinct to secure a pack’s security and sex drive with their scent and with two betas in the room, the drive to have sex is higher than normal. It’s an alluring scent and the calmness it has also brings a sense of security to initiate intimacy without the fear of disrupting the pack’s function. 

Now, the burning sense of arousal sits in your belly and you claw at Jihoon’s shirt to take the article of clothing off. He chuckles, unbuttoning his collar though he doesn’t make a move to unbutton further. You whine at the smirk he gives you, huffing and grabbing hold the front of his shirt to pull him into another kiss. 

Seokmin’s hands slip under the sweater you’re wearing, slowly dragging the soft cotton up as his fingers drag against your skin and you shiver. You break away from your kiss with Jihoon so Seokmin can take your clothes off, satisfied to find that you only have your underwear on. “Cute,” he murmurs, kissing your cheek and you blush. 

“Th- they’re from a sale I saw last week,” you explain, slightly embarrassed when realizing the cotton striped underwear you’re wearing with a small bow on the center of the waistband. Your embarrassment earns a laugh from the two males and you feel all the blood rushing to your face.

“They’re cute, baby.” Seokmin reassures, kissing your shoulder as his hands wrap around your torso to massage your breasts. You moan at the sensation, a small hiss leaving your lips when the beta tugs at your nipples, the nubs instantly becoming erect from his touches. “You want to ride Jihoon-hyung, baby? Is that it?” You whine at the thought, grinding harder against the rough material of Jihoon’s jeans and the omega keens, whining at the sensation. 

Seokmin is tugging your nipples harder, cupping your breasts in his large hands as he sucks another mark into your neck. “You want to be filled? Have hyung's cock fill you up? You’ll look so beautiful- riding him and getting stuffed. Our baby writhing in pleasure,” the beta groans at the visualization, imagining your moans and the omega’s whine at being pleasured. 

“Yes, yes, _please_. Want it. W- want-” a broken moan leaves your lips when Seokmin’s fingers rub against your covered crotch, fingers pressing roughly against the light material to bring you pleasure. His thumb teases the waistband of your underwear, teasingly pulling the material from your skin before snapping them against you once letting go. You gasp, breath hitching at the sensation and your underwear is thoroughly soaked, leaking onto Jihoon’s jeans. 

The male beta licks at the markings on your neck, kissing the mark he left and being mindful of the pack bite the pack Leader left at the back of your neck. His fingers snake into your underwear, teasing your clit and with a soft kiss to the back of your ears, he pushes a finger into your heat. You moan at the sensation. Body trembling and breathing becoming laboured. The reaction spurs Seokmin further, adding a second finger and steadily pumping in and out. 

The coil in your stomach tightens and spreads; the desire to be filled so strong you rock against Seokmin’s hand. He shushes your whines, adding a third finger and you keen, tears springing to your eyes at the sensation. “Please, more. G- give me more,” you beg helplessly, body craving for a bigger sensation. Seokmin’s thumb rubs against your clit as his fingers piston in and out of you, drawing out a loud moan from your lips. 

Jihoon whines at the lack of attention on him and you blink away the haze to look down. He’s weakly bucking his hips up, crotch situated between your ass as Seokmin’s fingers continue to pry you open. You lean forward, holding Jihoon’s face between your hands, mindful of the bruise on his face as you begin kissing him again. Seokmin speeds up his ministrations at your distraction. Your moans are drowned by Jihoon’s lips.

The heat in your belly spreads, thighs jolting at the sensation of pleasure when the beta behind you sucks another mark on your neck. The fingers inside you are rubbing your walls so deliciously, your insides greedily sucking him in and clenching down harder as if not wanting the long, thick intrusion to leave. A strangled moan stucks at your throat when your orgasm is suddenly ripped from you, body jolting at the sudden emptiness when Seokmin suddenly pulls away and you feel like crying.

“Fuck, Minnie, _please_ . I was _so_ close,” you hiss, frustration making itself known in the form of tears as you look behind you. Jihoon is kissing up your jaw comfortingly but you can’t focus on anything else aside from the teasing smile Seokmin offers over your shoulder. 

He pulls you by your torso, this time off of Jihoon’s legs and the omega blinks at the loss of your weight. He looks quite pissed by the action but Seokmin is grinning at him with a glint in his eyes. “Spread your legs, hyung.” The beta commands and Jihoon does so without question, blinking curiously as Seokmin kneels in front of you. “You’re so wet,” the beta mutters, forcing you to stand in front of him on shaky legs as his hands hook around the waistband of your underwear. 

Seokmin kisses your stomach moving down along with his hands tugging down the last piece of clothing on you. His mouth is instantly on your clit, hands coming up to support your weight and you lean forward to get more friction. You mewl, blood rushing to your head as Seokmin’s tongue abuses your heat. Dragging deep against your walls and his nose bumps against your clit making you lurch forward. Your previous denied orgasm instantly comes back. Grinding down on the beta’s tongue and suffocating him with your arousal. The male doesn’t seem to mind, instead his arm hooks around your legs to pull you further into him as he tastes every single ounce you could offer. 

You come right then, the intensity of the orgasm rippling through your body in harsh waves and Seokmin greedily drinks every drop, not letting go until you give a small whine from the overstimulation. With one last kiss to the underside of your stomach, he pulls away, standing up to catch your boneless figure. The beta’s attention is directed back to the omega still on the couch, now palming himself lazily as he watches the show displayed. Cock already out of its confines and oozing a steady trickle of precum. Seokmin groans at the sight. 

“You think you can cum one more time, love?” He murmurs against your ear, shuffling you closer to Jihoon. Your head is still spinning from the intense orgasm, emitting a soft pheromone that proves your satisfaction. Seokmin is still holding you upright, his strong arms gentle when handling your tired body and you blink a couple of times to focus and answer his question.

You shake your head lightly, looking at Jihoon who’s beginning to stroke his aching cock and something in you churns at the sight; heat rising in your belly again. “Too sensitive,” you whisper, staring distractedly at the precum trickling the side of Jihoon’s dick. You think you’re beginning to drool a little. “You can use my mouth.” Your offer earns a groan from both males in the room. Seokmin murmuring praises against the side of your head as he slowly lays you on the ground in front of the omega.

Sinking down on the ground, you shuffle forward between the omega’s legs, hands situating themselves on Jihoon’s thighs and you make brief eye contact before wrapping your lips around the head. Jihoon groans at the sensation, head sinking deeper into the cushions as you bob your head as if to test your limits. It wasn’t the first time taking dick into your mouth, but the haze in your head is still clouding your judgement on how far exactly you can take this time. It wasn’t a small amount.

Soon enough, your nose is pressed to well groomed hair at the base and Jihoon struggles to hold back a moan rising in his throat. Your throat is tight and warm, drool dribbling the sides of your lips as you suck and Jihoon keens. His fingers tangle in your hair, not really doing anything aside from holding on to whatever sanity he has left. You pull back, lips tight around the head of Jihoon’s cock, licking his slit and tasting the sweetness of precum on your tongue. You start bobbing your head faster, borderline desperate to bring the omega over the edge. 

Whines and pants leave the omega’s lips, hands tightening in your hair and it’s slightly painful but you’re determined to make him come. Your hand comes up to squeeze the underside of Jihoons cock as you focus on his head; fingers twisting and turning harshly in delicious pressure. Your mouth sucks harder and Jihoon breaks when you cup his balls, coming with a loud cry and emptying himself into your mouth. You take him deeper once feeling the first spurts of cum, pressing down the urge to gag as Jihoon wriths violently under you. 

He pants tiredly, whining when you slowly pull away and kiss the head of his cock, squirming to get away from the overstimulation. You both collapse against each other on the couch, the omega cuddling closer to you when you lay next to him. Seokmin had left the room when nearing Jihoon’s orgasm to get supplies to clean up. He returns to the sight of you cuddling together with the spent omega. A small laugh leaves his lips as he wipes the sweat from both of your faces, dressing you once again in Mingyu’s sweater and replacing Jihoon’s ruined jeans to a more comfortable sweatpants. 

The male beta tugs a new pair of underwear up your thighs and you give him a playful kick in which the other beta bites your thigh in return, smiling brightly when you squeal in surprise. Once clean and redressed, you return to cuddling Jihoon. The omega seems to be in a pre-nesting state; not as intense as the urge to nest itself but desiring to be close to all things familiar surrounding him. So Jihoon pulls you closer to him, appreciating the scent of Mingyu on you and also taking in your own scent. He looks at the male beta who enters the room after throwing the dirty clothes into the laundry room and reaches out to him. 

The beta blinks but complies with the silent request, allowing himself to be pulled to the omega’s other side to begin cuddling. Soon enough, due to a blissful orgasm and a tired day, the omega is instantly asleep, head tucked under Seokmin’s neck. The two betas share a look, slowly maneuvering themselves from the other’s clutches. Seokmin carries him to the omega room and you follow along, tucking Jihoon in his own bed and being mindful of Jun and Joshua who’s already asleep on Joshua’s bed, cuddling together. 

You rub your wrist against Jihoon’s to get your scent on him, not wanting the sleeping omega to fuss when the two of you leave. Once the task is over (Seokmin shuts the door behind him with a soft click) you breathe a small sigh, legs slightly stiff but you wrap your arm around Seokmin’s neck once the man turns around to look at you. 

“You were being awfully mean to me earlier,” you tease, booping your nose against the other softly. Seokmin laughs, wrapping his arms around your waist and lifting you up to walk towards his own room, your legs dangling as you cling to his neck so as to not fall. 

“You liked it, didn’t you?” The other shoots back, kissing your lips in return. You don’t say anything else, rolling your eyes and breaking away from him when reaching the beta room. You don’t share a room with the other betas because despite your sub-gender being the same, your pack leader and lead omega thought it would be better if you had your own room since you were still a woman after all and you needed your privacy. 

“I’ll see you tomorrow,” you leave after one last kiss and head back to your room. 

The apartment you live in is spacious; fitting to accommodate a pack consisting of fourteen people. The bedrooms are shared depending on sub-genders (sans your own private room) into three main rooms. Each room is designed specifically to fit the sub-genders’ needs and spacious enough to make sure each person could have their own bed. The bedrooms are on the second floor of the apartment, living space and kitchen all placed on the first. The apartment itself is designed for high ranking sub-genders or someone very respected in society. 

You weren’t exactly someone with a high rank being a beta and everything, neither was your job as an editor that much respected but your pack alpha is someone…. society may as well worship. A high ranked alpha, powerful and commending. You’re not even sure how you found yourself becoming part of the pack, memory hazy and head always pounding in protest whenever you try to remember. 

You sigh, there was really no point in exerting yourself any longer. Collapsing on your bed, you think back to the dark bruises on Jihoon’s cheeks, your own aching just from the thought. With one last huff, you bury your face in your pillow, willing all thoughts away and succumbing to sleep. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello hello!! tis’ your local writer that has no clue what i'm doing ( ꒦ິ꒳꒦ີ) it’s a first time for me to be writing for svt!! i love them a whole bunch and wanted to indulge myself somehow o(இㅿஇ‸)o 
> 
> this chapter may seem awkward since it’s also a first time for me to be writing smut haha... that’swhyit’ssocringy ( ˃ ⌑ ˂ഃ )
> 
> it’s also a first for me to be writing an omegaverse au so that’s interesting! ᔪ(°ᐤ°)ᔭ i’ll try to bring the best in future chapters after this! please be kind and patient with me, thank you! (｡>ㅅ<｡)


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Your throat closes up, mouth suddenly dry and you’re suddenly overcome by the sudden urge to cry. Your hands scramble to take hold of Seungcheol’s hands and the alpha instantly kneels in front of you to get closer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> r- reading and writing smut are two completely different things i-

You sit on Mingyu’s lap, teeth worrying on your bottom lip as the alpha draps an arm over your form. You’re still very much bottomless, the alpha having his hold on you had growled in satisfaction when seeing you wear nothing but his sweater on his task of waking you up. He nibbles the skin between your neck and shoulder harshly, sucking on the skin and you wake up with a gasp. 

The alpha had carried you like a sack of potatoes over his shoulders, not allowing any other article of clothing to be worn aside from the ones you had on when falling asleep; his sweater and panties. Your bottom is very much exposed on his quest down to the living room, face burning when hearing a drawn out whistle when passing by the beta room and you covered your face as if hiding whatever dignity you had left. 

Now you’re currently on Mingyu’s lap. The young alpha trapping you in his embrace and you don’t find the energy in you to protest; instead slumping back onto his lap. The sweater is quite large, the alpha himself preferring loose fitting clothes, so it works as a short dress, hiding your panties well enough though not the length of your legs. You clutch at the sweater paws and lightly hit Mingyu’s face with it when the overgrown puppy kisses a wet spot behind your ear. 

He laughs loudly in surprise, hands tightening around you and he turns you around to face him to attack you with an onslaught of affection. Your breathing is suffocated by Mingyu’s love; the young alpha kissing your mouth excitedly as his fingers pinch at your sides and you squeal, the sound muffled by Mingyu’s lips. You start hitting him lightly though firm enough to put up a fight and Mingyu breaths a laugh when pulling away. 

He bites your bottom lip roughly, sucking the skin into his mouth to ease the pain before pulling away; smiling against your lips. “I’ll accept that apology now,” his face scrunches, pressing another kiss to your lips before you could reply and you stare at him incredulously by his words despite the close proximity. 

Once the alpha pulls away, you’re still looking at him with furrowed brows, a frown tugging your lips. “Are you serious? Apologise for what?” You question, huffing when the alpha pulls you by the hips before slowly grinding you on his growing hardness. Your mouth gapes, feeling his erection becoming harder through his sweatpants and the thin layer of your panties. “Mingyu, you’re fucking kidding me,” you hiss, finding it becoming increasingly harder to breathe when the male starts bucking up into you. “The pack meeting will start soon.” 

Mingyu smiles mischievously, a slow drag of his hips upwards makes your breath hitch and he smirks in satisfaction. “What makes you think I woke you up so early for, babe? Meeting doesn’t start till eight.” The clock is still very much six past forty when you pay attention and you look back at Mingyu’s grinning face in disbelief. 

The horny bastard laughs silently, fingers playing with the waistband of your panties and he absentmindedly stares at your breasts covered by his sweater. You lean forward to hide your face in Mingyu’s neck, taking in his scent and your hips begin to reciprocate the alpha’s grinding; pressing yourself down harder against the hardness albeit a lot shyer than the alpha’s own ministrations. Mingyu groans in satisfaction, sucking on your ear and moving down to your neck. His hands come up to massage your breasts through the cotton clothing and you moan softly at the sensation. 

“I think it’s still too early to fuck right now,” the male starts and you snort, calling bullshit because Mingyu fucks with no concept of time but you keep the thought to yourself. He continues with a laugh, as if sensing your thoughts, “But I want to feel you around me. Just stay still and we don’t have to do anything. You’re still tired, right?” 

You nod, lifting yourself slightly so Mingyu can tug himself free of his confines. His cock is red and swollen. The tip leaking precum and you’re distracted by the sight, wondering exactly how long the male had been sporting a boner. His cock is an impressive size, like any other alpha though Mingyu’s own added height contributes to his size beautifully and it’s a slightly intimidating sight fully erect like this. 

“You’re not… going to knot me are you?” You question hesitantly, voice meek as you stare at the cock pressing against your stomach. Mingyu laughs at the question and you huff, looking at him in disdain though the alpha is still grinning at you.

“Maybe next time. Or later today. I just want to feel you right now.” He reassures, kissing you briefly before you pull away with a nod. He grins, lifting you up with a hand while the other tugs your panties to the side, lining himself against your heat as he helps you sink down. 

Mingyu is large. The stretch is almost unbearable since beta’s aren’t designed to take an alpha’s cock as well as an omega can but you’re used to the sensation. Taking in deep breaths as you slowly sink down on Mingyu’s cock inch by inch, the male groaning in satisfaction, whispering soft praises against your ear as you whine, pausing for a moment to catch your breath. You feel absolutely full, not even fully down but your walls are fluttering to accommodate the sudden stretch without preparation and you feel like cursing yourself for not thinking of such an important step. 

Mingyu is still softly praising you, peppering soft kisses to your face as he patiently waits for you to continue. His heart is pounding hard in his chest, body wanting nothing more than to pound into your tight heat and breed you full but he promised to take care of you and he intends to keep his words. “It’s okay, baby, just take your time. I know you can take me. You’re so good to me— _ fuck _ ,” he grunts, bottoming out when you push yourself further down, taking everything Mingyu is giving you.

Your breath is laboured, feeling stuffed full with the alpha’s cock. Your hands cling to Mingyu's neck, the alpha groaning and breathing praises into your ear. You whine, hips shifting and it makes the both of you moan. You don’t say anything as you hide yourself in Mingyu’s neck, the alpha slowly moving to find a comfortable position to lean back against the couch with you clinging to him. 

A satisfied sigh leaves your lips, pressing a kiss to Mingyu’s scent gland and he hums in appreciation. Your mind is beginning to cloud over in a haze, feeling nothing and everything at the same time. The feeling of Mingyu’s cock filling you sits heavy in your mind, the sensation of being utterly stuffed full makes you dizzy.

You stay like that for a while; unmoving and appreciating the feeling of fullness. Mingyu’s scent is one of a satisfied alpha and that itself makes you rumble in satisfaction, purring into his neck softly. You’re starting to become a little drowsy, still heavy with fatigue and your eyes are dropping when Mingyu smooths his large hand down your back in comforting motions. “You can sleep again if you want. I’ll wake you up when the meeting starts.” He promises, kissing the side of your head.

You whine softly in protests, burrowing your face further into his neck. “Wake me  _ before _ the meeting.” You demand and it makes Mingyu laugh, agreeing easily to your requests. You relax again, feeling satisfied and protected at the same time in his embrace. You’re beginning to drift again when you hear soft footsteps padding against the wooden floor and Mingyu perks up from his spot under you.

You don’t move, eyes still closed and still practically boneless in the alpha’s hold but you can hear Mingyu softly exchanging words with the new figure that has entered the living space quarters. A hand cards through your hair gently, patting down messy bedheads and you hum in satisfaction. The person behind you is no doubt another alpha of the pack; strong earthy smell mingling together with Mingyu’s leather scent. It takes you a moment to realise the new alpha is Wonwoo; the strong smell of juniper entering your mind though not overwhelming. 

He exchanges a few words with Mingyu, humming in satisfaction when the younger alpha shifts and it draws a moan from you. He says something else but you’re too deep into the feeling of fatigue to catch what he’s saying but Mingyu’s cock inside you twitches and it makes you jolt slightly. Wonwoo leans forward into you, his chest close to your back for you to feel his warmth though not pressing himself onto you. Your breath becomes increasingly laboured, face still in Mingyu’s neck but the distinct sound of kissing is clear in your ears.

Mingyu growls, lips smacking against the older alpha and he’s unintentionally bucking into your heat as if to keep himself grounded. Mingyu’s arms are tightening around you, coming around to grab Wonwoo by his shirt to keep the latter locked onto his lips. You’re starting to whimper, heat becoming sensitive as Mingyu grinds harder into you. Pulling away from Mingyu’s neck, your back is met with Wonwoo’s front and you’re trapped between the two alphas, watching them make out in front of you in a daze. 

Wonwoo’s kisses are gentle while Mingyu kisses like a starved man. The younger bites and licks, sucking skin harshly and licking in apology. Wonwoo is unfazed by the usual roughness, his hands placed on Mingyu’s knees to keep himself upright as he leans forward a bit more, effectively caging you in between two alphas. You’re starting to pant, whining pathetically when Mingyu tugs and pulls at you to thrust shallowly into your heat and Wonwoo is smirking into the kiss. 

Wonwoo’s hand snakes around your middle, slipping into your panties and rubbing your clit harshly as Mingyu starts biting his lower lip. You keen, lurching forward into Mingyu as if wanting to escape but Wonwoo pushes forward, growling into Mingyu’s lips. The younger alpha groans, momentarily breaking the kiss when you clench down harder on his cock, as if your walls are trying to suck him in deeper. Mingyu bucks up in desperation, wanting to feel you deeper and you’re sobbing into his shoulder, shaking your head and jolting in his lap. 

“W- wait, Gyu. T- too sensitive,” you whine, tears spilling down your cheeks and Mingyu blinks hard. His mind goes haywire, all the alarms going off when your scent is turning sour and he wills whatever self restraint he has left to stay still. Wonwoo pulls his hands from you slowly, face contorting in pain as if he’s physically hurt by your whimpers. 

“Shh, it’s okay, it’s okay. I’m sorry, love. Please don’t cry. You’re fine, I won’t do anything,” Mingyu peppers your face with kisses, cooing softly as he wipes the tears from your eyes. You’re still twitching on his lap and Mingyu frowns, gently taking hold of your hips to try and still you so you don’t move around his cock. “Do you want to get off?” He asks gently and you nod. Mingyu maneuvers himself so he’s laying you down on the couch, your hands wrapped loosely around his neck as he pulls out slowly so as to not further hurt you. 

You wince at the sudden emptiness, frowning slightly. Mingyu is still kissing your face once he pulls all the way out. “Want me to get Jisoo-hyung?” He offers, kissing your lips softly as to ease the frown on your face. 

You shake your head slowly, loosening your hold on his neck so he can move away. Mingyu fixes your appearance the best he could, readjusting your panties back into place and tugging on the hem of his sweater to cover you better. He places another kiss against your cheeks before standing up, tucking himself in and turning to Wonwoo who’s still looking at you with an observing gaze. “I’ll go make breakfast.” The younger alpha mutters, not waiting for a reply as he bounds to the kitchen but it makes you feel guilty when he leaves the room. 

You sit up as if wanting to reach out to the young alpha but Wonwoo is gently pushing you back down. “No, just stay down. He’s fine, he just needs to distract himself right now. You’re alright, that’s all that matters.” Despite the comforting words, you feel anything but ease and a choked whine bubbles up your throat to voice your distress at being left by the younger alpha. 

Your body is burning up, a thin sheen of sweat forming on the crease of your brow as you attempt to sit up hastily. Wonwoo quickly grabs hold of you, pulling you into his lap and you cling to him desperately, rubbing your cheek on his neck to get his scent on you. Your eyes are starting to sting a little with unshed tears and you blink, unsure why you’re suddenly experiencing a roller coaster of emotions. “What’s wrong with me, Wonu? I don’t…” you trail, unsure how to voice your complaints when you don’t understand what’s the problem. You shake your head, looking at Wonwoo with wide eyes, “Do you think I hurt his feelings? I also wanted it too but for me to complain is…” 

The alpha furrows his brow, rubbing an assuring hand behind your shoulder. He answers slowly, as if confused why you would ask such a question. “I’m sure… you know this isn’t just about sex,” he starts and you bristle, livid by his choice of wording but Wonwoo grins at your expression, continuing before you could argue. “We’re a pack. Every member’s comfort is top priority and so is yours. I’m sure Mingyu’s more bothered with the thought of hurting you than not getting off.” 

Wonwoo’s caressing your head now, letting you find a comfortable position on his lap as you listen to his explanation. “Don’t worry, Y/N,” he drawls, voice dropping into a faint growl as his hands tightens around your waist just a little bit. The sound startled you, instincts telling you to stay alert but the familiar scent of Wonwoo gives you comfort and your body relaxes again. He continues, sighing into your hair and rubbing his nose along your neck. “We won’t let anything happen to you. You’re safe with us.” The male finishes with a kiss to your scent glands.

A blissed sigh leaves your lips, maneuvering yourself to sit better on Wonwoo’s legs, your back to his front and relaxing into his touches. Wonwoo’s chest rumbles softly as he purrs to you, the sound meant to comfort a distress pack member and it’s working; your body no longer stiffening. 

Though your instincts are in a state of comfort, you can’t help your mind worry. Thoughts going through the various feelings you've felt for the past week seemingly conjured into a span of five minutes that morning. Worry, guilt, restlessness; the emotions putting you on edge and you recall not being able to sleep well at night either without a certain thought worrying you. You’re deep in your thoughts when suddenly a strong presence enters the room. A storm creeping in the air with sparks of static electricity and fierce rumbles of thunder.

You shiver, leaning back further into Wonwoo but the beta in you snaps you from your worries once realising the new presence to be your Leading Alpha. Seungcheol enters the room with bleary eyes, hands balled into fists to rub the sleep away and you laugh a little once noticing the bedhead. Your fierce pack leader is pouting while trying to stay awake. Very intimidating. 

He notices your amusement and throws a glare at you though it comes in the form of a scrunched up nose and pouty lips before he’s sighing and turning away. You giggle along with Wonwoo, feeling the urge to gossip loudly about the pack alpha’s appearance but you’re feeling generous so you don't say anything. 

Wonwoo’s hands are caressing your stomach lightly under the sweater, the couch pillow thrown over your legs to save dignity. Seungcheol looks back at you when Seungkwan and Vernon enter the room with sleep still present on their faces, trudging to the empty couch besides you and planting face first into the cushions; the two betas shoving and laying on one another to fit on the single couch. 

You watch on with amusement, throwing a pillow at them and the younger ones whine in protest once taking the assault and Seungkwan throws a pillow back at you before turning his head and burrowing himself into Hansol’s side. Seungcheol confiscates the fluff before you can throw it back and he hits you lightly with the weapon in his hands before turning to Wonwoo. “Where’s Mingyu? He’s not in the bedroom.”

Shrinking, you suddenly find a piece of yarn on your sweater much interesting, tugging lightly so as to not damage the clothes. Seungcheol watches your behaviour but he doesn’t get to ask before Wonwoo is waving at the kitchen area. “He left to make breakfast.” The younger alpha provides and you nod as if conforming he’s words.

It’s silent again after that. You could feel the lead alpha’s eyes on you and you shrink further into Wonwoo if that was even possible. “Hey,” Seungcheol breathes softly, taking your cheek in his hand so you’ll look up at him. His brows are furrowed and lips forming a small frown. “You okay? You’re turning sour.” Seungcheol’s hands are big and warm, thumb swiping the skin under your eyes as he waits for a reply.

Your throat closes up, mouth suddenly dry and you’re suddenly overcome by the sudden urge to cry. Your hands scramble to take hold of Seungcheol’s hands and the alpha instantly kneels in front of you to get closer. You’re shaking your head, throat hurting and not allowing you to speak. Under you, Wonwoo is tensing up and the two betas on the other couch lift their heads to look at you with concern. 

Your hands are pointing to your chest, not sure what to say but you feel like you should tell your alpha, your  _ leader _ that your chest is beginning to hurt. The heavy thumps of someone running faintly draws your attention and you break eye contact with your leader to see Jeonghan entering the room in short breaths, likely from running down the stairs. He takes one look at your face and instantly coos, taking quick strides and lifting you from Wonwoo’s lap. 

Jeonghan secures your legs around his waist, hugging you tightly to himself as you take in his scent. The urge to cry is still there, your vision blurry but you’re not crying. You blink, brows furrowing and blinking again but no tears are dropped and your eyes remain blurred. “What’s wrong? Are you stressed? Is there something you don’t like about your surroundings? It’s okay, baby, you can tell us. We’ll fix it.” The alpha promises, rubbing your back in comforting motions.

Seungcheol takes a step closer to you, kissing the pack mark behind your neck and the effect is instant. Your body relaxes, soothing pheromones released from the area of the bite as your pack leader continues to soothe you. A pack mark is distributed by the Leader of the pack as a sign the person belongs to a particular pack the alpha leads. The mark not only as a sign of belonging but also as a method of comfort the lead alpha provides to a distressed pack member.

The comfort your lead alpha is providing you makes you relax, the hurt in your chest washed away and instead replaced by fatigue. You feel awfully tired all of a sudden, slumping slightly in Jeonghan’s hold. “Take her to Shua. He’ll take care of her and let her rest.” Seungcheol commands though the tone is light and Jeonghan nods, turning around to take you to the omega room. 

You lift your head, looking at Jeonghan then turning to Seungcheol before the alpha holding you can take you away. “But the meeting,” you start and the question dies in your throat when Seungcheol shakes his head, waving at you in dismissal and you’re out of the living room before you could protest.

“It’s alright. We’ll tell you the details later. It’s better for you to rest up so the younger ones don’t worry.” Jeonghan assures, slowly walking up the stairs so he doesn’t jostle you in his hold.

Minghao is at the top of the stairs, staring at you in Jeonghan’s arms looking as if you had been crushed by the weight of the world. He doesn’t ask anything until the alpha carrying you is closer to him and the omega reaches out a hand to ruffle your hair gently. “Is she okay?” The omega sniffs, nose scrunching at the sour smell in the air but it’s faint so he knows not to worry too much.

“Not sure. Shua’ll take care of her so just go down and start scenting things. I think Hansol’s holding Seungkwan back from abandoning all reasons and coming here,” the alpha chuckles and Minghao nods, kissing the side of your head before quickly moving down. 

Jeonghan makes it to the omega room and is pleased when finding the lead omega still busy folding blankets. Joshua’s head snaps to the door when the faint smell of distress enters and he’s abandoning the sheets in favor of taking you into his arms. “Oh, baby, what’s wrong?” He places a hand on your neck and tilts your head back slightly. “Your scent glands aren’t swollen. You don’t have a fever,” Joshua is mumbling, feeling the spot behind your ears as he moves you to lie on his bed in the far corner. 

“Not sick. She was on the verge of a panic attack,” Jeonghan provides and Joshua’s mouth gapes slightly. His attention is drawn back to you when you whimper, tugging at his sleeve and the man obediently starts caressing your head. You hum, rolling over to press your face on Joshua’s pillows and taking in the sweet scent of floral water lilies.

The omega is still concerned, worrying on his bottom lip as he looks back at Jeonghan. “Did you take her to Seokmin?” Joshua asks softly, frowning when the alpha shakes his head in return. The omega looks back at you practically melting on his bed, the frown still present on his face. “I’ll take care of her for the time being. You should go downstairs. Cheolie’s probably waiting for you.”

Jeonghan frowns, not wanting to leave but he finds no point in arguing with the oldest omega. The alpha sighs, and you shift to look at him through hazy eyes. Jeonghan kisses Joshua’s forehead, murmuring something to him and the omega nods. Jeonghan notices your stare and offers you a sweet smile before he leaves the room after pressing a kiss to your hair.

“Alright, baby, let’s see what’s wrong,” Joshua mumbles, hands slowly moving your body to sit up as he stacks a bunch of pillows behind you. Your eyes are still closed, pliant in Joshua’s hands and letting him move you around like a doll. 

He leaves the bed for a moment but you don’t find it in you to be curious where he’s gone. Your arm is covering your eyes from the dim lighting in the room, as if any amount of light can burn your eyesight. Joshua returns shortly, taking a seat on the bed and he’s tugging the panties down your legs. You jolt, surprised and instinctively make a move to kick him but Joshua’s grabbing hold of your legs.

He sets your leg down when you look at him guiltily, offering you a sweet smile whilst discarding your underwear. Your curiosity of what Joshua is doing is answered when the older male slides your legs into a pair of boxers, sliding them up your legs and tugging them around your waist to secure their place on your hips. 

“You’re panties were a bit wet so I thought you’d be more comfortable if I changed them,” he explains easily and you understand why he chose a pair of boxers as temporary shorts on your bottomless form. 

Rolling over on your side, you stare up at Joshua’s profile as he sits back down on the bed. The male still looks quite worried, but a small smile is still present on his face as he looks at you. “Have you been sleeping well?” He starts, unfolding the blankets on his bed and throwing it over you. You blink up at him, lifting the blanket in invitation. Joshua’s smile blooms wider, taking the cover from your hands and tucking it back in your sides.

Giving up, you’re burrowing yourself in the blankets, rubbing your face on Joshua’s sheets and pillows. The omega is confused. Brows once again furrowing and he tugs the blanket from your grasps slightly to make sure and— you whine, tugging the blanket back from his grasp and something clicks in Joshua’s head. “Y/N, are you nesting?” 

You don’t really answer but it's already obvious to Joshua that you are  _ indeed _ nesting on his bed. Which in fact is quite—strange. Mostly unfamiliar because nesting is normally done by omegas for finding comfort or when they’re in heat. Although betas are known to nest as well, the notion is uncommon and unnecessary even—betas having a much better grasp on their surroundings to pinpoint whatever discomfort and avoid the situation to be at ease. 

With you, something is unfamiliar; you’re not sure what’s bothering you which is why you’re slowly but gradually pulling all the sheets and blankets on Joshua’s bed to begin nesting. Joshua is frowning but you’re not sure what he’s upset about this time when you look at him.

Wordlessly, the omega takes off the cardigan he’s wearing, giving it to you and you smile happily, taking the piece of clothing and folding it to place beside the pillows. Joshua gives you the other omega’s belonging as well. Going around the room and picking up discarded clothes and unfolded sheets. You’re folding Jun’s t-shirt and Chan’s pillow case to add to your collection as Joshua folds Jihoon’s and Minghao’s belongings to give to you. 

Joshua smiles, though it’s a bit strained and he kisses your ears, murmuring that he’ll be right back and leaving the room with a soft click of the door. 

  
  
  
  
  
  


Downstairs, Seungcheol is shushing the other pack members, voice low and expression solemn on his face when he sighs heavily. “I’m sure everyone knows what this meeting is about,” he starts, watching the way Jun fidgets nervously and the empty look on Mingyu’s face. “we’ll have to fix this again. I want everyone to think of something that’ll ease Y/N’s worries.” A collective murmur breaks in the room and Seungcheol calls order again. “I want at least one member to stay with her during the day. Keep her distracted. Jun, you work on the same floor as her. Make sure everything’s fine.”

The omega in question jumps at the order, smiling nervously but he obediently nods his head. “I’ll take care of it,” he promises. 

The meeting ends easily after that, no other comments or suggestions and the serious tension in the room melts into something much warmer, something familiar. Joshua enters the room slowly, walking straight to Seungcheol who greets him with a kiss and the omega hooks his arms around the leader’s neck, whispering to his ear softly. 

Seungcheol’s brows furrow at the words, glancing back at Jeonghan who’s already looking at him with a brow raised. He looks back at Joshua when the omega detaches himself from Seungcheol’s embrace to hug Jeonghan. “She’s in the omega room,” is all Joshua says before pulling Jeonghan to the dining table where it’s already crowded. 

The pack leader doesn’t need anything else; he heads back to where you are. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is very self-indulgent :") and i hope you'll enjoy the journey this story will embark on (><)  
> there will definitely be members x members here... there already is but.. *wink wink* y'know what i mean  
> excuse me while i go die of embarrassment ( * /∇＼*)


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The churning in your stomach doesn’t stop even when you take a seat in your cubicle. Focusing back on work, you let the bustling floor distract your mind as you click mindlessly on the folders displayed on your screen. The feeling doesn’t leave even when lunch time rolls around. Declining a lunch invitation from a colleague, you make a beeline towards the bathroom. A bile rising up your throat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> uuu thank you so much for showing interest! i hope this story will stick with you well ( ^^ )ゞ

You’re rushing down the streets. Short heels faintly clicking in your ears and you perk up when seeing the familiar tall building of Seungcheol’s company enter your sights. You walk faster, practically sprinting as the hot chocolate in your hands sloshes in its cup from your jostled movements. 

The building in question is not only what your pack alpha owns, being the CEO, but also where you work as one of the editors. It’s an editing company from what you know, or at least what your branch in the building is mainly focused on. The company itself is notoriously large, dividing into multiple branches with various divisions spewn across the country. You think you’ve been working there for about three years now—your memory is a bit hazy of when exactly you started working. 

The income is generous, though you had to beg your pack alpha to treat you like any other employee (he complied with great reluctance), but it wasn’t enough to accomodate a shared lifestyle with your pack mates. They insisted you use whatever earnings you had for yourself and they’ll help cover the aspects you were lacking in whenever it concerned money. 

The company is where some of your pack members also work at. Jun as an Editor Executive while Jihoon is in Sound Production. You work on the same floor as Junhui since you’re also an editor though not part of his main team while Jihoon works on a different floor (you think it’s on the thirteenth floor..?). 

Different schedules are mostly the reason why you don’t go to the office the same time as your pack mates. On the rare occasions that you do have similar times entering the office, you take great pleasure in not running through subways and spending money on cabs just to get to work. You’re not really complaining though. 

Entering through the large revolving doors, you’re met with the busy main lobby of the building where other people are rushing to work. The hot chocolate in your hands is demoted to being warm chocolate when you take a quick sip, pressing on the elevator button to get to your floor. It opens in short time, entering smoothly before the small space is filled with other employees.

You’re forced to be on the back of the elevator after pressing your floor number, being wary of touching the handle because you never know who’s touched those very railings. Taking a longer sip of your beverage, you hear someone on your side breathing loudly. Eyes glancing furtively at the source, your stomach sinks when noticing the person—a beta next to you is trying and failing to sniff your scent secretly. 

You’re pressing yourself further against the elevator walls, trying to discreetly put whatever distance the packed room will allow but it proves to be useless when your silent harasser leans closer to you in faux stumble, as if someone had pushed him closer to you. You suppress whatever growl you’re throat is bubbling with, flinching away when the man’s hand slides down your hips dangerously close to your ass. 

He apologises, offering a disgusting smile but you don’t look at him, nodding your head and pushing your way forward when the elevator dings and the number is on your floor. Some people also move to get off while others don’t have it in their brains to step out just for a moment and instead shuffle around to allow you to pass. 

A sharp tap lands on your ass and you’re furious; turning around to see the same beta looking at you with a disgusting smirk and without much thinking, you dig your heels into his shoe and the man howls in pain, growling but you’re already out of the claustrophobic space and the door is closing with one last victory smile. 

Turning around, you yelp, stumbling back a few steps because Junhui is looking at you with wide eyes, a bemused smile on his face. “Shitty morning?” He laughs, taking your hot ( ~~warm~~ ) chocolate milk and drinking the beverage. You frown at your stolen treat, taking it back from him and rolling your eyes. 

Walking to your station, Junhui follows along much like a cat about to get his treat and you find yourself rolling your eyes again, this time, a smile stretching your lips. “Someone tried to get a feel and I did what any strong, independent woman would do. Using the power of heels,” you smile triumphantly, turning to Junhui to see he’s reaction. 

He laughs, shaking his head and leaning close to you when you take a seat at your station. “Of course no one would be able to resist you,” he starts, face close to yours and breath fanning against your face. His eyes glance down to your lips, not minding the potentiality that someone could see you in your open cubicle. Though it’s still early, it doesn’t mean your floor isn’t empty; faint clicks of keyboards distinct in your ears. “such a strong, independent woman—people could only _dream_ of touching you. You’re _ours_. And always will be.” Junhui is pulling away after that. Grinning at you brightly as if he hadn’t whispered such ambiguous words.

You’re gaping at him openly, watching the man take another sip of your drink. It’s definitely not fair. He’s—your boss, essentially. The head editor of your division and here he is drinking mildly warm hot chocolate like he hadn’t been trying to get into your pants. You’re still thinking of the duality of the omega to notice he’s finished your drink and is chucking it in the small trash bin you have in your office. 

“Anyway, I got the files you sent me the other day. Do you mind specifying which ones should be re-edited and used for this month’s cover?” Junhui questions, wiping his mouth with a tissue from the box on your desk and it snaps you back to reality. 

You straighten your back, nodding your head and turning on your computer. “Of course. Sure thing. I’ll send you the final revision-“

“No, I meant in my office. You just need to pick which ones from the files I organized. It’ll be much quicker if you just point out which ones on the spot than resending them.” He cuts you off easily, hands shoved into his pant’s pockets and you blink up at him. 

Your computer screen is already on and awaiting you to enter the password but you’re hesitating, looking back at Junhui who’s still waiting for your response. “I… of course. I’ll do just that,” you decide, watching the way a grin breaks out on Jun’s face and he tugs you up, walking briskly to his office. 

You think you know exactly what he’s planning—or maybe you really don’t. Junhui’s already entering his private office smoothly, ushering you to his desk and you don’t look back not even when the faint clicks of the door being locked rings heavily in your ears. The routine is familiar; you take a seat on Jun’s chair, the large computer screen already turned on and open the various data Jun’s already organized in one file. 

You’re clicking mindlessly, body heating up gradually when Jun leans forward over your shoulder. His hand is on the back of the chair, the other on his desk as he watches the computer screen where you work. You can feel the heat he radiates on your back, warm breath fanning over your neck as Junhui points at a different file you were about to open. “This one was really impressive,” he breathes, the hand on the back of the chair now smoothing down your back. “I liked the details you put in there.” The male whispers hotly in your ear, lips faintly pressing against the back of the skin. 

You’re burning up all over, face flushed and fingers shaking. Gripping the mouse harder to stop the tremors. You nod, clicking the file and changing its name to _Option 1_. You can still feel Jun’s hands caressing down your back, softly scratching the bumps of your bra strap before continuing down over your spine. A shiver runs over you when his finger dips past the waistband of your suit pants, fingers scratching over the skin of your tailbone. 

“Junnie,” you hiss in warning, opening a different file before deleting it altogether. Ignoring your warning, Jun’s hands move to squeeze your sides, pinching the area lightly and you flinch. He moves to the buttons of your pants. 

The male sighs, mouthing at the back of your ears as his fingers play with the front of your pants though not unbuttoning. “Good call. I think that one was too similar with last season’s cover,” he praises, his other hand snaked around your middle to start massaging a clothed breast lightly. 

“Junnie,” this time, a whine leaves your lips, leaning back against the chair as if to block his ministrations but Junhui is shoving you forward easily. 

He moves the keyboard away, emptying the spot on his desk before roughly shoving you on the smooth, wooden surface, kicking the chair you were sitting on back so he can stand behind you. “It’s alright, baby, let me take care of you,” the omega groans, kissing down your neck as his fingers start unbuttoning your pants. 

You’re absolutely burning now; breath short and desperately taking in whatever oxygen you can. Your fingers press against the desk to hold yourself up but Jun’s chest is pressed heavily against your back to allow little to no chance of movement. His hands tugs your pants down, over the curve of your ass and you mindlessly kick it off your legs. 

Cupping your heat, Jun’s fingers rub small circles against your covered sex, your stomach burning in a coiled knot as Jun continues his ministrations. “Cheol-hyung told us what he did to you the other day,” the omega breaths, biting your shoulder and smiling when you hiss in pain. He mouths at the spot apologetically. “Explained why the room smelled _so_ good.” 

In one swift, practiced movement, the male turns you around, hooking his arms around the back of your legs and lifting you up to sit on his desk. He’s pushing your legs apart, situating himself between them and capturing your lips in a heated kiss, prying your mouth open. You teasingly shut your lips, smiling into the kiss when Jun growls, biting your lip and whining in apology when he licks at the offended skin. 

He pulls away, a pout on his lip and fingers hooking in your underwear to tug them down. “Come on, Y/N, don’t be a tease,” he frowns, leaning forward again but you turn your head and his lips lands on your throat. Another groan leaves the omega’s lips but he’s sucking a mark on your neck, biting the skin lightly and you moan. 

Your panties are discarded, the material stretching slightly in the rough movements and Junhui throws it somewhere in the room, still busy sucking red marks into your neck. He pulls you closer to him by your legs, grinding your arousal on the material of his pants and it makes the two of you moan. The male sighs, kissing the red cherry on your neck and smiling up at you as he grinds harder. 

“Cheol-hyung told us you’re still too sensitive to be fucked,” he laughs lightly, grinning at your flushed face. “So tell me, baby. What did our alpha do to you to make you come _so_ hard? Jisoo-hyung had to sleep on Channie’s bed since his was soaked.” The omega moans, remembering how the others had sucked each other off when your scent sits heavy in their room. 

You’re panting heavily, moaning when Jun’s fingers creeps closer to your heat, teasing the opening before sliding a finger in smoothly; your arousal making it easier for him to enter you. Your mind is clouded, head thrown back and clutching the edges of the table to keep yourself grounded. Junhui shoves another finger in and you’re gasping for breath. 

“Junnie, Junnie— _please_ ,” the coil in your stomach tightens. Knuckles turning white from how hard you’re gripping the table and Junhui grins at your desperation, pressing another kiss to your lips. 

His tongue easily invades your mouth this time, too distracted to put up any resistance. Jun’s coaxing your tongue into his mouth, sucking on it lightly before breaking the kiss. It’s messy; drool dripping down your mouth and a string of saliva attaching your lips. Junhui inserts a third finger before asking, “Tell me how hyung pleasured you, love. What did he do to help you,” he breathes, trailing his lips down your throat and his free hand is unbuttoning your blouse.

You’re distracted by his question, face burning hotter when recalling the events that took place the day before. How your lead alpha had entered the room with his usual air of strong presence and confidence. Coaxing you to sit closer to the edge of the bed. _It’s alright, baby. Your alpha’s here_ , he murmured between your legs, tugging down the boxers.

A broken moan slips from your lips. Jun kneels between your legs, looking up at you as his mouth sucks the skin on your inner thigh, so close to where you want him. He doesn’t move any closer, not even when your legs hook around his head to pull him closer; the omega keeping your legs in place. 

_You’re a lot more sensitive than usual_ , your leader had murmured. His fingers drags delicious friction over your walls. He adds a third finger. _That’s alright_ , the alpha kisses down your stomach. _You just have to give yourself completely to me_ , growling, the pack alpha dives deep into your sex. Mouth sucking harshly on your clit as he his fingers piston in and out. 

“F- _fuck_ , he—he used his m- mouth,” you yelp, a whine stuck in your throat when Jun does just as you describe, mouth sucking on your clit and fingers going in and out at a relentless pace. His tongue invades your heat and you grab his head, unsure if you should pull him closer or push him away so your fingers tangle in his hair uselessly. 

The heat in your stomach coils tightly, bursting in time as you come with a loud moan. Your fingers are gripping Jun’s hair with whatever strength you have left and Jun groans, pulling away to watch your high drowning you. He pulls out his fingers slowly, not thinking twice before he’s sucking your arousal from his skin and the sight makes you whine; embarrassed. 

The omega smiles blissfully, rising up from his kneeled position to kiss you. It’s softer this time; sweet and so like Junhui you find it difficult to open your eyes after he’s pulled away. “I guess hyung must have bit your mark after that,” he sighs, fingers ghosting over the renewed pack mark on the back of your neck. The skin is slightly swollen as it usually is when the pack leader bites the same spot of the original mark. 

Pack marks won’t disappear unless the lead alpha no longer thinks of the member as part of the pack; so in hindsight, you don’t need to be bitten again but Seungcheol had promised you it would feel amazing—and your pack alpha never lies. 

Jun pecks your nose lightly, grabbing a spare towel he keeps in his desk drawer to start cleaning you. You’re still a bit sensitive so the sudden contact to your heat makes you flinch but Jun peppers kisses to your cheek comfortingly. He moves quickly; tugging your panties into place and helping you wear your pants back, buttoning up the clothing and fixing your blouse. 

You take notice of the dark markings over your chest and the top of your breasts, blinking at them absentmindedly before Jun is squeezing one breast in his palm. Your mouth opens in surprise but no sound escapes and you’re swatting at him like an angry cat while the omega laughs loudly, buttoning the last buttons up and moving away to avoid your attacks.

You’re still sitting on the desk, legs dangling a little as Jun scoots his chair closer to you. His hands easily finds themselves by your sides, holding you and being mindful so you wouldn’t fall off. “About not being able to fuck,” he starts and you slap a hand over his mouth. Jun giggles, biting your finger and holding your hands close to him perhaps to stop the continuous assaults. “Sorry. I meant the sensitivity. Are you alright? You’re not usually like this, right?” He questions gently, brows creasing in worry.

You’re not really sure how to answer, offering a small smile in return but you don’t look at him properly. The smell in the room is turning slightly bitter. A clear sign of Junhui’s displeasure but you’re not sure how to comfort him because the source of his concern is _you_. So you stay silent, watching your hands in his.

Junhui… is your saviour, you think. You don’t remember when— _how_ you joined the pack but all you know is Jun is the person who saved you from an attack. You remember rough fingers gripping your wrists, something sharp digging into the skin at your neck. You remember your head pounding, blood trickling the side of your face, your neck stinging with pain. Jun was the person who saved you. His scent of gentle comfort and soft, floral touches warm in your memories. It makes you upset that he’s not happy with something.

“Are you not interested in sex anymore, maybe?” 

You blink. Looking up at Junhui, his expression looks just as serious so you know he’s not poking fun at the situation. “That’s… No, I don’t think that’s it,” your voice is small when you say this. You were still able to offer Jihoon a blowjob two days ago and had been turned on by Mingyu yesterday morning. You also responded how you normally would with Seungcheol and Junhui and it wasn’t as if you were experiencing any personal conflict when concerning intercourse—you just get embarrassed when people talk about it like a daily topic. “I’ve just been really sensitive lately. I can’t last as long as I used to, I think.” 

The conclusion makes Junhui frown but you can’t pinpoint the source of his dissatisfaction this time when his scent suddenly lightens; the familiar scent of cherry blossom pouring into the room. “Right! Of course. Guess we’ll just have to be _extra_ gentle with you,” he teases, a bright smile on his face. “We won’t let anything happen to you, Y/N. You’re safe with us.” 

You return the smile, nose twitching slightly when something bitter enters your senses but you don’t get to dwell on the thought when a sharp knock sounds from the door. You jump, scrambling off the desk and Junhui is fidgeting as he fixes his tie. “What is it?” He calls out, looking at you with wide eyes and you’re gesturing to the door hurriedly. 

“You have an appointment with the CEO before lunch, sir.” The voice calls out, gruff and heavy. The sound makes your stomach queez lightly. It’s an alpha from what you can tell. “Did you get that, sir?” He continues when Junhui doesn’t respond.

“Oh, yeah, right. I’ll be right there. Thank you.” The alpha doesn’t respond and faint footsteps draws away from the door. You’re not sure when you started to tense up, but your shoulder relaxes when Jun turns to look at you. “Are you okay? You tensed up,” he questions, frown tugging his lips.

You nod, avoiding his eyes and you kiss his cheek quickly. Walking briskly to the door, you unlock it and thank the omega before exiting the room. The bitter smell is slightly stronger when you step out and you stumble a bit at the sudden smell. Your head hurts a little at the overwhelming scent; though it was faint, the bitterness was enough to make something unpleasant spread in your mouth. Before you can pinpoint exactly what it was, it’s instantly gone.

The churning in your stomach doesn’t stop even when you take a seat in your cubicle. Focusing back on work, you let the bustling floor distract your mind as you click mindlessly on the folders displayed on your screen. The feeling doesn’t leave even when lunch time rolls around. Declining a lunch invitation from a colleague, you make a beeline towards the bathroom. A bile rising up your throat.   
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


It’s almost five past thirty when your phone vibrates. The display name is familiar and you pick up after the third ring. “ _Hey, baby_ ,” Joshua’s voice breathes through the quiet volume pressed against your ear. It makes you stop typing for a moment before you resume, pressing your phone against your ear and shoulder to trap the device in place. 

“Hi,” you respond softly, resuming your work and Joshua hums. “Do you need something?” You question. It’s becoming increasingly emptier in the office. Many workers tapping out since they were mostly done with their projects or opting to continue the next day but you’re still trying to distract yourself with a little more work. 

“ _Do you think you can get the day off tomorrow and come on down to the hospital for a check up?_ ” The male through the phone questions. It makes you pause momentarily since you weren’t expecting the suggestion. You’re starting to worry a bit about what it could mean. 

Joshua continues, as if sensing your hesitance and he laughs softly, the sound calming you a little. “ _There’s nothing serious. Seokmin just suggested you check yourself physically first before we can start assuming things. We have to make sure you’re fine, baby. Don’t you want to feel better?_ ” the omega coos over the phone, your stomach squeezing pleasantly at the kind offer. 

“Yeah, of course,” you respond after a momentary pause. Smiling when Joshua perks up and tells you the rough sketch of your impromptu appointment. You think that he’s already told Jun and Seungcheol about your day off tomorrow so there’s really no point but you make an email to Jun asking for a leave the next day just to make sure. 

The call ends after he confirms your agreements and the omega promises to tell you the details later tonight or tomorrow morning in case he comes home late and you’re already asleep. It’s quite funny to you how your pack members are conveniently occupied with a job befitting of their nature. Joshua working as a doctor in one of Seoul’s most prestigious hospitals and also as the pack’s personal mother hen; the others coming to him whenever someone bruises just the slightest bit. 

Seokmin works as a psychologist, being a beta with a wonderful personality, he’s someone who understands others very well on account of their nature so you always find yourself confiding in him when there’s a bad day. It’s slightly convenient for you and your pack members; regular checkups and personal care being provided by the two warm pack members. 

You’re turning off your computer after backing up the data, calling it a night. Stretching your hands above your head as your computer shuts down, you glance at the clock and it’s already six past fifteen. A satisfying pop sounds from your shoulders; muscles stretching and easing the tension. You think of calling someone to pick you up but decide against it in case they were still busy with work. 

The floor you work on is almost empty since workers don’t usually take night shifts, so some lights in the far corner are already being turned off. The elevator is also empty when you step in, closing the doors shut after pressing the lobby button. It’s after two to three floors down that the elevator doors open again and someone steps in. You scoot to the side, politely keeping distance while keeping your head down. 

The person is tall; figure intimidating and the small room of the elevator is engulfed by the undoubtful scent of alpha. You think he’s upset with something by the smell he radiates but the alpha is silent, standing in the other corner away from you and you’re quite grateful. His smell is overwhelming. The closed space of the elevator room not helping your case and your mind is too preoccupied on whether to offer conversation or not; the beta in you wanting to ease the tension.

The elevator chimes suddenly and it makes you jump. You don’t think about your previous thought, hastily walking out but the sudden grip on your wrist makes you yelp. The alpha is holding on to you tightly, lips pulled in a snarl and you stare with wide eyes at the sudden shift of emotions. He’s tugging you back in, fingers digging into your skin and it makes you wince; your fingers going numb.

You tug back, using whatever strength left from your initial fright and the alpha growls. The sound makes you shiver, weary if you should scratch him with your other hand but if he catches that too then there’s no doubt you’ll lose this fight. “Fuck, let go—” you hiss, making a move to claw at his hand but you’re pulled back roughly before the elevator doors can close in on you. 

Soonyoung growls, the sound making you flinch and he sprints to the elevator, hitting the metal doors when they close shut. He’s scowling, expression the angriest you’ve ever seen on his usually happy face as he presses the elevator buttons as if they would open again. Giving up, the alpha turns to you. His aura is still filled with rage but he eases the scowl on his face and focuses on you. 

You’re silent as you stare at him, cradling your bruised arm to yourself and you flinch when Soonyoung approaches; taking a step back. He winces, face contorting as if he was stabbed painfully but he manages a small smile. “It’s alright, Y/N, I’m sorry- I must have scared you, didn’t I? You’re alright, baby. I won’t hurt you,” He promises, taking a tentative step forward and relaxing when you don’t move away.

“Sorry,” you whisper, clearing your throat and letting the alpha pull you into a hug. You relax, the familiar scent of Soonyoung drowning your senses and a small, shaky sigh leaves your lips. “He surprised me.” You continue weakly, pressing your forehead against Soonyoung’s shoulder. 

His scent is still one of displeasure and it spikes slightly with your last sentence. He doesn’t say anything else, smoothing a hand down your back comfortingly and sighing next to your head. “Seriously, the type of assholes working here,” He murmurs exasperatedly. The angry complaint makes you smile and you press your face harder against Soonyoung’s shoulder, rubbing your cheek there to ease his tension.

“Let’s just go home, yeah?” You pull away, smiling but Soonyoung is still looking at you worriedly. 

He’s silent for a moment, gently pulling you away from the front of the elevator doors and into an empty hall. The alpha is slowly pushing you against the wall, leaning closer and trapping you between his arms. “You’re not… bothered by what happened? Does it _normally_ happen?” His eyes bore deep into yours, as if looking for any secrets or discomfort in them but you’re still smiling gently. 

“I’m really tired, Youngie,” you sigh, leaning back against the wall and sliding down a bit. “Let’s go home, yeah?” You offer again and the alpha in front of you sighs heavily, nodding his head in defeat and you push him away slightly to take hold of his hand, walking towards the exit of the building. 

You don’t really pay attention when Soonyoung sends a text, walking down the street leisurely with the dark sky watching over your journey home with your alpha.

A nagging feeling sits in the back of your mind when remembering the panicked look of the alpha in the elevator.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh my lord, haha, i have a bunch of ideas for this but thinking up the right scenario is *wipes tears* very fun. and since this is mostly something i do for fun, the pace might not be consistent so i hope you'll be patient with me! thank you ( っ´ω｀c )  
> also, i love jun a bunch so i made him something here hoho (ﾐゝᆽ0ﾐ)


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> All and every question is running through your mind. You don’t understand what this means. How long have you known them for exactly?

Minghao is slowly wrapping a bandage around your wrist. He’s silent and it makes the argument down in the living room much more prominent. Joshua is shouting loudly downstairs, voice on the edge of hysterical as Seuncheol tries in vain to calm the lead omega. The walls of the apartment are by no means thin, but every word you hear makes the edges of the knife called guilt stab harder. 

“ _She could have been_ hurt _. God forbid if that son of a bitch actually managed to pull her in that fucking—_ ”

A loud crash sounds from downstairs and it makes you flinch. Minghao is sitting on the edge of your bed, finished with his task of tending to your swollen wrist and is looking at you with a crestfallen expression on his beautiful face. The red, angry marks on your wrist are visible, the skin swollen and slowly turning to a dark, purple colour. It’s hidden under the white bandages but the whole pack had already seen the damage and Joshua had gone livid after Soonyoung explained, the wrath back on his face.

Minghao had been ushered to treat your injury, the younger omega silent the whole time as he takes you to your room and Joshua unleashes anger against whatever inanimate object present downstairs when you’re gone. You don’t see the anger being unleashed but you can still hear and smell the dark atmosphere engulfing the whole apartment. It makes the ache in your heart hurt much more than the pain in your wrist. 

“Try not to think too much,” Minghao starts softly, tidying the first aid kit and folding the remaining bandages into a neat roll; putting it back in its original place. “Anyone would be upset about what happened to you today. Wonwoo-hyung’s already checking security to bring him to court.”

You don’t feel much better from the statement, thinking of how the resident lawyer of your pack would not stop until your assailant is seen with a suitable punishment. Though you’re slightly worried about how the alpha would deem _suitable_ when the case would concern you as a victim. You’re still not sure what to think of the whole experience. 

It wasn’t as if the events didn’t scare you; you were downright terrified just thinking about it—but something about how the alpha acted was strange. You don’t think you’ve ever seen him before, not on your floor or Jihoon’s floor. Not even when passing by the main lobby. You think he’s a new employee but (from what you knew) Seungcheol isn’t taking anyone in for the editing branch and if the alpha was indeed new, he wouldn’t even be in the same building as you; working in another branch in a different city. 

Minghao is caressing your leg with his thumb softly, looking at you with a sympathetic smile. You manage a smile of your own before another crash and a shout (from Jeonghan..?) interrupts the quiet atmosphere and it makes you groan. 

Minghao sighs, tapping your leg and you silently get under the covers of your bed, looking at him curiously when the omega gets up from his spot next to you. “Give me a sec, I’ll be right back,” he’s murmuring, getting up and walking outside your room in long, quick strides. 

You get comfortable on the soft bedding, leaning back against the various pillows and adjusting the blanket on your legs. It doesn’t take long for Minghao to return, shutting the door behind him and it muffles the sound a lot better than before though barely; the sounds still faintly heard from outside. 

The omega is smiling at you, nose scrunching cutely as he hops on the bed. The soft cushions under you bounces from the impact and you scoot over with a laugh as Minghao cuddles up next to you. “Here, I wanted to show you this,” the undertone of excitement is present in his voice as he shows you print out photos of various scenarios. 

They’re neatly stacked together in a small pile. A clear, plastic card pack is used as the packaging. A protective cover as well as to show the contents of the first picture. The photo pack he shows you this time is a multitude of different objects. You’re trying to figure out what the theme is before spotting something between the photos Minghao lays out on your lap. 

“Oh!” you gasp, lifting up the polaroid of Seungkwan’s head barely poking in the picture, covering a flower vase you assume was Minghao’s previous target. “This one’s cute,” you turn it around to show your companion and Minghao rolls his eyes but he’s grinning. 

“The idiot,” he starts, laughing right afterwards and plucking the picture from your hand and turning it so you can see too. “He knew I was going to take a picture of it and stood near the vase the whole night. I almost broke my back just to get a good angle and he did this.” He sighs in exasperation, wiping a palm down his face as if to wash away the bitter memory but he’s smiling fondly.

The pictures laid out for you have parts of the others in it, even just the bare minimum of the back of Jihoon’s head poking out from a sunflower field road. It’s endearing if anything else and you find yourself studying each and every picture to see the types of intentional or unintentional photobombs of all your pack members in the photographer’s work. 

You think Minghao himself won’t be in anything since he’s the one taking the shot but you spot one photo with the side of his head slightly blurred next to a painting, a piece sign of Jun’s fingers barely poking in the shot. The dim lighting makes the picture much more pleasing to look at and all the romance novel quotes are inspiring you to think that Minghao must be part of the artwork in the museum. 

“Don’t even say it,” The male you’re admiring breathes against your shoulder, hand thrown over your middle and face pressed against you and the pillows. 

You blink at him, the beginning of a grin blooming on your face. “I. Said nothing?” you laugh and Minghao pinches your sides softly, hiding his smile as he turns his body to face you. 

He’s throwing his legs over yours under the blankets, making you groan and the pictures scatter. You’re tidying them carefully when Minghao finally shows his face. “This one,” he picks up a picture from between the sheets that escaped your vision. “it’s my favorite.” It’s a picture of you. Grinning as you face the youngest omega of the pack, Chan’s body facing away from the camera but you can see the incredulous look he’s giving you in the photo. Your smile is bright in the picture, fingers covered in frosting and your own face painted in the sweet, pastel-coloured paint.

“It was Chan’s birthday. You suddenly attacked him with the frostings on his cake and—he was not impressed.” Minghao stutters on a laugh. The sound is cute and small and you’re instantly confident that you would fight an army for him. But… something doesn’t feel right to you.

The longer you stare at the picture, the more confused you feel. You return the stacked pile of polaroids into its case, taking the one on Minghao’s hand. It’s….. strange. You don’t really remember which birthday this was from. Last year…? Two years before that? When did you join the pack to have celebrated a possible birthday celebration with them? Exactly _how long_ have you been part of the pack. 

“Hao, is it possible to have amnesia from overexertion? I don’t… I can’t remember which birthday party this is from,” you frown, not noticing the blank look that appeared on Minghao’s face. 

It’s replaced with a worried expression, the omega instantly sitting up from his position and untangling himself from you to look at you better. “You can’t.. remember this? It’s from four years ago.” 

Something sinks in your stomach. Your mouth opens to ask him to elaborate but no sound passes your lips and you stare at the picture closer as if it would answer all the questions in your mind. “Four years….” you murmur, staring at the picture; horrified. 

Your picture self does look a lot younger than you are now. Cheeks still swollen with youth and Chan doesn’t look as muscular as he does now judging from his back and posture. All and every question is running through your mind. You don’t understand what this means. How long have you known them for exactly?

 _When and how did you join the pack?_ How long have you known them even before that? If the picture is from four years ago and you already look so close with Chan then… you were already part of the pack that time? That would mean you started working _after_ you joined the pack? That doesn’t make sense to you. You _know_ you joined the pack after Junhui saved you. After he brought you to his members and they took care of you. He saved you during work because that’s where you met him. How the _hell_ have you known them even before that?

“Hey, hey, Y/N, breath. You’ll faint—don’t do that,” Minghao is gently coaxing you to do as he says, holding your cheeks in his hands and forcing you to look at him. His hand is massaging the back of your neck gently, fingers brushing against the pack mark and you flinch. 

Your fingers pry his hands away from your face because the gesture makes you panic. That doesn’t make sense. Nothing does. Why can’t you remember the birthday party—even before that. You have amnesia from four years ago? 

That doesn’t make sense. You’re absolutely sure you’ve been working for three years at Seungcheol’s company and somewhere between those three years you were almost forced claimed by an alpha before Junhui saved you; so you’ve been part of the pack for at least two years. But you don’t remember any of that.

Something in you is telling you that _you’re wrong_ and this is where you belong. That you’ve known your pack members for _four years_ but your mind is racing with more doubts than security. You can’t possibly have lived in these walls for more than four years. What was your life before that? You can’t even remember. 

Minghao is still trying to make you focus on him. His head is muddled by the bitter scent you’re in; absolutely distressed. Betas don’t show their weaknesses often as they have a better understanding of themselves and prefer to be alone when struggling. So the scent of heavy smoke is suffocating and the ash leaves a bitter taste in the omega’s mouth. 

He’s tugging your fingers to his neck, pressing your palm right under his scent glands and rubbing your hand there. “Focus on me, Y/N. What do you smell? Tell me,” his voice is firm and demanding, unbefitting of an omega’s nature but it’s _Minghao_ who’s commanding you and it pulls your mind from drowning in something deep and back to him. 

Your mouth opens and closes like a gaping fish but Minghao is still waiting for you to answer so you press your hands harder against his neck just the slightest bit. The area under your palm is cool and sweet. The intoxicating smell of elixir spreads in the air; almost drowning your own bitter scent. The candlelit of burnt sugar makes your nose twitch from the sudden sweetness but you’re relaxing back against the pillows. 

The beta in you is purring. Content and filled with the care being provided to you. The stiffness on your shoulder gradually melts and you sigh, eyes slightly wet as you pull Minghao to lay on top of you. “Sugar—burnt. It’s burnt sugar,” your throat hurts when you speak so the words are quiet and dry when you finally answer. 

Minghao doesn’t say anything else, letting you rub your cheek under his jaw. Your forehead is on his shoulder now, somehow spent from overthinking and you’re pulling him towards you as you lie down on the bed. 

Your packmate relaxes in your hold, shifting his body so his weight doesn’t crush you but you still cling to him tightly so there’s not much distance between you. “What were you thinking about?” The tone in his voice is light and airy as if walking between shards of glass but the omega snuggles closer to you so you know he’s still comfortable in your presence. 

You’re quiet for a moment. Thinking of an answer for his simple inquiry and it frustrates you why you feel the need to mask everything. You feel like you shouldn’t tell him about your thoughts but your beta is thrashing with the very thought of keeping a secret from your pack member. “A lot,” you start slowly, hesitant before continuing. “There was a lot on my mind. I got overwhelmed by it.” You feel like that’s the most honest you can be and it makes you frown.

Minghao is silent. He doesn’t say anything and somehow the room is void of any sound. No previous shouting downstairs, no whirring of the air conditioner, no pack member running outside the halls. It was as if the world itself had reduced its population to only you and the omega in your arms but Minghao starts talking before your mind races with anymore thoughts.

“It’s probably… from overworking.” His tone is laced with underwhelming fatigue and it makes you think that the male was sleeping when he had gone quiet. “Jihoon-hyung said you went home much later than he usually does last week. And he normally clocks out by _one_ in the morning,” his tone is condescending now. Much like a mother chastising her child for a crime they committed and you purse your lips; trying to think of a defense. 

“I… can’t argue with that. It was only one time though. For a project,” Your reasoning is weak and it’s evident when Minghao’s sigh was enough to crumble your defenses and take victory. 

His finger pinches your sides and you move away from the assault, slightly exasperated with the amount of your pack members that likes attacking you with pinches. “Doesn’t mean you should normalize it. _For whatever reason_ ,” he continues when sensing you’re about to make a retort. 

You shut your mouth after that because _what the hell_ , you’re a grown woman already part of society and _older_ than the omega lecturing you. You feel like a child despite being the one to spoon the male in your arms. It’s mostly good natured though. You’re aware he’s only telling you this for your well-being and you suddenly feel like you have a much deeper understanding of the younger ones in the pack when they’re being scolded. 

“Right,” you agree easily, fingers carding through Minghao’s brown hair. “I’ll keep that in mind.” 

You feel like Minghao is rolling his eyes when he also rolls around to bury his face in your chest. “Apply it as well. Not just take notes.” He snickers when you loudly complain _why is this suddenly a practical exam_ , but your fingers are still untangling the knots in his hair so Minghao is content when you hum in understanding afterwards. 

Your eyelids are suddenly heavier, closing over your eyes and you find it difficult to open them again. A sharp prick stings your forearm and you flinch before hearing Minghao complain about a mosquito, rubbing the spot where you were bitten and a smile spreads on your face though you can’t open your eyes. 

You're not sure when, but your mind easily slips to unconsciousness; succumbing to sleep. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


When you wake up again, it’s two in the morning. Bleary eyed and sporting a headache, the screen light of your phone glares down at your face. You wince from the sudden brightness, instantly turning the phone off and throwing it somewhere near your legs. Your room is void of anyone else aside yourself and it makes you frown, wondering where your sleeping buddy has gone. 

Your curiosity isn’t enough to make you move from the bed though, so you stay still on the soft cushions, covering your eyes with your elbow. Your room is dark, the lights turned off and any other sound in the room is the soft whirring of the air conditioner. Despite your fatigue, you can’t really bring yourself to fall asleep again.

Blankly staring at the clock hanged on the wall across from you, you will whatever energy you’ve replenished from your sleep to throw the covers from your body. The room is cold and the sudden temperature drops makes you shiver. You don’t remember cranking up the AC before falling asleep….

Assuming that Minghao was the one to tamper with the remote, you lower the fan. Grabbing a cardigan for extra warmth. A sudden ache in your arm throbs, making you wince in pain. A small red dot decorates the spot in your arm where the skin is irritated. You stare at it with brows furrowed, trying to think of what that is. It’s dried blood, you find out when gently scratching the area, the dried substance chipping under your nail and gushing out fresher ones. 

That can’t possibly be from a mosquito bite, your mind provides when remembering what Minghao had said before you fell asleep. You were given a shot? _Minghao_ had given you a shot? From a position where he was cradled in your arms? You remember him hugging you back so he can’t possibly give you a shot in such a complex position. He wouldn’t even be able to _see_ with burrowing his face in your chest and all.

So what the actual fuck is this?

A mosquito did this? 

Nothing seems to be making sense to you. Your legs are turning jelly, losing its strength and you lean back against the wall for support. Suddenly, your racing thoughts from earlier come rushing back. The abrupt wave of confusion and uncertainty makes your mind race. Your chest feels tighter, as if a python is coiling around the area and slowly squeezing the life out of you to make you fall prey.

_Deep breaths, deep breaths._

Going through all the panic attacks procedure Seokmin had ever taught you, you will your mind to get a grip. It’s harder without anyone going through the steps with you somehow. You’re trying to remember when was the last time you’ve ever dealt with something like this alone.

_Never._

Your mind once again provides helpfully. 

The thought makes you grimace. You’ve never dealt with anything like this alone? What about your stressful college life? You’ve never….

A horrifying thought makes you freeze, sliding down the wall and clutching the material of your shirt over your chest. 

You can’t remember what your college life was like. All thoughts going back to the word _pack, pack, pack_ . You don’t have a life before them. Your memories won’t provide you with any other thoughts aside from _them_. You were never alive before that. You never had one. 

Something is telling you to move, move, _move_ . To find your pack alpha and comfort you, make the ugly thoughts go away and— _no_ . You need answers. You need to know what your life was like before you worked, before you lived in this apartment, before _them_. You need to know.

You feel like you’ll suffocate and die if you don’t. 

Summoning all your strengths, you force your legs to work. Stand up with the wall as leverage and turn the doorknob. Even a simple task like that proves to be difficult. Your body isn’t responding how you want it to. It’s refusing your commands as if it wasn’t yours; as if it wasn’t your body and your soul only lives there, but you don't have control. 

Tears of frustration are beginning to prick your eyes. Why the _fuck_ aren’t your legs moving properly. Your hips are hurting and knees are caving in. There’s an ache in your belly and—the fuck is going on. 

There’s absolutely no doubt in your mind with the fire slowly creeping up your stomach; you’re going into _heat_. 

You can’t fathom this. Your pack is not lacking omegas so you shouldn’t have to fill in the role of one. But somehow, the hot, searing coil of arousal is clawing deep in your stomach and spreading like wildfire through your body. You’re starting to pant, sweat gathering on your head. 

A small whimper leaves your lips when the burning flame is starting to hurt. It’s shredding up your insides; desperate to be filled and relieved of the pain. The beta in you is whimpering, slowly succumbing to the need of fulfilling a roll; going into heat and deepening a bond. 

You need Seungcheol. Your alpha, your leader. He’ll fix this. He’ll save you from the pain, soothe your beta because he’s your _alpha_ and he won’t let you get hurt. 

You’re not sure how but you’re tumbling down the corridor to the stairs like someone who had too much to drink. Mind intoxicated in something much more poisonous than alcohol. You need relief and your beta is telling you to find it. 

Seungcheol is on the living room couch. His face is covered by his hand where he places his elbow over his chest. You’re not sure if he’s sleeping in that position or why he’s still in the living room at two- maybe even three in the morning but your beta is absolutely ecstatic. You feel like you’ll reach your high just from looking at him. 

Seungcheol snaps his head towards your direction, practically giving himself a whiplash and you’re instantly scooped in his arms. “What’s wrong? Why are you awake—Y/N? You’re going into heat?” The realization dawns on him and a growl claws its way up his throat. The sound is deep and possessive when it leaves his lips. 

You’re being pushed towards the couch roughly, movements rushed and uncaring of the way your legs drag under you. The back of your knees makes contact with the furniture and Seungcheol is on top of you. Caging you between his arms, his legs straddling yours and putting pressure there so you won’t be able to squirm away. You don’t fight back, you don’t have to. He’s your alpha and his scent makes you whine needily, clawing at your shirt in an attempt to take it off. 

“Why are you in heat, baby?” The lead alpha manages to ask, panting heavily and burrowing his face in your neck. He takes a deep breath and groans in satisfaction from the sweet smell you’re emitting; no doubt one of heat. 

You can’t bring yourself to focus. Tears are prickling your eyes and you feel so relieved to be close to him like this. A sharp rut against your legs makes you gasp for air. The feeling of hardness makes you whine in need. You’re shaking your head but you don’t know if it means to stop or if it’s to answer his question. “I- I don’t know. Was sl- sleeping and woke up—“ 

A sharp whine leaves your throat when Seungcheol bites the juncture between your neck and shoulder. It hurts. His canine piercing the skin and a small trickle of blood oozes from the spot. Your alpha is licking at the small trail apologetically, kissing the spot to soothe you. 

“ _Hnghh_ , more, alpha. _It hurts_ ,” your voice is wet, much like the steady stream of tears trailing down your cheeks. Seungcheol pries your cardigan away from your shoulder, a small ripping sound heard but you can’t bring yourself to care much. Bucking your hips up to get more friction, you whimper when Seungcheol won’t allow you even that. His hips press down harder on top of you, not allowing you to move.

The room is dark as is the look in your alpha’s eyes. His lips are capturing your own in a heated kiss. His tongue shoved down your throat and trailing the inside of your mouth. Seungcheol’s finger trails over your skin under your shirt. The material rides up your body and settles over your breast as he plays with your hardened nipples. 

Your head is thrown back, breaking the kiss and exposing your neck for Seungcheol to mark. His other hand is playing with the waistband of your shorts, sliding them down your legs and you kick the offending cotton away from you. 

“That’s it,” he breathes, hands sliding down to caress your hip soothingly. He moves down, slides off of you and easily pushes your legs apart to situate himself between them. His fingers slowly drag the cotton of your panties down your legs. He’s a bit distracted at seeing the slick pooling in your legs. The amount already trickling down your thighs much like an omega in heat.

Beta’s can’t produce slick like omegas can but one in heat behaves just like any other omega in heat. You’re trying to fulfil the role of one. An automatic response when your beta is telling you to get closer with the pack; to strengthen your bonds—Seungcheol knows why you’re going into heat. 

“So good for me. Do you want to be filled, baby? You’ll feel so good. Stuffed full taking my cock. I’ll take good care of you,” the promise of being filled makes you whine, bucking your hips up to get closer. 

Your head is muddled. You feel like you’ll die if you’re not filled soon. “Please, please— _alpha_ . Need- need your knot. Give it to me- please. It _hurts_ ,” you’re crying openly now, fisting the shirt you’re wearing and sobbing pathetically. The ache in your belly is unbearable. You’ll _die_ —you’ll definitely die if you don’t get filled soon-

The sudden nudge of Seungcheol’s cock against your wet folds makes your breath hitch. You keen, moaning loudly when his dick finally enters you in one swift movement. Seungcheol groans loudly, the sound feral and satisfied, amazed that you’re able to take him smoothly. He kneels on the ground, pulling your hips closer to the edge of the couch and rolls his hips, pleased at the broken moan you give in response. 

He’s large as is the rest of the alphas in your pack but something about Seungcheol makes you feel like you’re about to burst. Your breathing is ragged, wheezing for air as Seungcheol presses his open palm against your lower stomach. You grunt, feeling the added pressure where his cock sits snug inside you. 

He only waits a few moments for you to adjust before pulling back slightly, pushing forward where his hips hits the skin of your thighs. The volume of your voice is no longer filtered, crying out with each sharp thrust of the alpha’s hips. The head of his cock hits your g-spot each time, kissing the bundle of nerves and it makes you sob. 

You’re babbling incoherently, a mess of tears and begging. Seungcheol pulls you by the hips with each thrust, meeting in the middle with sharp slaps of skin against skin. You’re clenching down on him with every sharp motion he lays out on you. Fingers clutching anything and everything to keep yourself grounded as Seungcheol leans forward as if to get deeper inside you.

He’s crushing you with his weight, pushing forward with more force from the added leverage. Your hips are lifted up from the cushions, body slowly folded forward when Seungcheol grabs the back of your knees and folds you into a mating press. 

The alpha uses the position to thrust deeper, pistoning in and out at a much faster pace. Your mind is blanking out from pleasure. Delicious drags of Seungcheol’s cock rubbing against your walls and hitting your g-spot each time. “Alpha, alpha, _alpha_ ,” you chant like a prayer; knowing nothing else aside from this.

“ _Fuck_ , tell me, Y/N. Do you want my knot?” He manages to grunt, groaning when you seem to clench down harder at the question. He can’t just knot you without your full consent, his mind warns him. You’re his as is everyone in the pack but you’re a _beta_. You’ll break if he knots you when you’re not ready.

You’re still sobbing, shaking your head but Seungcheol doesn’t know what you mean when you’re pulling on his shirt as if he’ll pull away. “ _Please_ , give me your knot. I- I want- mngh—” you choke on a moan, head thrown back when the alpha rubs your clit with rough fingers. You blink, dazed, and you’re looking at Seungcheol as if in a trance.

Your fingers cup his cheeks tenderly, soft touches contrast to the way Seungcheol is thrusting inside you. Your thumb is rubbing the skin over his cheekbone as if you’re handling porcelain. “Give me your knot. Please Cheolie? I want it- want your knot.” 

_Fuck._

Seungcheol thinks you’ll kill him. You’ll absolutely murder him. 

“Shit. Fuck— Y- yeah, baby, of course. I’ll give you my knot,” he captures your lips in a deep kiss. Fingers rubbing your cheek and his hips stills to start grinding harshly. You’re crying, tears falling from your eyes but you look so blissed out, Seungcheol continues his rough ministrations.

You come with a strangled moan, body convulsing is soft jolts and you collapse on the couch. Seungcheol’s fingers leave your clit but he’s still grinding his cock into you harshly. The pinpricks of overstimulation sends jolts of electricity through your body and it makes you moan weakly in protest. 

The base of Seungcheol’s cock is starting to swell, pressing forward harder to force his knot into you. You feel like you’re being torn apart. It’s getting harder to breath. Seungcheol’s knot swells and locks into place inside you, his cum painting your walls and you feel like you’re about to burst. 

“Fuck, fuck, hurts- Ngh. Cheolie—” You’re grunting in pain, squirming in an attempt of escape but Seungcheol’s weight is still pinning you against the couch.

“Shh, it’s alright. I got you. You’re fine. You’re being _so good_ to me- so good for your alpha. Just focus on me, Y/N. Listen to my voice. You’re alright,” he presses soft kisses to your face, licking away the tears that spill over your cheeks. 

Seungcheol slowly lays your legs down, his movements gentle so as to not further hurt you. You’re starting to get used to the sensation, your beta purring in content and whispering words that _you’re being good_. That you made your alpha happy. 

“Do you think you can move? We need to get in a more comfortable position so you won’t be sore later,” Seungcheol questions softly, pulling the edges of your shirt over your body to cover yourself. He peers into your face when you don’t respond and feels something twist inside him. 

You look absolutely dazed, eyes hazy and expression fucked out. You don’t focus on him despite your hands around his neck and Seungcheol growls at the realisation. “Fuck,” he whispers softly, snaking his arm around your back and lifting you up. You moan at the sudden movement, shaking in his hold and whimpering pathetically. 

Seungcheol shushes you, kissing the side of your head as he lays on the couch, making your legs straddle him as you lay on top of him. You moan softly, blinking in surprise when you sink down deeper on his knot from the position. You look at Seungcheol in astonishment, looking down at the spot where you know his cock sits snug, locked inside you by his knot. 

“Come here, baby,” Seungcheol coaxes, pulling your arm so you lay on top of him, head tucked under his chin. 

Seungcheol doesn’t say anything else, lulling you to sleep with soft purrs and his hand rubbing soothing circles on your back. 

You can’t think of anything else aside from the feeling of Seungcheol inside and against you. Your mind loses its battle against exhaustion. The last thought on your mind wondering why your heat didn’t break before everything turns dark.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *finger guns* this was fun


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What are they protecting you from…?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my dumbass really confused prostate with g-spot lmao  
> thank you for kindly informing me! it's been fixed in the previous chapter and please continue to inform me if there are mistakes!! thank you!!

You remember your mother and father talking one time. In hushed whispers; the one where they’re being much louder than what the volume of a whisper is supposed to be. You remember them talking… about you. Maybe. It’s a little fuzzy. 

You’re not even sure if it was a memory.

Your parents talked about you presenting. Your mother eased in the idea of you presenting as an omega. Same as her, you think. Maybe. You can’t remember if she was one herself. 

Your father had different ideas. Chastising your mother jokingly and telling her he was absolutely sure you would be an alpha. You have a tough personality, he said. Won’t take bullshit like any other competitive alpha. You’re sure he himself is one.

Everything fades dark and another fragment flashes in front your eyes.

This time, everything is unfamiliar to you.

You don’t think you’re familiar with this one; the awkward tension in the air. Your mother is silent. Your father isn’t looking at you. 

_ It’s alright, _ you think that’s your mother's voice. It sounds strange.  _ Being a beta isn’t so bad, dear. _ She assures you but you don’t get it. You don’t think you’ve ever thought of them as anything bad. Why is she trying to comfort you..?

Your father pulls your mother away from—a much smaller you now that you pay attention. He’s in another room but it’s obvious he’s not trying to hide anything. 

_ We can’t keep her safe like this, _ he’s furious somehow. You don’t know why, but he sounds devastated. Voice edged with desperation and hurt. 

Why can't they keep you safe? Being a beta doesn’t need protecting, you think. Little you looks a little sad when she hears that. 

_ She’ll be fine—she has to, _ your mother reassures but her voice is breaking off and you think she might be crying. 

What are they protecting you from…?

_ Her scent is  _ not _ normal, _ your father is shouting now, getting a grip when he later on says; voice broken and laced with tears,  _ We have to keep her safe.  _

You think you feel everything and nothing after that. Fragments flashes before your eyes like the last images of your life before death but you’re not familiar with them. Like they’re not yours and you’re watching someone else live their life. Someone small and younger with a similar face as yours growing up. 

There’s a familiar sound in your ears and the fragments freeze, as if paused during a wrong timing of a movie because you look at a mirror image of yourself staring back; wide eyed and disheveled. As if being hunted down by a demon and there’s this—familiar pain in your neck. 

It throbs, spreads like hot iron against skin and you—the  _ real _ you is suffocating. Hands clutch at your neck, squeezing the flesh and it feels all too real when you can’t breath. 

“ _ I’ve been looking for someone like you, _ ” the voice is ugly. It makes bile rise up your throat and tears pool at your eyes. The sick words whispered in your ears as if spilling secrets only the devil meant to hear. 

“ _ Don’t think you won’t fall prey, you filthy bitch. Only monsters would want something like you, _ ” it whispers against the shell of your ear. The oxygen flow cuts from your head, rendering you motionless in its hold. 

You feel like you should kick and scream; put up whatever resistance but you can’t possibly protect yourself from a monster you know nothing about. It whispers traitorous words into your ear and you scream, trashing in its hold. 

Your neck pools blood and spills in a steady flow, filling the cup of greed as it forces you to yield.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


  
  
  


“She’s in  _ heat _ ?” 

“I don’t know, Jeonghan. You tell me what it looks like she’s in,” Seungcheol’s voice is tired when he says this. Grunting when a soft thud sounds from somewhere away from you.

“You mean it didn’t break? I thought you said you already knotted her.”

It’s Hansol’s voice this time. His tone is curious if anything else but you can’t focus when a familiar heat is starting to creep up your stomach again. 

“Clearly not. This is different from before somehow. She’s in more stress than I thought,” Joshua is the one to pipe up this time. He sounds just as tired as Seungcheol- maybe even more and it makes you whine; wanting to comfort the omega somehow.

The small sound you made seemed to alert those in the room and there’s faint thuds against the floor before soft fingers card through your hair gently. You hum, pressing closer to the warmth and Jeonghan is the one to coo at you lovingly. He sits on the ground next to your figure on the couch, covered with a blanket and changed in new sets of clothing. 

You’re starting to burn up all over, the unmistakable scent of arousal spreading in the air like a virus; a benefit neither party will taste aside from the sickness itself. You think you understand that there’s no real advantage for you to be going into heat. There’s nothing for you to gain with being like this and it seems as though you’re only troubling your pack members with it. 

The thought makes something painful spread in your stomach but you know it’s the heat so it makes you all the more frustrated when the only source of comfort you can think of is looking at you with such a sad expression. Jeonghan doesn’t move even when you paw at his hand weakly, trying to get him to understand and help you. 

He’s looking at you blankly, fingers tangling in your hair and sliding down in short movements to untangle the knots. He looks like he’s doubting something. Lips pressed in a thin line when you start whining, kicking the blanket away from you when the heat is unbearable. 

“Hyung, you’re not… you’re not going to help her?” Hansol questions weakly, grimacing at the strong smell of arousal in the air but it’s laced with bitter ash. He’s a little doubtful the others in the room can smell anything aside from your heat and something tugs in his chest when you look at Jeonghan as if you’re trying to ask for forgiveness—for the alpha to have mercy and help you. 

It makes Hansol frown, displeased at the events happening. You were supposed to be  _ fine, _ he thinks, discontent. A small sigh leaves his lips but he says nothing else, trusting Joshua to handle everything that’s happening and leaving the room so his scent doesn’t bother you, because he can feel his mood souring. The beta sends a quick text to Seungkwan before he’s grabbing his jacket and leaving the apartment. 

Jeonghan, unbothered and unmoving, is looking at you shake. He watches the way your fingers are starting to tremble when you clutch at the t-shirt you’re wearing, shorts already discarded. You don’t look at him anymore, avoiding his eyes in favor of shedding your clothing to reduce the heat spreading in your body. 

“Hannie,” Seungcheol calls, tone firm and Jeonghan snaps his head back at the commanding tone. He thinks it wasn’t the first time he was called so the younger alpha bares his neck in submission as a form of apology. 

Seungcheol grunts, dismissing the action and gesturing for Jeonghan to come closer where he is with Joshua next to him. Jeonghan leaves his spot on the ground and you whine brokenly, scratching at the cushions under you but Jeonghan can’t bring himself to pay attention when his lead alpha is calling for him. He leaves you after shedding his jacket and you cling to it as if it’s the last piece of him you’ll ever hold. 

He stands in the far corner of the room with the two leads of the pack, far away from where you’re trembling on the couch. “I can’t say for certain the type of heat she’s going through but… Seokmin said it’s more like stress heat. Different from the usual ones but similar.” Joshua starts, voice quiet and his eyes snap to you when you sob. Jeonghan thinks the omega would have sprinted to you if not for the hold of the leader on him. 

“How is it different? This isn’t stress heat, Joshua. That’s when you’re under too much pressure and no source of comfort is available. She’s surrounded by  _ us. _ That should be enough but it  _ isn’t, _ ” Jeonghan’s voice breaks off in a growl and he quiets down with the warning look Seungcheol gives him. “What the hell is she going through? She was knotted by Seungcheol—our  _ lead alpha _ . How is that not enough to break her heat?” 

Said leader’s hand takes hold of the back of Jeonghan’s neck, a low growl in his throat and Jeonghan lowers his head. “You need to cool your head. We don’t know what the fuck’s going on. Don’t add to the pressure,” Seungcheol eases his grip, sighing and taking hold of Jeonghan’s face in his hands in a much gentler hold. “This is obviously different from what we’re normally prepared for, Hannie. But all we can do is adapt to it and find a way to help her. We promised to take care of the pack— _ especially _ her.” 

The tone is soft and tired; seeping with a fatigue Jeonghan feels he can’t possibly understand what comes as a burden with being the leader. He’s overcome with something warm in his chest and hides the spreading flush on his cheeks with a groan, pulling Seungcheol closer to kiss him. “Fuck you and your sexy leader speech,” he breaths against the other’s lips and feels the way Seungcheol smiles. 

“Alright you two, enough with this. You can take out whatever pent up frustrations on, Y/N,” the two alphas blink, looking at each other and wincing at the high pitched whine that leaves your lips from where you are. They both look at you with a mix of something brewing in their chest before turning to Joshua.

“Meaning?” Seungcheol questions, a sense of something feral slowly creeping up his spine. 

You feel the sudden shift of atmosphere, lifting your head from the pillow you’re trying to suffocate yourself with to look at the trio still not tending to your needs. You can’t think rationally. Your head is still muddled and drowning in heat-space. The burning sensation builds steady fire and your breath becomes increasingly laboured. 

You can still faintly hear the trio discussing but you’re too tired to focus on anything. Somehow perplexed that the three oldest of the pack won’t come and help you. The thought makes you whine pathetically, scratching at the cushions under you again and you press your face into Jeonghan’s jacket to distract your mind.

Joshua is still trying to think of words to explain the situation better but your needy whine and insistent huffs makes him wince, wanting to comfort you and provide all the care he can give. He forces himself to relax and think when Seungcheol’s hands takes hold of his shoulder as if to steady the omega. “I can’t say for certain, but try to deal with this until her heat breaks. That should make things go to normal. Minghao told me he already gave her the shot,” Joshua sighs, his breath is turning more ragged the longer he stays in the room. 

The scent of your heat makes the crippling feeling of want settle in Joshua’s stomach and it threatens to trigger his own heat earlier if he stays in the room any longer. Seungcheol is giving him a worried expression, pushing him to the stairs slowly but Joshua doesn’t move any further. 

“It’s not… the best option—but please knot her as many times as it takes. And be gentle. She can’t… she won’t be able to take it. We need to pull her from heat-space before it gets worse.” Joshua is begging now, his eyes are starting to blur with tears but he refuses to cry when you’re in much deeper pain. “We’ll lose everything we’ve ever worked for. It’ll all be in  _ vain. _ ” 

The omega is looked at fondly. He’s being pulled and he feels the soft press of lips against his eyes from the two alphas. “We won’t let that happen,” Jeonghan assures, pushing Joshua up the stairs and the omega moves reluctantly. “We worked too hard for it to end just from this.” There’s an edge to his voice when he says this, the small growl making you lift your head to look at the trio curiously. 

“Tell Soonyoung and Wonwoo. Mingyu’s with Chan. Tell him not to spend all his stamina today,” Seungcheol chuckles and it makes Jeonghan roll his eyes at the thought of Mingyu currently fucking the youngest omega. Perhaps to not destroy you so early in the morning so Jeonghan doesn’t comment on it.

“Noted. Now go help her. I’ll ask Seokmin more about all this,” Joshua commands, pushing the two to your direction as he escapes up the stairs. 

You’re already looking at them through your lashes from your spot. Wearing Jeonghan’s jacket with nothing else now. There’s a ringing in your ears so you don’t hear the way Jeonghan groans at the sight, coming to you in long strides. Seungcheol is slower than the other alpha, grabbing a chair and pulling it towards you. The lead alpha takes a seat across your figure from where Jeonghan is already grabbing the back of your head pulling you into a kiss. 

You moan, wrapping your arms around Jeonghan’s neck and pulling him as you lay back down. You feel content just from this, purring softly as your fingers card through Jeonghan’s hair. The alpha on top of you is sighing softly, biting his lip and looking at you with a look you’re not familiar with. His brows are furrowed, teeth worrying his bottom lip and his hand glides down your hip but you don’t feel like he’s touching you; reluctant and distracted.

“Hannie,” you whisper softly, grabbing to the edges of consciousness the best you could. “I’m sorry,” you apologise but it makes Jeonghan groan, teeth sinking into your neck and his hands are pushing his jacket over your shoulder to lay you bare for him to indulge in.

“No, don’t apologise, love,” he breaths into your skin, biting down harder and it makes the alpha in him growl when you mewl helplessly. “You didn’t want this. We’re sorry—you must be confused, huh? It’s alright, baby, we’ll take care of you,” he promises sweetly, kissing down your shoulder.

His lips kisses the skin of your breasts, lips wrapped around a hardened nipple and you keen, pushing your chest forward as if you weren’t close enough. Jeonghan’s teeth teases the hardened nub and it makes you writhe when he tugs experimentally. 

A small sigh leaves your lips Jeonghan trails his lips lower, over the valley of your breasts and down, down, down. His lips makes contact over your thigh, trailing there and sucking red decorations over the skin. The alpha stops suddenly, pulling away to look at the slick gushing out of you in steady trails. 

The sight makes something primal in his mind snap free from its restraints but the reasoning behind your arousal is bothering the alpha a lot more than he’d like to show. “You must be in pain,” he murmurs, spreading your arousal over the expense of your inner thigh and you whine, trying to rub your legs together but he’s holding you bare. 

A sigh, and the alpha frees his half-hard cock from the confines of his sweatpants, fisting himself to hardness. It doesn’t take long for him to get painfully hard, the oxygen leaving his lungs as Jeonghan pulls you to the edge of the couch. You’re quiet, pliant in his arms and moaning softly when feeling the head of Jeonghan’s cock rubs against your heat. 

The head of his cock dips in and out, not pushing through and you’re growing frustrated from the denied pleasure. The knot in your stomach is coiling in a death grip and you’re grabbing onto Jeonghan’s arm to force him to move but the alpha doesn’t comply. 

“Ngh, Hannie, please,” you groan, fisting the alpha’s shirt and stretching the material as you pull on it. 

He doesn’t move any closer despite that, taking off the shirt smoothly. His thumb brushes over your nipple again but you’re not satiated from just that. 

“Do you want Cheolie to look, love?” 

The sudden question makes you freeze. Looking at the alpha like a deer in headlights but there’s no expression on his face that says he’s teasing. He asks again, pinching your nipple and rolling the bud, “Do you want our lead alpha to see? Our baby being taken care of—stuffed full and knotted,” he breathes, groaning when the head of his cock finally sinks in but he stays there, not moving an inch deeper. 

His eyes stare deep into yours, forcing you to only focus on him. “I’ll knot you all day if it’ll help you. Would you like that, baby? Do you want to take my knot?” 

There’s a fire burning brighter inside you. It’s a hot, searing pain that makes your ears ring and head numb but your mind is whispering  _ yes, yes, yes, _ as if you can ever refuse what your alpha offers you. 

“Please,” the coil snaps and you whimper pathetically.

A smirk stretches Jeonghan’s lips and you feel like you’re seriously about to cry; kicking and screaming at the alpha to give you what you want. “Please what, Y/N?” he whispers, biting the lobe of your ear and sucking it into his mouth. You’re bristling, hitting his chest in frustration but the impact is weak with the way your mind is still muddled.

The heat burning inside you doesn’t allow you to fight back. Grunting and moaning weakly in protest as Jeonghan rubs your thigh comfortingly but you want something else from him entirely. Head lowered and blood rushing to your head, you give in to what he wants; a quiet plea leaving your lips, “Want Seungcheol to see- want your knot— _Everything._ _Please,_ give me everything, Hannie.” 

In quick motions, Jeonghan is pulling away from you entirely. He flips you around, pulling you by the hands and maneuvering himself to sit under you as the alpha forces you to stand over his lap. Your arm is held behind you by Jeonghan’s, the alpha pulling you back so you’re flush against him as your legs tremble to keep yourself upright. 

“Do what you want, baby. Let our alpha see,” you’re reminded of why you’re in this position now, hovering over Jeonghan’s dick, back to him so you can face the leader sitting across from you. 

Your cheeks are flushed; blood rushing to your face and heat spreading through your body. You’re horribly exposed like this; hiding nothing from Seungcheol and anyone who decides to enter the living room. 

The lead alpha sits leg crossed over the other, his hands settled across his chest and he’s looking at you impassively as if waiting for your next move. You don’t do anything. Staring at the leader in front of you and you feel yourself shrink, embarrassed and showing submission. 

All too soon Jeonghan is forcing you to move again, slowly sinking you down on his cock and you’re distracted by the sudden feeling of being filled. Jeonghan lets gravity do the rest as you squirm on his lap, leaning back against the couch and watching you try to get a grip of yourself.

Jeonghan’s cock effortlessly kisses your cervix in this position. Impossibly large and stuffed full into your pussy but you feel like it belongs there, your weight sinking you down further and dragging delicious friction against your walls. 

The alpha inside you doesn’t move, letting you adjust and set your own pace. He’s smoothing his hands down your back comfortingly, tilting his head to see the way Seungcheol’s eyes watches every movement you make on the younger’s lap. 

It’s after another few minutes that you lift yourself up slightly, moving down once again in timid motions and a small moan leaves your lips. Jeonghan feels you clenching down harder as if your small movements are enough to get you off. The alpha rolls his hips up, experimentally, and a broken whine escapes you before you’re shuddering violently, clutching his legs as if to still his movements. 

Jeonghan tilts his head again, looking at Seungcheol but this time a hesitant look in his eyes. His mind is going through all the memories of you in the last month. You look absolutely fine; behaving how you normally would but somehow, this week had taken you to a much darker road your pack can’t light for you. 

It makes ugly emotions well up in his heart. Stomach churning in tight knots of silent rage. He was able to hold off from leaving the apartment and killing the bastard the night the elevator incident took place. He can’t think of that now—you’re in heat. Something much worse than stress heat and it frustrates Jeonghan to know that your pack isn’t able to pull you out of this. 

It ruins everything they’ve ever worked for. How are they supposed to be the perfect pack for you if they can’t even pull you out of heat-space? 

A sudden wave of pleasure washes the thoughts from his mind and back to you. You’re moving up and down at a fast, steady pace now; using Jeonghan’s legs as leverage. Seungcheol kneels in front of you, murmuring soft words of encouragement and you moan, picking up pace with each word uttered. 

_ That’s it, baby, you’re being so good, _ Seungcheol is praising softly, pressing sweet kisses to your face and you lean forward to catch his lips, not stopping your movements. Jeonghan is starting to pant shallowly under you, grabbing hold of your hips to ground himself and not buck up into your heat lest he wants to hurt you.

You’re crying now, forcing yourself to move, make the alpha inside you happy and reach his high. You can’t bring yourself to think of anything else. Wanting nothing but Jeonghan’s knot tying you to him and you come with a high pitched moan, writhing in the alpha’s lap but your hips are still moving. Grinding, shaking, clenching, anything to make the alpha inside you reach his high faster.

You’re shaking in soft jolts of electricity now. The familiar feeling of overstimulation makes you sob harder and Seungcheol is holding you steady; cupping your face and praising you as if you’re the reason the stars exist. The breath from your lungs is stolen by the familiar swell stretching you wider. 

Jeonghan’s knot expands and locks you to him just as you feel the gush of his sperm filling you whole. The feeling of his knot makes the tears spill from your eyes in heavier streams, taking the feeling of being filled to the brink of bursting. You’re taking a deep breath to calm yourself, head fuzzy and feeling nothing but Jeonghan inside you.

It takes you a moment before realising Seungcheol’s warm palm pressed to your neck, smoothing over the skin and rubbing over your pack mark lightly. You shudder at the feeling, leaning towards his touches and closing your eyes in bliss. 

“Y/N? Tell me how you feel, baby,” Seungcheol’s voice is laced with anxiety. Something you’re not familiar with in his usual powerful aura. He’s looking at you much like he looked at Seungkwan when the younger beta had come home one night from school littered with bruises. He’s looking at you as if he risks losing you if he looks away.

There’s a…. twisting feeling in your gut. Different from the coil of heat settled there previously but it’s familiar. A feeling laced with prickly thorns, coated with piles of ash and surrounded by decaying flesh. It’s an ugly feeling—perhaps even worse than that. 

Because it makes your mind race with nothing but doubt. 

Doubt for your alpha, doubt for your pack. Your whole existence, it’s filled with nothing but doubt. 

You can’t bring your mind to will the thoughts to go away. Any form of mental defense crumbling into pieces of rubble and all you see is the red flashes of sharp canines and piercing eyes.  _ You’re mine, _ it whispers menacingly. A soft warning only you can hear and directed at no one but you. You’re not safe. Not from those eyes.

“Y/N, I need you to calm down, baby,” it’s Jeonghan’s voice who pulls you to the surface. You don’t notice when he’s already pulled a shirt over both of your figures but he’s pulling you back to lean against him. 

The feeling of his cock shifting inside you makes you moan, a painful edge in your voice from the sudden movement and Jeonghan grunts quietly as if he’s taking a blunt force your cries of pain emits. 

“Tell us what’s wrong. What were you doing before you went into heat, Y/N? Why are you hurting,” Jeonghan’s voice cracks with every sentence, his arms tightening around you to make you stay or keep him grounded, you’re not sure. “What are we lacking? What can we give you to make you feel at ease?  _ Please, _ tell us—we need to know why this keeps happening-”

“ _ Jeonghan, _ ” the sound of command is familiar in your ears. You shudder, whimpering and dropping your head. Jeonghan’s breath stutters, a low whine in his throat but he says nothing else, hands losing its tight grip around you. 

Seungcheol sighs, gently lifting your chin to make you look at him. His face is void of any emotion you can discern, looking into his eyes to nothing but the fierce look of a lead alpha; all traces of doubt cleared from his face. “Do you think you'll go into heat again, Y/N?” 

You’re not sure how to answer. Your voice won’t leave your throat and you feel as if it never will with the sudden tightness in your chest. So you shake your head weakly, unsure.

Seungcheol slowly retracts his hand from your face and doesn’t say anything when you lean back against Jeonghan, away from him. “We’ll keep the other alphas with you just in case. Clean up and get some rest. But before that,” the lead alpha sighs, rubbing a hand down his face in an attempt to ease the tension on his brow. “I want you to answer Jeonghan’s question, love. What did you do before going into heat?”

The lead alpha is well aware of what happened—you had told him before you were only sleeping when he was the one to help you but the alpha is doubtful of the thoughts running through your mind to have made you so restless. He has his suspicion but the situation demanded him to help you rather than focus on the cause of your inner turmoil. 

Now you’re looking at him in a much clearer light, pulled from a heat riddled mind but the lead alpha isn’t sure when your sudden heat will return so he’s rushing to find out. 

You’re silent for a while, avoiding the eyes of the two alpha looking at you expectantly. Jeonghan is soothing you with soft touches, his knot slowly deflating and letting the mixture of cum ooze down your legs. The feeling makes you grimace but you’re trying to focus on a matter much more troubling than this.

“I…” you start slowly, unsure what words to choose that’s able to describe your thoughts exactly before remembering a small detail. “Minghao, he.. He gave me a shot- of something before I fell asleep.” The sudden memory makes you more alert somehow, remembering the small ache and dried blood on your arm. “It’s.. I don’t know what it’s for. Or why he gave it to me,” your voice trails off the longer you speak, watching Seungcheol’s expression but he doesn’t seem surprised. 

A heavy sigh leaves his lips, head hanged low and shoulders slumping. You’re not able to really focus when Jeonghan is gently pushing you off of him, using his jacket to wipe away the cum that drips down your leg. Your cheeks burns in embarrassment, stealing glances at Seungcheol as Jeonghan cleans you silently. But the lead alpha is still facing the ground, deep in thought. 

It’s when Jeonghan is sliding your shorts up your legs that Seungcheol looks at you again. “That shot,” he starts slowly, looking at your expression to see if you’re focusing on his words. “It’s what was prescribed to you when you first came to us.” His voice is calm when he speaks, delivering a news you’re not familiar with and too sudden to take. 

You don’t understand what he’s saying. 

“We give it to you periodically—a routine we all memorise by heart. Anytime and everytime you’re stressed. The sensitivity is the start. It’s when we know you’re acting up again,” Seungcheol is saying words you can’t understand. An explanation of something too complex for your mind to make sense of. “We can’t tell you what it is- not yet. But we want you to feel better, Y/N. That’s why we give you the shot. That’s why Joshua asks for regular visits to the hospital and that’s why Seokmin asks you to write an essay about your feelings every month. We do this  _ because we love you _ and we want you to feel like you’re at home; that this is where you belong.”

Seungcheol takes your hands in his, squeezing gently when you start to tremble just the slightest bit. Something wet is sliding down your face but you can’t focus on that. Seungcheol continues weakly, wiping away the tears from your eyes, “We’re sorry we couldn’t be more honest with you, Y/N. But please understand this is all for you. We were told you would be under too much pressure if you knew the truth.”

You nod slowly, wiping your eyes to rid of the tears and you let Seungcheol pull you into his arms. You breath slowly, a warm feeling spreads in your chest but it doesn’t touch the edges of your mind, something cold and distant still remains there. You can’t bring yourself to ask what the flash of something unfamiliar flickers in Seungcheol’s eyes was as he tells you everything. 

The distant thought of  _ when _ was the first time you were brought to them. And how everything settled to where you are now. You’re not sure what they all mean.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i swear i didn't plan for this whole heat thing and just—i'm sorry i can't with myself  
> i promise there's more plot here than i'm giving alkjsdhsjkd


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Then it’s a dead end.

You’re sitting in the tub. Knees to your chest and eyes dropping slightly. The faint smell of rosemary mint surrounds you in the form of bubbles, floating on the surface of warm water. 

Minghao is washing your hair silently. Gently massaging your scalp with soft pressure and you think he’s the main reason you’re getting sleepier by the minute and not from the whole escapade the morning had slapped you with. 

You don’t really want to think about it. 

His hand moves down to your neck, gathering your hair and keeping it in place with the foamy substance of soap on your hair. Gentle fingers press down on your stiffness, trailing down to the juncture of your neck and shoulder and you groan softly when feeling the tension gradually melt away by the omega’s hands. 

He’s silent as he tends to you. Easing your tension like he always does with soft touches and warm caresses. Minghao is the type of person to love silently. He doesn’t need to shout to the world of proclaiming his affections when his whole world revolves around his pack. He’s silent when showing love as he is with kindness; not needing to boast about his good deeds because he doesn’t need to be praised for an act only befitting of such a gentle person. 

He’s silent, that is until he isn’t. 

An obvious feat, but Minghao breaks under silent pressure; preferring to be honest and headstrong. He doesn’t show weakness but at times when it’s too much, you can see the well polished surface of his soul crack slightly; no longer covered by dark curtains and bare for you to see. 

“I’m sorry,” he whispers, faint and it almost slips your ears with how distracted your mind is by his soft touches. His fingers don’t stop their ministrations and you almost dismiss the words as your own imagination but you can feel the way his breath stutters behind you. 

You crane your neck, moving your body slightly to face him better but Minghao’s gaze is casted downwards. He doesn’t look at you and stares at his wet hands, covered by shampoo and bubbles. 

You feel something tug at your heart at the sad expression he’s making. Reaching out a hand, drops of water lands on his shirt and jeans when you slide a finger down his cheek. He looks at you then, and you’re smiling at him. 

You place your hands on the edge of the bathtub, resting your chin on the back of your hands and you look up at him. “I’m sure you only did it because you were told to. Seungcheol already told me why but honestly? I would have prefered if you used a better excuse than a mosquito bite,” your nose scrunches, a teasing smile on your lips and Minghao laughs softly at that. 

He shakes his head slightly, rubbing away the wetness on his cheek from your finger. “If I’m allowed to defend myself, I couldn’t get a clear shot because I was suffocated by your breasts-” he gasps, mouth gaped in shock when you splash him lightly and duck your head as if he would unleash a counterattack on the spot from your assault. “What was that for?” he asks instead, hiding a blooming smile by shaking his head and rolling his eyes. 

“That’s not even a good enough defense! If I recall correctly,  _ you _ were the one who so willingly suffocated yourself in my- breasts.” You wheeze, moving back when the omega  _ does _ unleash a counterattack by dumping water on your head. 

Your hair falls over your face, shampoo drizzling down but the water wasn't enough to wash everything so you whine at the sudden temporary restriction of your sight before another wave of water is being poured on you. It then continues in soft streams of the shower on your head until you’re able to open your eyes again, hair now free of the soapy bubbles of shampoo and Minghao looks absolutely proud at being able to save his dignity and wash you at the same time. 

_ Sly,  _ you whisper loudly, moving away from Minghao as if you don’t want him to hear but the omega smiles, shoulders a little less slouched now. He wordlessly turns to water off, letting you soak up in the bath as he sits on the stool again.

He’s lacing his hands together, clenching and unclenching his fingers as he looks at you. 

“But really,” he starts, and you blink at him in surprise, not expecting him to talk again. “I really am sorry. You weren’t supposed to know yet—I’m sorry if you feel more stressed by the sudden news. I promise to take better care of you. So you won’t have anything to worry about,” the words are said with a gentle warmth in them. As if he’s promising his service to a greater cause than his life and something in you is spreading, warm and burning with a renowned passion for all the affection you’re receiving. 

You feel like you really  _ will _ fight an army for him. 

Minghao clears his throat, avoiding your eyes again but this time, a dark flush settles on his face and your smile widens at the endearing sight. “Anyway- Seungkwan came home already so he’ll probably be the one to change your bandages and take care of you today. And Shua-hyung said he postponed your doctor’s visit to some time this week.” The male explains, gathering the bottles on the floor and placing them back on the cupboards by the sink. 

You frown at the news, brows furrowing and you sink back on the bath a little. “But… what about work? I asked for a day off only for today.” You think you already know the answer to the change of your work schedule but it doesn’t make you happy when Minghao gives you a small smile, confirming your suspicions. 

“Seungcheol-hyung already put you on paid leave until Shua-hyung or Seokmin decides you’re up and ready to get back. Jun-hyung will be covering for you while you’re away,” the brief explanation makes your stomach churn unpleasantly, wondering how fast everyone had already planned this to drag out. You offer Minghao a smile nonetheless, nodding your head. 

He takes that as his cue to leave, stepping out of the bathroom once you let go of him after pressing a kiss to his lips. It’s quiet after that. The small sound of water sloshing as you move to get a more comfortable position the only thing visible to your ears. The water is tuning lukewarm now, not to the point of unbearable coldness but not letting out comfortable steams either. You don’t really mind though.   


You sink down until the water touches your chin slightly, head leaned back on the small headrest of the tub. Your fingers trace the faint markings on your injured wrist under the water, almost healed and fading but the colour is still twisted in ugly purple markings of rough fingers. You can’t help but feel curious why it happened.

It was too sudden to be planned but it was too strange to be a spur of the moment decision. You think you remember how… scared..? How scared the alpha seemed when he was looking at you. His mood wasn’t in the best spirits but.. pulling you back as if he was nervous about something; anxious. As if he had been cornered by something and there was—

“Noona, you’ll drown,”

Seungkwan chastises lightly, face furrowed and a frown on his face. You blink, lifting your shoulders slightly so you’re sitting back against the tub. You didn’t hear him come in, you think as the beta makes his way to sit on the stool right by where you are. 

“Do you not have class today?” You question curiously, coming closer to the edge of the tub and holding your hand out to him. The frown is still on his face but Seungkwan looks more bothered by something than he is dissatisfied. “Kwannie?”

He takes your hand, rubbing his wrists on your palm and you frown at the gesture. If Seungkwan intends to scent you then you don’t comment on how his scent won’t stick to you with the water on your skin. He seems to be doing it to calm himself rather than you, fingers rubbing on your wrists insistently. 

You watch the way his brows furrow, teeth worrying on his bottom lip and the skin on your hands are turning an irritated colour by the rough frictions. “Kwannie, it’s okay. I’m fine—Noona’s fine. Please calm down a little,” you’re becoming restless the longer he’s attempting to scent you, pulling your hands back slightly and that seems to snap the younger omega out of his reverie. 

He coils away from you as if you’ve burned him, mouth slightly agape in shock before he’s snapping his eyes to you. “Sorry,” he breathes, hasty and cautious. “I got… You looked like- like you  _ will _ drown and I won’t be able to pull you back up,” his voice breaks off in ways you’re not familiar with when thinking of him. 

Seungkwan, bright and optimistic, taking his role as a beta to a fault; always comforting others but can’t comfort himself. It’s the first you’ve seen him this worried about something so openly. Your hand reaches out to him again, water going over the edge at your jostled movements and you coo at the younger boy lovingly. 

“Kwannie, baby, of course not.” Your voice is firm, no room for argument and Seungkwan takes your hands despite seeming as if he wants to run away. “Even if I drown I’m sure you’ll be able to breath life back into me,” your nose scrunches, cringing internally but you find yourself smiling brightly when Seungkwan cringes; the beginning of a smile on his face. “I’m fine. At least for now, that is. So for now just—don’t worry.”

The reassurance seems to make his shoulders relax, a deep sigh leaving his lips. His thumb rubs over the skin where he previously attempted to scent you and the dark markings of your bruises. He frowns at them both but a small smile fits on his lips when he looks at your face again. 

“If the reason you’re always stressed is because of work, I’m making Seungcheol-hyung resign you,” he jokes—at least you think he is because Seungkwan has amazing persuasion skills and you’re slightly worried. “You deserve to live an easy life.” He whispers, an edge to his voice you think wasn’t meant for your ears.

You squeeze his fingers lightly, feeling the way he returns the gesture and you pull him a bit closer. The water is slightly cold now, goosebumps rising in your skin as you press closer to the edge of the tub. It’s as if you can’t get any closer to him; hands cupping his cheeks, wet and cold. Separated by the small edge of the tub that feels much taller than what it is. 

Seungkwan’s smile is contagious and you find yourself grinning; giggling softly along with the younger beta. He’s leaning his head against yours, foreheads pressed together and whispering words that makes you giggle. 

You’re on the beginnings of a juicy gossip before a loud knock by the door startles the both of you. Seungkwan frowns, glaring at the source of disturbance and Mingyu leans against the opened bathroom door, hands across his chest. “Sorry,” he grins, charming yet his eyes are shining with a teasing lilt. “Am I disturbing anything?”

Seungkwan rolls his eyes, turning to you and turning on the drain. “Your very existence is disturbing everything,” he mocks, grabbing a towel and slinging it over his shoulder. He helps you up, washing away the bubbles that stick to you with the shower before he’s wrapping the large towel over you. The beta lets you dry yourself, walking briskly to Mingyu and pushing him out the door. “Out, out, shoo! Wait in the bedroom- or at least grab her some clothes.” 

The alpha groans, draping his weight against the younger male before he’s rolling his eyes and trudging to your room. Seungkwan rushes to you again when you step out of the baths, holding on to your arms as if you were a small child needing help for the smallest of things. 

“I’m fine, Seungkwan,” You sigh, letting the male usher you to his bed. The sudden feel of plush bedding under you makes you think what the purpose of the bathroom down the corridor was for if every room had their own private bathrooms. Then again, it  _ was _ pretty convenient if one person hogged one all morning… 

“I’ll get some new bandages,” The beta murmurs, ignoring your words and he leaves the room soon enough. 

You’re getting comfortable on the large mattress before Mingyu enters the room again, your clothes in his hands. He looks awfully confused for some reason, wide eyed and blinking. “I couldn’t find your usual sweater for some reason. Is it in the wash?” He places your arrangement of t-shirt and sweatpants by your side, undergarments folded neatly between the sweatpants. 

“I think I took it to work so it’s probably there,” You explain, patting down the towel on your arms for excess water before slowly grabbing your underwear. 

Mingyu swipes the material from your hands swiftly, beckoning you to lift your legs from the bed so he can slide them on. “Here, let me,” He slides the material up your calves, past your thigh and you lift your butt briefly to let Mingyu situate the undergarment securely on your hips. He does all this slowly, pressing himself close to you and practically caging you in his arms as he dresses you.

You’re blinking, not really protesting as you let the young alpha slide your bra straps over your forearm. You stare at the side of his face as Mingyu pulls you to him to look over your shoulder. His fingers glide over the skin of your sides, barely brushing the undersides of your breasts to grab to hooks of your bra. In an amazing display of slow motion. Mingyu clips your bra over your back, kissing your neck before he’s pulling away, a wide smile on his lips. 

A pillow is suddenly assaulting the alpha’s head and you watch as Seungkwan bristles angrily as Mingyu laughs and collapses on Seokmin’s bed near the door, a bit further from where you are. Sungkwan huffs loudly, throwing his weapon to Mingyu who hugs it close to him. 

The beta rolls, his eyes, sitting next to you as you continue to dress yourself. Once your pants are tied securely, the younger male takes your bruised wrist, assessing the damage left. “Does it still hurt?” The colour of your skin is no longer painted in dark brusings, returning to their original colour. 

“It wasn’t hurting as much to begin with. I’ll live without the bandages,” You assure, patting his head lightly.

Seungkwan nods, putting away the first aid kit. He offers you your phone before turning away to collapse on Hansol’s bed since you were occupying his.

The screen of your phone is filled with notifications. Majority being spam or adds; no new emails concerning work but you did receive an email from Jun replying to your asked leave with an emoji and well wishes for you to get better.

Time for you to get your thoughts together. There’s a small, invisible timeline in your head. Connected with thin threads that spreads all over the place in messy tanglements. It starts with what Seunghceol told you a few hours ago. Backtracking to your sudden heat and back again. Your thoughts are going on reverse to try and remember what little detail there is.

It all stops in the same spot. Breaking off only to come back with the same blockage of something large and thick, as if not allowing you to even touch the deepest roots of your memory. 

You think Seungkwan might be sleeping, a quick glance confirming your suspicions and another one to Mingyu who’s on his side facing away from you. You can’t see what he’s doing. 

Opening your phone again, you scroll through your gallery to the oldest photos the phone held. It’s a picture of an open field. The date going back to seven months ago. It… wasn’t much to jog your memory but you think you have a start. You feel like you received the phone exactly seven months ago just as the date had suggested the photo to be. The next one is a photo of Hansol and you in said open field. 

It’s quite uncertain but you rule out the picture to be from a trip seven months ago, memory fuzzy of something you went to within the year. How is your memory so bad? A side effect of the medicine you’ve been taking…

You’re jotting down whatever information you can take from the pictures in your note; going back and forth to type down the date and events you can discern from the photos alone. Most of it are pictures of your work, saved slogans or unfinished designs saved in your phone—you can’t even remember if you designed them yourself or not. 

You’re starting to see a pattern. Each month new pictures of an outing with the pack fills the rows of your gallery. There’s exactly four to five pictures from the outing on your phone. No more no less than the ones you’ve counted for each month. You’re not sure if this means something or if your past-self really does not enjoy the art of photography—though the latter is a probability. 

_ I’m looking too much into it, _ you conclude. The note you’ve arranged is filled with question marks; a reflection of the state of mind you’re in. 

There’s a small  _ ding _ in your mind and your eyes widen at the sudden realisation- or idea, but you’re quickly typing in your company website. Scrolling past whatever advertisement or article the website offers, you punch in your Employee ID and turn to the list of employees currently working. 

The page is filled with other workers’ profiles, your own in between the many profiles on the site. You’re scrolling almost vigorously, paying attention to the male alphas displayed before moving on to the next picture. 

Nothing. 

You can’t remember clearly what your… assailant’s face was like but you have an inkling feeling that seeing his face—or profile would jog your memory a bit. 

It’s on the third slide when you finally give up. Closing the tab and concluding that perhaps the male you’re looking for isn’t in your branch at all. You can’t access any other profile from other branches since your identification would be different from other divisions. 

Then it’s a dead end. 

You huff back onto the pillows, hair semi-dry now. Seungkwan is already buried under the covers and Mingyu is no longer in his previous spot. You didn’t even notice him leave. 

It’s when you’re deep in thought, spacing out and thinking of too many things simultaneously when a familiar ache settles in your belly. “Fuck,” you whimper, stretching your shirt collar to release the heat slowly spreading through your whole body. 

It doesn’t make sense to you how a heat can repeat itself despite normally ‘breaking’ when being knotted. You’ve been knotted twice yet it wasn’t enough somehow… 

You really don’t think you’ll be able to handle being knotted for a third time in such a short time span. As quietly as you can, legs shaky and stumbling in your attempts to stand up, you shuffle out of the beta room and down the hall to the omega room. 

Your chest is starting to burn, a searing, hot pain dragging over your lungs and you feel yourself starting to drip with slick. It’s with great difficulty that you finally manage to turn the knob to the room, tripping over the carpeting into the large space. 

A gasp faintly enters your mind when you manage to take three, four steps before collapsing by the edge of a bed. You’re drenched in sweat, the overwhelming feeling of emptiness making your beta cry painfully. There’s a small ache on your injured wrist when you put pressure on your hand to stand up. 

It’s when your eyes are blurred with tears and face pressed against the bed you’re holding on to (the smell of Jihoon filling your mind) do you feel hands scoop you up. Joshua shushes you softly, rocking you in his arms as he sits on a bed (you weren’t even sure who it belonged to anymore).

“Why are you up, Y/N? Where’s Mingyu?” A heat is rising up Joshua’s stomach the longer he holds on to you but he can’t bring himself to let go when you scratch at his shirt weakly. 

You shiver when Joshua’s fingers rub the skin under your shirt, fingers cool against your burning skin. It snaps you back for a moment, blinking up at Joshua’s face. “Give me a shot,” you plead, pressing your core down on his thigh when a stronger wave of want hits you. It makes Joshua tense before he’s shuddering, face flushed a similar colour to yours. “Suppressants. Please, Shua, it hurts.” 

The sound of your whimpers makes Joshua frown, brows creased in worry as he wipes away the stray tears falling from your eyes. “That’s… we don’t have ones that deal with beta heats, Y/N. You’ll only feel worse if you take suppressants designed for omegas.” He explains softly, placing his hand on your hip to stop your grinding on his leg.

You whine, squirming now in an attempt to break free of his hold. “Please,  _ I can’t. _ I don’t want to be knotted again. Please, Shua,  _ it hurts. _ I want to stop hurting,” you trash in his hold, pushing and scratching with little strength when it feels as though you could only beg. 

Joshua’s face twists painfully, hands tightening their hold on you. He lets you go when a broken sob leaves your lips and you push away from him but you don’t get off the bed. Joshua watches the way your head falls on his knee, fingers scratching the bed under him and your hips raised in the air slightly. 

“Shua, please,” you plead again, rubbing your cheek against the fabric of his pants. The action only makes Joshua more nervous. The omega letting out a shaky breath and patting your head comfortingly.

“I can’t do that, Y/N. You know that.” His voice is firm and it makes you whimper, biting back whatever form of complaint or begging because your lead omega says so.

It’s when a different set of hands gently pull you away from the omega’s lap do you quiet down. Seungkwan holds you by the shoulders gently, kissing the side of your head as his hands rub the skin under your shirt. “Mingyu-hyung’s on the phone with Wonwoo-hyung,” is all you can make out from Seungkwan’s rambling. 

The younger beta makes a cocoon out of your and the blankets in the room, providing you with whatever article of clothing or fabrics you need to start nesting. You didn’t even think of making one before. Shaking in the confines of your small cocoon, you huddle in a small ball in the middle of the bed.

Seungkwan is saying something to Joshua, the conversation no longer coherent to your ears as your body heats up. You’re biting your lips harshly, suppressing any sounds of whimper and hugging your body close as if it would help ease your pain. 

“Noona,” Seungkwan calls softly, priding the blankets away from your face and you blink up at him. “I have beta suppressants. They’re not strong and won’t take effect immediately. Do you still want them?” 

You think you’ll take anything at this point. “Yes,” the sound is hoarse and dry. You swallow the lump in your throat. “Please.” Seungkwan says nothing else, briskly leaving the room to get your sought out medicine.

Joshua sits in his own bed, far in the corner and away from you. He’s breathing heavily, clutching his shirt and you watch the way his body trembles just the slightest bit. “Shua,” you call, a small whisper. “Joshua,” this time it’s a lot harsher and the omega snaps his head to you, face flushed and sweating. “Take some suppressants. You’ll get affected by my scent.” It’s a miracle for you to be talking right now, you think. 

Joshua nods his shortly, moving to grab the small tablets in his bedside table and you’re silent as he swallows two pills in one go. The omega calms down after that, hugging his pillow to ground himself. 

“How come you’re not at work?” The sudden question seemed to surprise the male. He blinks owlishly as he looks at you, as if he’s never seen something of your kind before. 

Joshua visibly hesitates, hugging his pillow tighter and scenting the fabric. “Your appointment was today. I canceled everything because of that.” He’s speaking with caution, watching the heat slowly pull you away from reality as his mind sobers, the suppressants taking place.

You nod, burrowing yourself deeper in your small nest. “I want to ask you something,” You breath, voice seeping with fatigue and faint in the omega’s ears. He’s not sure how you’re still conscious. 

“We go on trips each month. Why? And where?” You continue. Joshua can’t focus on your question. He sits quietly, watching the steady rise and fall of your chest. It’s as if you were never in heat—just tired and needing sleep. 

The sound of Seungkwan’s footsteps pulls Joshua’s attention on you to the beta entering the room. A small pack of suppressants is in his hand. Seungkwan gently maneuvers you in a sitting position, giving you two small tablets and it’s with a bit of struggle do you manage to swallow them with the glass of water the younger beta offers. 

“How long will they take effect?” Joshua finds himself asking. You lay back down on the bed, your head on Seungkwan's lap as the younger caresses your head comfortingly. 

“A while, probably. They’re not strong since she was given… that the other night. It’ll take a while.” Seungkwan explains, face scrunching in distaste. He never really liked the shots you were given. It made you...difficult. To an extent.

“The medicine won’t last that long, Seungkwan. It’s just for a moment. You know that,” Joshua explains softly, grabbing his phone to update Seungcheol who had gone to the office that afternoon. 

Seungkwan visibly scowls. “Those shots are the reason she’s like this. I told you we should have-”

Joshua growls, sitting up and glaring at the beta. “ _ Don’t _ finish that sentence. That option was crossed out a long time ago,” his jaw clenches, anger slowly creeping up his spine but Seungkwan doesn’t back down.

“Then  _ this _ is better? Before we know it she’ll forget about us!” Seungkwan nearly shouts, uncaring of the commotion he’s causing. He glances down at you when feeling the weak jab to his side. 

You glare at him angrily. It’s an unspoken rule to never raise your voice against a lead pack member be it alpha or omega. “Apologise. Don’t talk as if I’m not here,” you jab his side again for good measure and the younger beta grunts. 

He moves away from you, coming closer to Joshua who looks more level headed than before. He kneels on the ground next to the bed, hanging his head low to bare his pack mark. 

Joshua says nothing, patting his head in acceptance to the apology and he leans closer to the beta’s ears. You can’t hear what he says, once again drifting between reality and heat-space, blinking your eyes to keep focus. 

You watch Seungkwan lift his head immediately at Joshua’s words. You can’t see the expression he’s making. 

There’s a knock on the door. The familiar rich scent of earthy musk, tinged with sweetness. You’re instantly whining, plunged into heat-space by the sudden smell of alpha entering the room. Your body is shaking uncontrollably, breath ragged. 

Mingyu doesn’t say anything else. He takes quick strides to where you are. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> there's no smut here i'm so proud :"D


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mingyu hums, though the sound wasn’t one to answer you; more as though he’s heard you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i promised you more plot and i'm not gonna give you any *finger guns* (i'm just kidding, i promise there is plot)  
> this chapter is just. full on smut. i don't know how it happened or why i wrote it but.. why did i.. write mingyu's character like this ._. he's sexy tho haha but why...  
> i hope you'll enjoy it nonetheless!

There are instances where you feel like drowning. That seems to be the only thing your memory will allow you to remember; the feeling of being under something. It’s suffocating but you can still breath. 

This time, it’s different.

There is no liquid filling your lungs, You can’t breathe properly but you’re not drowning. It’s a burning pain spreading in your lungs. Your breath is ragged, short and too fast to be considered a proper intake of oxygen. 

Your fingers are clutching the material of the alpha’s shirt _ —your alpha  _ and the thought alone makes a small whimper leave your lips. Mingyu is gentle when he pries you from your nest. You abandon it immediately, mind and body preferring the alpha’s touch than anything else. 

_ The suppressants aren’t working, _ your mind whispers as you rub your cheeks helplessly on Mingyu’s shoulder. The alpha is uncharacteristically silent. No words uttered and he doesn’t move to push you away or bring you comfort; he’s absolutely still as he lets you cling to him. 

You have an idea of what he wants—what he usually demands in times like this. You’ve seen it happen before when he’s helping the omegas during heats and you’ve experienced it yourself but you feel too embarrassed to possibly comply with his wishes; your mind sobering at the thought of the alpha’s silent demands. 

As if sensing the inner conflict in your mind, Mingyu finally,  _ finally, _ with slow motions, touches you. His hands are big and colloused as he wraps his arms around you, pulling you closer. You barely sit on his lap. Body pulled to his chest while your legs are still on the bed. 

“Tell me what you want,” he whispers in your ear, taking the lobe into his mouth and sucking on the skin softly. You shudder at the sensation, gasping, and it feels like the fire in your lungs are spreading. 

Mingyu’s hands travel down your back and into your pants, one hand pulling on the fabric while the other slips in. His fingers tease the waistband of your panties, pulling the straps and snapping it back against your skin. 

The small contact on your skin spreads in electric tingles; as if relief is provided from the small action. Mingyu moves down to your neck, a mess of teeth and tongue marking the skin in darker colours. You think you’ll faint. It’s a whole different feeling than anything you’ve felt since your sudden heat.

Your pack alpha had been so kind to you; Seungcheol providing you with everything you wanted without needing you to utter a single word. Jeonghan had been less kind but he had complied well with your wishes; letting you set your own pace and adjusting to your needs.

Mingyu is a different story. His fingers are rough when they trail the skin under your shirt, undoing the clasps of your bra he had hooked himself previously. He has little mercy. So kind and loving but he desires something from you in accordance to the mercy he’ll provide to your needs.

Your only option is to beg.

“Mingyu,” your lungs are burning. “Alpha, please, I need- y- your help.  _ Please,” _ a soft pinch to your side is what you recieve. You flinch at the sudden sting, blinking up at Mingyu in confusion.

He’s smiling. The look he gives you is akin to looking at a fleeting moment of warmth. It’s such a gentle expression you feel like you’ll burst into tears by being at the receiving end of his gaze. He only ever gives you such saccharine eyes.

“Alright,” his hand tugs the strings of your sweatpants, voice dripping with thick honey as he does this. “Do you want to move to a different room?” 

There’s a faint noise of protest and you jump a little at the question. Your eyes flicker to the bed by the corner; Joshua’s bed, where the omega himself and Seungkwan is looking solely at you. They watch the way Mingyu slides your pants down, throwing the cotton away. 

Your mouth gapes a little, switching between looking at Mingyu and the pair. Mingyu doesn’t make a move to do anything else—waiting for your response as his fingers rub circular motions on your hips. 

There’s a lump in your throat. Seungkwan tilts his head, leaning on Joshua’s knees from his spot on the floor but he doesn’t look away from you. Joshua looks anxious if anything else; nervous yet anticipating your answer. The omega bites his lip softly, fingers unconsciously carding through Seungkwan’s hair and the beta lets out a soft purr.

“Talk to me, baby. Tell us what you want,” Mingyu’s lips leave trails of fire down your neck. His fingers are riding up your torso and your shirt slides along his hands, exposing the skin underneath. The hem of your shirt is placed over your breasts where Mingyu sucks at the supple skin lightly, drawing out a weak moan from you.

Your fingers hold Mingyu’s hair tighty, the alpha unhooking your bra and his lips instantly attach to a nipple, sucking harshly. You’re pushing your chest upwards, keening, when a sweeter scent than your own lures you back to reality.

Joshua whimpers silently, biting his bottom lip to contain the moans slipping from his lips as Seungkwan sits behind him, sucking the omega’s neck. The beta is palming the forming tent on Joshua’s pants, whispering something in the older’s ear that makes him moan.

Mingyu unhooks your bra, sliding the straps off your arms and your shirt over your head. He moves you closer to the edge of the bed as if moving you to get closer to the pair in the room. Your eyes are locked on only them. Watching the way Seungkwan keeps whispering words that makes the omega buck his hips harder into the younger’s palm.

Mingyu sucks on a hardening nipple while his hand plays with the other bud. You’re shivering, moaning at the gentle ministrations of the alpha but your eyes remain distracted. “Can we.. get closer to them?” Your voice is timid, slurred in your clouded mind but Mingyu hums at you understandingly. 

He bites the juncture of your neck and shoulder, drawing out a sharp gasp from you. “Of course,” he murmurs in your ears before lifting you up. Mingyu places you on the bed next to Joshua’s—Chan’s bed—and you reach out a hand to the ones next to you.

It’s Joshua who takes your outstretched fingers, pulling himself to you and placing your index in his mouth. He sucks on the digit, almost shyly, tongue tracing the skin and pulling you deeper in his mouth. Joshua alternates between licking your hand to your wrist and back to sucking your fingers into his mouth.

The feeling of his mouth is hot. Saliva dripping down your skin but Joshua licks it back into his mouth; pressing kisses to your burning skin. Mingyu sits behind you, kissing down your neck and biting your shoulder. The alpha massages your breasts in his hands from behind you, moving down and down your spine with his lips.

“Mingyu..” you whine when the said male nudges his erection against your folds, nothing in between the both of you as Mingyu teases his hard length to your core. You move away slightly, as if to get away from him but the alpha pulls you back by the hips.

There’s a sane part of your mind that’s warning you. Telling you to be careful. You’re already on suppressants and it’s not good to push yourself if they start kicking in while being pounded by the alpha. “Mi- Mingyu, no knots. Do- don’t,  _ mnh, _ don’t knot me, pl- please.” The words are slurred and heavy on your tongue.

Mingyu hums, though the sound wasn’t one to answer you; more as though he’s heard you. “Just let me take care of you, yeah?” He promises instead, pulling you away from Joshua who whines weakly at the loss.

Mingyu places a pillow under you, pushing you down gently so your front is flushed on the bed and hips held up by the pillow under you. Mingyu’s clothes are discarded. He traces patterns on your hips, moving down your thighs before a finger is teasing the wet folds of your heat. 

You shiver at the contact, vaguely aware of the amount of slick you’re producing despite already taking some suppressants. A finger is pushed inside you slowly, drawing a moan as Mingyu kisses your back again. “It’s alright. Just relax for me,” he breaths, allowing you to adjust before sliding in a second digit.

You keen at the feeling, clenching down on the thick fingers. It’s when you start rocking back slightly that Mingyu growls, pushing in a third and you’re writhing. There’s a building tension in your stomach; spreading like floods when Mingyu curls his fingers.

“Ugh- f- fuck, Gyu..” you whine shamelessly, bucking your hips back. Mingyu chuckles softly, his fingers altering between scissoring and beckoning motions; both making you whimper. He starts a gentle pace, pulling his fingers and pushing back in, working you open slowly.

The alpha is aware of how painfully hard he is. The tip of his cock is flushed red and a small bead of precum is already trickling down his length. His mind shifts to where Joshua is and he smirks at the sight; Joshua sucking on Seungkwan’s cock and the latter biting his lip harshly to keep quiet. Your moan draws Mingyu back and he watches the way your hips are lifting to take him in deeper. 

There’s a groan from behind you, Mingyu’s fingers picking up pace and you struggle for breath. The coil tightens, pleasure spreading through your body as you clench on Mingyu’s digits harder as if trying to suck him in. 

The alpha suddenly pulls his fingers out and his cock slams into your pussy before you can make a sound of protest. The sudden impact makes you fall forward. Mingyu’s hand holds you up by the waist, pulling you in time with his thrusts and his cock hits all the right places. The position allows the hard length inside you to hit your g-spot precisely. His large girth rubbing your walls in delicious drags. You feel yourself suffocating with each slap of his pelvis to your ass, the sound loud and ringing in your ears.

“F-  _ fuck, _ so tight- you’re taking me so well,” Mingyu praises, pushing forward until his weight crushes you under him and he’s flushed against your back. The alpha stills, breathing heavily in your ears and you can feel the fullness of his length now. A loud, broken moan spills from your lips when Mingyu moves up and down, still pressed against you and jostling the cock inside you. 

He pulls back before slamming back in at rapid succession. The pace is unrelentless and bruising. Loud, welt squelches of your pussy devouring his cock greedily followed by slaps of skin against skin. Your fingers are clutching the bed sheets tightly, pulling the covers when a sob leaves your lips after the tip of Mingyu’s cock kisses your cervix. He doesn’t stop even when the coil snaps and you come with a loud cry.

The pace is slow this time though the impact is still bruising, being mindful of your sensitivity but he doesn’t stop. Mingyu pulls back slowly only to thrust with enough strength to make sure his cock reaches the deepest parts of you. You gasp with each bruising thrusts, body jolting forward and moaning each time from the slow fucking. 

Mingyu trails kisses on your neck, sucking the area around your pack mark though never touching the sacred spot. His hips don’t stop when he sucks the lobe of your ear into his mouth. “Do you want to take my knot, Y/N?” A sharp thrust follows his words. “You’ll feel so good, baby. Stuffed full of my cum and taking my knot. Would you like that?” Your head is too muddled to respond, blinking at all the sensations assaulting your mind. Mingyu’s lips spreads gentle kisses and his words are soft as they’re whispered to you. His thrusts slows until he stills completely, opting to start grinding against you. “You’ll feel so good, baby.” 

The promise seems to pull you back to reality. The feeling of Mingyu’s large cock in you leaves no room for thinking. You nod weakly, hiding your face in your arms. “Please be gentle,” you whisper, raising your ass to meet his hips as you press your face against the covers. 

The sight is endearing, the male whispering a promise in your ear before kissing your neck. Mingyu moans softly, murmuring a quiet  _ thank you _ before he’s settling back into a fast pace. The sound of Mingyu's thrust fills the room along with your moans. It doesn’t take long before Mingyu reaches his high, driving his cock deeper into you and painting your walls with heavy spurts of his cum. 

The familiar feeling of being stuffed full makes you grunt, body shuddering at the growing size being shoved into your quivering pussy. You take gulps of oxygen as Mingyu’s knot swells and locks himself inside you. “Hurts,” you whimper helplessly, scratching the surface under you in an attempt to crawl away but the movements drawls a pained whine from your throat.

“It’s okay, calm down. Don’t focus on the pain, Y/N. Just listen to my voice.” Mingyu coos softly, whispering soft words of praises and the pain dissipates until it’s replaced by the satisfactory thought of being knotted by your alpha.  _ “Fuck, _ you’re being so good to me. Being so good to your alpha. You were  _ made _ for me, Y/N. Made for us. Our perfect little mate-  _ mnh-  _ f- fuck,” he moans, breathing heavily when you seem to tighten with each words despite being stuffed full.

You have half the mind to look at the bed next to you, just in time to watch Seungkwan coming in Joshua’s mouth and the latter swallowing as if in a daze. The younger beta sighs softly, patting Joshua’s head and it makes the omega purr, rubbing his face to Seungkwan’s palm. 

For some reason the sight… makes your stomach burn again… or rather, the fire never fully diminished. “Shua,” you call out, placing your cheek on the bed as Joshua turns to look at you. “You haven’t... “ you trail, face contorting in pain when the fire bursts back alive. “Can you.. pl- please come in my mouth,” you say instead.

The omega’s mouth opens in surprise and the cock inside you twitches excitedly. You moan at the feeling, lifting yourself up and attempting to crawl to your lead omega. Mingyu’s knot still ties you to him so you can’t move further in the bed you’re on. The distance makes you whine, reaching out to Joshua helplessly while the omega is still blinking in shock.

Seungkwan gently guides the oldest to you. He undoes the buttons of Joshua’s pants and lets you pull it down when you’re close enough. Joshua’s cock is painfully hard, trails of precum already oozing from the tip and he moans when you swipe your thumb over his tip.

“It’s okay, hyung. Let noona take care of you,” Seungkwan whispers in the omega’s ears, kissing the skin there and pushing Joshua closer to you. You struggle to pull Joshua upwards from his spot on the floor. Quiet huffs leaves your mouth from the restraint of getting closer to the omega who’s still dumbfounded by your request.

Mingyu steadies you by his hold on your hips while Joshua lifts himself by the knees. You’re dangling from the bed, arms holding yourself up by the floor and your lower half still stuck to Mingyu. It’s a bit of a struggle but you manage to lick the head of Joshua’s dick before taking his tip into your mouth. 

Joshua jumps at the sudden warmth, biting his lips and tangling his fingers in your hair. He’s grip on you is tight and you moan around his cock at the slight pain. The vibrations of your throat makes Joshua moan when you take him in deeper and he eases his grip on you, apologising quietly. You hum, the feeling of fatigue washing over your body. The fire slowly dies in your stomach, the suppressants finally kicking in but you’re determined to make your lead omega come down your throat. 

There’s a sudden release of pressure inside you and you moan, gasping at the feeling of Mingyu’s knot deflating and letting the mixture of warm cum and slick slowly trickle down your thigh when Mingyu gently pulls away. You whine at the sudden emptiness, blinking when Mingyu is pulling you away from Joshua and onto the bed. 

The alpha’s warmth leaves you as well after you’re placed in the middle of the bed. You’re too deep in the afterglows of your heat when Seungkwan settles in front of you. He kisses your lips softly, lifting you up so you’re kneeling on the bed. “Let me clean you up,” he murmurs, laying down on the bed and pulling you on top of him so you straddle his chest. 

A rush of heat settles in your face, colouring the skin a darker hue of red; showcasing your embarrassment. Seungkwan’s hands circle around your thighs to keep your legs open and to nudge you forward so your dripping cunt is directly above the male beta’s awaiting mouth. He doesn’t waste a second before devouring your pussy hungrily, as if starved for days and you were his salvation. 

Seungkwan’s mouth works wonders. He sucks the potent seeds of Mingyu’s cum into his mouth mixed with the wetness of your orgasm, humming delightfully as if tasting sweet elixir. The vibrations of his voice has you bucking forward, losing all strength and you desperately move away; afraid of crushing the male under you. “Fuck- Kwannie, w- wait!” He does anything but that. 

Normally someone who does everything at your beck and call, this time, he drives forward. Full intent of ‘cleaning’ you and allowing the crippling desire of greed take hold of his heart as it always does when concerning you. Your thighs are clenching around his head but Seungkwan merely holds you open by the arms encircled around your supple thighs, pulling you harder against his hungry mouth ready to devour every part you offer to him. 

Your pants and moans are accompanied by Joshua’s silent whines. The omega settles in front of you, positions similar, with Mingyu under him and in a state of mind similar to that of Seungkwan. Mingyu sucks greedily at his omega’s hole, teasing the underside of his balls and moving back to the hole steadily gushing slick. 

It’s a wonder how the four of you fit, though barely, on the bed. By no means is it exactly small but with four fully grown adults on a single queen-sized bed is impressive in itself. 

Your hands are moving towards Joshua’s face, enthralled by the blissed expression on his face, and your fingers cup the skin of his cheeks. His eyes snap open to stare at yours and you both lean forward, pulling the other and meeting in a desperate kiss. It’s messy with moans spilled in between and teeth clashing. Joshua’s tongue tangles with yours and he allows you to explore the cravens of his mouth with your tongue. 

Seungkwan managed to suck every single drop of Mingyu’s release inside you but he’s determined to taste your own. His tongue licks and prods at your entrance, sucking on your clit and mouthing at your core. The beta moans loudly, letting the vibrations stimulate your already sensitive nerves and you shudder violently when a crippling orgasm ripples through your body. The sound Seungkwan lets out is sinful. A loud, appreciative moan as if he’s thankful to be able to taste you. 

Mingyu is relentless in his devourings as he is in fucking. He doesn’t stop the continuous assaults his mouth and tongue delivers to Joshua’s puckered hole. The alpha’s fingers wrap around the older’s cock, tugging it closer to him as he moves up slightly. His legs are dangling down the bed, holding his body up as he pushes forward to reach the head of Joshua’s cock. The omega lurches forward, crashing into you and he lets out a small apology before a loud gasp rips from his throat when Mingyu devours his cock.

The young alpha licks long stripes from the omega’s balls up to his tip, using his hands to maneuver Joshua’s cock easily. He sucks messily, drool spilling from his mouth and taking cock as if second nature. Mingyu’s nose is pressed to the neat, trims of hair at Joshua’s base and you watch, amazed, as Mingyu lets Joshua use his throat as a cockwarmer. 

There’s a loud sob that rips through Joshua’s lungs, his body trembling violently and you think he’s cumming when Mingyu’s throat constricts to swallow the load he’s given. Joshua, spent and overstimulated, slowly pushes himself off of Mingyu who manages to kiss the older’s tip. Joshua hisses, swatting at the alpha but Mingyu laughs, getting up from the bed and sitting on the edge properly. 

He turns to look at you whose face is still flushed and in a daze. Seungkwan had managed to slip away from you and slid a shirt over your head as you were staring at the two in front so you’re already decently covered. Your bottom is left bare for Seungkwan to clean with a wet towel between your legs. Your face is flushed endearingly, allowing Seungkwan to move you up the headboard and spreading your legs to clean you properly. You twitch away from the touch before relaxing, allowing the younger male to wipe any remains of cum or slick. 

Mingyu grabs his shirt from the floor, already clad in sweatpants as he grabs a spare towel to start cleaning Joshua who seems to be deep in thought. The omega lets Mingyu clean him, changing his shirt that’s covered in semen and sliding on a pair of shorts. Joshua pats Mingyu’s head appreciatively and the latter kisses Joshua with a bright grin. 

Your heat is slowly, but surely subsiding. You think it’s the combination of being knotted and also the suppressants taking affect. This time your body seems to be taking more damage than before. It’s no wonder, really. A beta can’t take the knot of an alpha, especially multiple knots in such a short time. You think the after effect lasts more harm than benefit. 

“Are you okay, Y/N?” Joshua asks softly, cradling your face in his hands and rubbing his finger behind your ears. 

You’re not sure how to reply so you shrug for a moment before shaking your head. “I can’t take any more knots than this, Joshua. My body’s becoming sore all over and this heat is causing more damage than actually making me bond with the pack.” There’s a deep frown on your face and Joshua eases the strain on your lips with his thumb.

He sighs softly, looking back at Mingyu who’s trying to clean Seungkwan but the beta is bristling angrily at the alpha, though not refusing his touches. “I know, baby. I don’t.. I’m not familiar with the type of heat you’re going through and Seokmin’s trying to figure it out- but.. I have to apologise,” he takes your hands, leveling his eyes so you only focus on him. “I was the one who suggested Seungcheol to.. knot you as many times as it takes to break your heat. It’s not my best decision- I’m sorry for that. But if it means you’ll be a little more sober after that then I…”

His voice dies down until he’s silent, not finishing his sentence but you feel like you know his regret and worry over your predicament and why he made that decision. But you don’t understand. “Are suppressants not good?” You manage to croak, voice horribly dry for some reason. 

Joshua sits next to you, leaning his head on the headboard behind him. “I can’t say. The ones you took didn’t take full effect until Mingyu was with you and.. you know suppressants themselves aren’t exactly good for anyone. We’re not sure how long this heat will last and putting you on prolonged suppressants won’t be good for your body. There aren't a lot of beta types either so we can’t be too sure which ones will help.” 

Mingyu is tapping your leg before you could ask Joshua anything more (though you were still trying to digest his explanation…) and your eyes snap to Seungkwan standing behind the alpha, clothes suspiciously disheveled than it previously was. “Wonwoo-hyung called earlier to ask about you.” Mingyu informs. “He… wanted to ask what happened while you were in the elevator. Any scents or distinguishing features you could name. It’s not clear from the security cameras.” You nod, not saying anything else and Mingyu takes that as your acceptance. 

Seungkwan watches the exchange quietly, staring at you and he opens his mouth once you look at him. “Hansol bought suppressants.” He says simply and you blink at the sudden news.

“What?” Joshua seethes, livid, and Mingyu had to hold his arm in fear of the lead omega jumping on the younger beta. “When the fuck did he—  _ no. _ I’m not letting Y/N take any of those.” The omega hisses and Seungkwan grimaces.

“We’ve been through heats before, hyung. It’s different for betas so we would know,” Seungkwan explains and his face flashes in worry before he’s composing himself. “It’s nothing long term. And noona would only need them for only a week- maybe even less than that. Just to help ease her heat.” 

Joshua’s shaking his head, worry devouring his features and he switches to looking back and forth between you and Seungkwan. “That’s the point, Kwannie. We  _ don’t _ know how long this heat will last. Beta suppressants aren’t reliable. No suppressants are. Today was the only amount I’m tolerating,” Joshua orders firmly and you feel the pinpricks of confusion and frustrations gripping your heart.

“I can’t exactly be knotted everytime I go into heat even if I want to, Joshua. I’m a  _ beta _ and  _ nothing _ will change that. I’m not built to take knots like omegas are— you know this!” Your voice echoes its frustrations and you blink in surprise at the intensity of it. You apologise quickly, eyes prickling with tears at the thought of snapping at your lead omega.

Joshua doesn’t really retort. His face doesn’t hold any anger like you expected—he just seemed sad. “I know,” he breathes softly, tucking a stray hair behind your ears. “I’m just worried. You’re not.. in the best mental state right now. And with this whole thing happening at home and being harassed at work- it makes me worry. We could lose you, Y/N. We don’t want that.”

You blink at his words. The beta inside you is swooned by his words, absolutely happy to be given so much care and attention but you’re perplexed. “How could you lose me over something like this? If I’ve been given those shots for a long time now then shouldn’t something like this have happened before?”

No one replies to your inquiries. Avoiding eye contact or pretending to not have heard you. It’s Joshua again who gives you a small smile. “Not.. something like this. You’ve never gone through heats worse than stress heat. You’re… resisting something,” the omega’s voice twists in distaste, as if the words he uttered are absolutely distasteful in his mouth. “You should get some rest for the time being. Wonwoo will be with you tomorrow.”

Seungkwan takes your hand gently, pulling you by the arm and out of the room where Mingyu stays with Joshua, giving you a small smile. “I’ll tell Hansol to give you the suppressants later,” Seungkwan assures and you nod, somehow a bit numb from… everything. “Get better soon, noona.” 

The inside of your room is dark and empty. As it should be since you were its only occupant but… it feels horribly lonely for some reason. Joshua never answered about the trips, your mind whispers. The thoughts are only just that. Trying to piece together information to make sense of a puzzle seemingly impossible to complete. There are too many pieces to find and too little information to take. 

You collapse on the bed, groaning loudly and thrashing a bit as to throw a mini tantrum. It helps let go of the anger in your system and you relax against your bed, closing your eyes and focusing on sleep. 

The loud ringing of your phone shatters your focus.

_ What the actual  _ fuck _ type of timing. _

A loud groan leaves your lips but you accept the call anyway, putting it on speaker and throwing the device away from you so you can suffocate yourself in your pillows. 

_ “Y/N?” _ Wonwoo’s voice is tentative, somehow sensing your sour mood through the phone.  _ “Where are you right now? Are you alright?” _

You lift yourself from your attempted suffocation, biting the pillow case to hold in the scream of frustration climbing your throat. “Just fine. Had an argument with Jisoo. Is there anything you need, Wonu? If it’s about the elevator thing, can it wait until tomorrow? I’m really tired.” 

The other end is silent for a moment and you would have thought the alpha had already hung up if not for speaking up.  _ “Right. Sorry. It’s not really about that, though. He’s… It’s taken care of.” _ Your brows furrow at his words. Grabbing your phone, you undo the speakers volume and press the device to your ears for more privacy.

“What do you mean?

It’s silent again and you call out Wonwoo’s name in slight worry. There’s a dark feeling crawling up your spine, goosebumps rising on your arms as you wait for Wonwoo to speak. 

_ “I’m not allowed to say. I’ll see you later, Y/N.” _ The call ends after that, continuous beeps replacing the static voice of Wonwoo over the phone as he hangs up. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> next chapter will have more plot (i say to myself but my brain is too horny when it comes to this au)  
> no.. i promise there definitely will be development ;;  
> and next chap will have... wonu? will he help with the next heat? or... （・□・；）


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You take another deep breath, straightening your back and the beta staring back at you looks calmer, eyes void of any distress. You walk out without another glance at your reflection.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you so much for sticking around up till now ( ꒦ິ _ ꒦ິ)
> 
> the tags has been updated so i hope you'll know your limit in this story in case they make you uncomfortable!! thank you for all the support you've shown and i hope you'll enjoy this chapter ( ╥﹏╥) ノ

_ “A male alpha in his mid-twenties suspected to be part of a suicide murder case. The alpha by the name Kim Yongju was found dead in his apartment by the landlord after neighbours had reported smelling a foul smell in the vents. Police are still trying to solve the case, though it is unclear if the cause of death is from suicide or perhaps, mur—” _

The video shuts down with a small click of the power button. You throw the phone away in a sad attempt to muffle any more dreading news. After the call with Wonwoo, your mind wouldn’t let you rest. The silence of the room pushing you further into dark thoughts and crippling anxiety. 

After some time, you had opened your phone again, clicking on the newsfeed and you didn’t have to search for anything. It was in every headline of all the articles in the tab.

_ Male alpha found dead. _

_ Midnight murders. _

_ Streets of Seoul roaming with a killer? _

_Suicide_ _ case in Seoul apartment. _

_ Suicide? Or Murder? _

You clicked on one of the articles against your better judgement. A video attached to the page with news headlines concerning the… case. The picture of the alpha at the corner of the screen as the reporter speaks is familiar. You have no doubt, a sinking feeling in your stomach, he’s the one from the elevator.

Fuck.

You don’t know what this means. He’s dead. Someone you had been looking for all this time. It can’t be a coincidence, the timing would be too perfect. You think back to the bitter scent of suppressed anger in that small elevator. He held his emotions back pretty well so it never occurred to you he would attack you out of the blue. 

No… attacking you would give him too much credit. He seemed… scared for some reason. There are images of his face flashing in your mind now. All showing nothing but the unmistakable features of a scared man. As if his life was in danger. Had he stopped you to ask for help?  _ Would  _ you have been able to help? 

You wouldn’t. 

You don’t know. 

Your head is pounding with too many thoughts. The phone you’re holding slips from your hands, clattering to the ground when you feel a weight pulling your body down; as if gravity increased and is pulling you under. Your eyes are becoming hazy, eyelids closing involuntarily. There's a small jiggle of the doorknob before you succumb to darkness. 

  
  


* * *

  
  


You wake up with a gasp. It follows after with a coughing fit and you wheeze helplessly when your chest is constricting painfully. Your throat burns with each cough, tears springing to your eyes.

“Here,” a glass of water is offered to you and you down it without a second thought. “You should slow down a bit,” the voice is strained and you glance to see Vernon looking at you with a small frown. 

The glass is soon empty after three to four mouthfuls, Vernon looking quite impressed, and you give him a sheepish smile. “Sorry,” you laugh lightly, handing him back the glass. Once gathering your bearings, you tilt your head to the side as you inspect the male. “What’re you doing here so late?” The question why you were suddenly out cold also sits on your tongue but you’re not sure how to ask him such things. 

Vernon looks at you skeptically. Placing your empty glass on your bedside table. “I wanted to give you the suppressants last night but you were already knocked out,” he explains, sitting back on the bed. “Also, it’s not… night right now? It’s like nine in the morning.” 

“I..? Wait- it’s morning?” You stutter, a quick look to the curtains spills the dark bindings in bright colours, evident of the morning sun beyond the dark material. “I was asleep for  _ that _ long? I wasn’t even tired yet,” The younger beta pats your knee comfortingly, not really saying much as you try to understand your predicament leading up to this. You seem to give up and a small sigh leaves your lips. “Anyway. Suppressants?” You opt to ask instead, a hopeful look in your eyes. 

A small bag is placed near your legs on the bed. You inspect the insides of it only to raise your brows questioningly at the variety of medicine in it. “I managed to get different types just in case. The lighter ones are the small pills and the heavy duty stuff are the shots,” he explains, pointing to the syringe wrapped in clear plastic with spare needles by its side. There’s also a small bottle of clear liquid at the bottom of the bag. “Seokmin-hyung said not to take the shot unless… it’s an emergency.” He paused before ending it with that. 

“Right,” you nod. Zipping the small bag, you place it on the floor next to your bed, opting to study its contents at a later time. You turn to Vernon again with a small smile. “Is Shua…” you trail, glancing at the clock. “Is he at work?” 

The younger beta scratches his head lightly, looking back to your slightly ajar door. “He wasn’t home when I came back. I don’t think he’s at the hospital though.” 

You nod, patting your bed and scooting over. Vernon takes your offer with a smile, climbing on to the bed and scooting closer to you, getting under the covers. You cuddle up next to him, taking in his soft scent. It’s grounding and makes you blink for a moment. As familiar as it is, you can’t help but pick up the stench of something… off. You press your nose against Vernon’s shoulder to take another whiff.

“Did you…?” You trail, pausing to take another sniff and your face grimaces in distaste once you notice the foul smell similar to that of heavy miasma. “Where did you go yesterday?” You ask instead. The smell itself isn’t coming from the younger beta so you’re sure he’s not the one emitting such a smell.

Vernon blinks, grabbing the material of his shirt to take a whiff. You watch his expression blank for a moment before he’s furrowing his brows. “The suppressants were from an area not so popular with sanitation. It’s not shady but it’s not all that popular either.”

You gape at him, taking a quick glance at the small bag on the floor. “Why would you buy something from there? What if the neighbourhood wasn’t safe? Or someone tried to sell you drugs or something?” You scold, pinching his arms and he recoils with a pout.

“I don’t exactly mind going through the lengths to get you what you want. ‘Sides, nothing life changing happened. I needed to get something for a friend there, anyways so it was a win-win situation.”

You frown, pinching his arm again and he yelps. You don’t say anything else though. “Just this once.” You warn, rubbing the spot you pinched to ease the pain.

“Right. I already told Seungcheol-hyung beforehand, so don’t worry too much,” he agrees easily, providing you with a key information that makes your shoulders relax slightly. “But more importantly, Seungkwan said that… your heat is somehow worse than yesterday?”

You don’t know how to reply. You can’t exactly be the judge of that despite experiencing it yourself. You’re also not sure how to.. judge if a heat is worse than previously. You’ve never experienced something like this before so you can’t compare it to anything else. “Seokmin’s at work, right?” The younger beta doesn’t comment on your change of subject. He nods, pulling you so you lay next to him again.

“He’s… working. I can’t say if it’s his regular job or if he’s looking in on your condition. Maybe both,” Vernon concludes. 

You nod, tilting your head on the younger’s chest and tracing small patterns on his shirt. “Can I ask you something?” You receive a hum in return and you pause to think of the right wording. “In my phone there’s… a bunch of photos I noticed,” You pause, looking up at Hansol to see if he’s listening. He nods, urging you to continue. “Aside from work related ones, each month there’s photos of us, everyone on the pack, in some place I can’t recognize or remember.” You sigh, growing frustrated at the blank spots your memory provides when recalling the pictures. “So I was wondering. Do you know why we go somewhere each month?”

Hansol doesn’t respond for a moment. You can hear the gears turning in his head and you wait for him to answer. “They’re business trips,” he pauses. “I think.” 

_ What. _

The revelation makes you more frustrated than you hoped. It doesn’t really answer your questions. Why would almost every pack member go somewhere just for a business trip. And each month. If only a couple of members went at a time it would make sense; everyone working in different fields with different demands but the pictures look more like a getaway than it does business trip.

Hansol seems to sense your growing apprehension and he chuckles lightly, thumbing the creases on your forehead to ease its tension. “It’s weird, yeah, and you must be confused why everyone had to go on a single business trip each time everything pops up, right?” You don’t reply but the answer is already obvious. “I don’t really know the whole reasoning but it’s like,” he trails, hands making gestures in front of him. His expression shifts, as if just realising something. “Ah, actually, now that I think about it, it was mostly Cheol-hyung’s business trip? He wanted to introduce his pack in territory meetings.”

That’s a bit strange, you think, though not exactly unnecessary. You just didn’t think territory meetings were still a thing. Meetings concerning territory divisions are mostly held for High Ranking alphas who works in a successful industry with many branches for their business. Seeing as your pack alpha is not only an alpha born into high ranks, but also a CEO of a well known company, territory meetings would be necessary to determine which areas are for Seungcheol’s company exclusively and which areas are prohibited to avoid potential business clashes with other high ranking alphas.

“How come.. Seungcheol only did territory meetings this year? His company was around even from years ago, right?” You question the first few thoughts swirling in your head.

Hansol shrugs, tilting his head a bit in thought. “Even if it was around from back then, Cheol-hyung only became Company President like.. three years ago? He had to rebuild everything starting from there since the previous business was held by hyung’s father. Something like proving hyung’s able to hold everything together once he’s in power and when the company started growing more and more, he was invited to stake claims in certain areas during the territory meetings.”

A pause.

“That’s when hyung also decided to introduce the pack. And meetings like these don’t exactly end after a couple of visits. We had to go to each territory and repeat the claims, introduction, everything. It was kinda hectic.” He sighs, pausing a bit to let the information sink in. “But it’s good you don’t remember everything that well.” 

You’re not able to ask what he means by that before a phone buzzes loudly. Hansol apologises sheepishly, telling you he has to go somewhere and you nod, a bit dumbfounded, and the younger male leaves you after pressing a quick peck to your lips. You watch the door close behind him, staring at the door as if someone else would walk through it before you sigh, collapsing back on your back. 

For some reason, taking in too much information at the same time can cause quite the damage because you feel your head beginning to ache the longer you think of all the things you’ve been told for the past few days.

Knowing the pack for more than four years despite not remembering anything.

Going into a type of heat where being knotted seems to be the only option despite being a beta.

Being told about business trips for important meetings such as territory meetings despite only finding evidence from pictures saved on your phone.

Having dreams—memories, flashbacks you can’t even recognize.

It’s too much yet too little for you to understand. 

You can’t tell if discovering the answers is far worse than not knowing anything at all. You feel like you’re prying into pandora’s box; a salvation that can only be paid with your life.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


A squeezing feeling in your stomach makes your grimace, your body reflectively holding in whatever bile rising up your throat despite there being none. Your beta is whimpering and crying out pathetically, fear gripping it’s existence for disobeying a silent rule; Never go out without permission. 

You had managed to leave the apartment undetected. One of the few instances where there were no other residents nearby and something is desperately telling you to take matters into your own hands. It’s near the evening, the sky darker than usual and you fear the sun would already set by the time you come back. It would entail a punishment without doubt. 

Taking a deep breath, you steel your resolve. You can’t possibly back down now. 

The hospital doors open automatically to let you in, the smell of antiseptic and lingering scents of other patients and visitors assaulting your nose. You let your legs guide you forward, already familiar with the routine but being cautious as to not draw unwanted attention.

You’re at the front of the reception soon enough, not many people present so it’s relatively empty during this hour. You wait patiently until the nurse in front of you is finished typing something into her computer and you offer a small smile when she turns to you. “I’m here to make an appointment.” 

The girl in front of you is young. A pretty omega with a pretty smile as she looks at you, recognition in her eyes. She greets you warmly before her face turns apologetic. “I’m sorry, Dr. Hong isn’t in today. Would you like to schedule an appointment when he’s here?”

There’s a strike of dread rushing through your spine. You don’t think you manage to hide the fear in your eyes as you shake your head, almost too frantically. “Th- that’s fine,” you bite your lip, composing yourself. “I’d like something quick- just for a diagnosis. Anyone’s fine.” Your chest is moving up and down at a rushed pace as you suck in oxygen, trying to keep sane. You think anyone close enough can hear the rapid way your heart is beating against your ribcage.

The nurse in front of you doesn’t comment on your behaviour though her smile disappears before returning again. “Of course,” she hands you a slip of paper. “Sign here, please. Your registration ID is Choi Y/N, correct?” She types something on her keyboard. 

You glance to the side, as if hearing the name will call out it’s owner. “I, um, please register me as L/N Y/N this time,” you lean down, words hushed as if the very sentence would kill you for being uttered. 

You feel like it will.

The omega doesn’t hide her baffle this time. Mouth going agape but she nods quickly, typing in your name and offering you a tight lipped smile. “You’re all set then. Dr. Park will be with you today. Have a nice day, Miss Y/N.” 

You whisper a small thank you before taking the slip of paper she offers you. Without a moment to spare, you scutter away to the bathroom. The doors open with a slam and you wince at the loud noise, not stopping until you’re in one of the stalls. 

You’re breathing heavily, realisation dawning in on you at what you’re doing. You’re sneaking around. In your lead omega’s hospital. Without telling your pack members of where you are despite the silent order to rest. 

Your chest is constricting painfully, not fond with the thought of going to such lengths to hide something from your pack. Your head is pounding, palms clammy with sweat; you feel like you’ll throw up despite not remembering to eat today.

Taking deep breaths to calm yourself, you flush the toilet before stepping out. You wash your hands, splashing your face and cleaning yourself up a bit. The mirror in front of you is clear and well polished. There’s a disheveled looking beta staring back at you with a clear sign of distress on her face and it makes you afraid your scent is similar to that look of fear in her eyes.

You take another deep breath, straightening your back and the beta staring back at you looks calmer, eyes void of any distress. You walk out without another glance at your reflection.

It doesn’t take long for your number to be called. You enter a room farther from where you normally go—Joshua’s office—and the doctor inside greets you with a polite smile. You bow slightly, taking a seat in front of his desk. “What can I help you with today, Miss L/N?” The beta starts with a smile.

You offer one of your own albeit a bit stiff. “I wanted to ask if you can diagnose something for me? I’ve been.. going through these heats lately and they’re not stress heats. They don’t seem to break despite already going through the steps necessary to break a normal heat either.” You stop at that, unsure how else to describe your predicament but the doctor in front of you nods his head in understanding.

“I suppose I’ve heard of that type of heat before,” he murmurs, taking out a file from his desk and flipping through its contents. “Are you currently on any type of medication, Miss L/N?”

You hesitate for a bit before nodding. “Yes..” Even you can hear the doubt in your voice.

He doesn’t say anything, nodding his head as his eyes skim the papers on the file. You resist the urge to look at what he’s reading, instead looking at your hands clutching your fingers together, trying to stop any form of trembling. 

“Well I can assure you that it's not anything long-termed,” The beta starts, closing the file to face you properly. “I can only assume because these types of heats are mostly triggered by a prolonged use of medication. I suppose the treatments you’re undergoing may be the cause of these types of heats. Are you aware of the types of medicine you’re given?”

There’s a forming lump in your throat, eyes blinking a bit in confusion. “I’m not.. aware of what they are. My, um, my pack members are the one providing them for me.” The beta in front of you doesn’t comment, nodding his head slowly. “I’m not on them ever since the heats started.” You add though you weren’t exactly sure yourself. Seungcheol had said the pack would give you regular shots when you start acting up but how regular, you weren’t sure.

“Alright then. I suggest you not take them for the time being. The heats are mostly an automatic response, something your body will undergo in accordance to the medicine you’re given.” The beta, pauses, glancing at the closed file before continuing slowly. “Like I said before, it’s only an assumption but I believe the medicine you’re given increases hormones and sex drive.”

“Like an aphrodisiac?” 

You receive a small smile in response. “Not necessarily. There are some drugs that increase those categories. It’s similar to sleeping aids; something that may help with insomnias but long-term use of them will cause a form of memory loss. The medication you’re on may be good for you, but long-term use will cause damage to a certain extent.”

You nod, unsure what else to say or ask. “I suppose that’s all I wanted to ask,” You smile wryly, a bit forced. “Um, if you don’t mind, does that file contain patient documents for something similar to what going through?” 

The beta pats the aforementioned documents you were pointing at and shakes his head. “That would be Dr. Hong’s journal. Your diagnosis fits the descriptions in his file. I only told you based on what Dr. Hong had written.”

There’s a static sound ringing in your ears as your mind blanks. Joshua knows. He knew what type of heats you were going through and told you he didn’t know. That means he.. lied to you? Why? You can’t think.

There’s an ugly knot tying your chest. Your lungs are restricted, no air coming in. You don’t think you’ve ever felt this feeling of… betrayal so strongly before. No. You just never thought it was possible. Something like this—a lie cutting deeper than death, hurting more than life. This  _ hurt _ came from someone you consider the source of your happiness.

There isn’t anyone else you know by the title of  _ Dr. Hong _ in this hospital—Joshua’s hospital. The thought itself makes you sick. 

“Thank you,” you manage to bite out, not forcing yourself to smile to mask the bubbling anger. “I’ll be on my way then.” The beta in front of you nods in understanding, rising to his feet to see you off and you pause before exiting the room, turning slightly to the doctor. “Please don’t inform Dr. Hong of my visit. I wish to keep this news to myself.” And you leave without waiting for a response.

The ringing in your ears is growing louder and louder the longer you walk. You feel—empty. As though your senses are going numb but one wrong press and you’ll absolutely explode. You’re not sure what to say- what to  _ think. _ Seokmin had prescribed every single medicine for you so you can only assume the medicine—the  _ drugs _ that were given to you was from him and Joshua knew how long you’re supposed to take them, how much was good. You feel as though everyone knew what was happening to you except for you.

Your brisk pace of walking comes to an abrupt stop. Eyes widening and any lingering sense of anger vanishes. The cool air of the night sky dies the fire inside you; you don’t even notice when you stepped out of the hospital.

Wonwoo stands in front of you, his frame leaning against the front door of his car. His arms are crossed in front of his chest, eyes staring at you like a predator, waiting for your next move. Any form of verbal inquiry slips from your tongue, your mind unable to question his presence before the alpha takes quick strides over to you. 

“You never said you’d go to the hospital, Y/N,” there’s a lingering form of emotion in his voice you can’t catch. Wonwoo stands in front of you, eyes glancing down at your bag briefly before he’s leaning closer to you. “You didn’t even tell Shua-hyung you’ll pay a visit to his hospital?” His voice sounds mocking than accusing, as though your crimes are spilled bare for anyone to judge.

Your mouth opens and closes idiotically. You don’t know what to say.  _ How did you know I was here?  _ It’s left unsaid as Wonwoo slowly takes hold of your bag. He unzips the small belonging, humming questioningly at the various types of suppressants in the bag. “Let’s go home,” He urges, slowly pushing you to the direction of his car.

Your legs move on their own. Guided by a string Wonwoo’s controlling. Your fingers tremble as you move to open the car door but it’s locked when you try to pull. You blink, pulling again but the door is still locked. “Won—” your breath hitches, body pressed against the cool metal door as Wonwoo pushes you against it. 

His nose nuzzles the skin of your neck and you shiver, visibly trembling. “Is this a form of disobedience. Y/N?” He questions, mouthing the back of your neck. 

“It- it’s not,” you swallow, squirming away from his touch but the alpha presses harder against you, not allowing you to move. “Wonwoo, you’re scaring me,” You plead, ducking your head to avoid his lips.

Wonwoo pulls away after your words, slowly turning you around and caging you between his arms as he traps you against his car. “Me… scaring you?” He smiles, a small scoff leaving his lips. “What’s scary is you not telling us where you’re going, in this kind of situation- where you can go into heat at any type of moment. What if your heat started when you were in public. What then, Y/N?”

You don’t reply but you feel as though Wonwoo doesn’t need one. 

His hands trail down your arm, fingers slipping under your shirt and caressing the skin there, pressing his face against your throat. “This definitely is not about the sex,” he laughs, nibbling on your skin. “But truly, you’re a  _ sin. _ Our pleasure and the air we breathe. How are you so perfect? A beautiful creature. Made only for us,” he sighs, kissing the darkening mark on your skin. 

You’re breathing heavily, pressing yourself further against the car. Your body is pliant as Wonwoo pulls you closer by the waist. “Our salvation, our goddess. What are we but to worship you?” He laughs, kissing your lips and you flinch as he bites your bottom lip, swiping his tongue over the offended skin. “So perfect for us. We couldn’t let you go when we saw you. You were finally so willing- so perfect for us.”

“Wonwoo,” you call out to him, hands pushing at his chest but the alpha doesn’t let go. He seems to be on high the longer he takes in your scent, drugged with a toxic only your existence can give him. You call out his name again, pushing harder but it only manages to create a small distance.

He growls, cupping your cheeks and slamming his lips against yours. “You’re our  _ mate. _ It was only about time we claimed you. Fate would only bring us together- fuck,” he sighs, rubbing your cheeks softly. “The perfect little mate. You’re so good to us, so perfect. We knew that you’ll be the one to mother our pups. You and all the omegas. The  _ perfect _ pack.”

You can’t bring reason to him. Wonwoo seems intoxicated; drowning in something you can’t pull him out of and it makes you panic a bit. “Wonwoo, tell me what’s wrong,” you press, holding onto his arms still cupping your cheeks. His face is a bit flushed but he doesn’t smell like alcohol. Something dawns on you and you tug at his arms, hitting his chest to make him focus. “Give me the suppressants, Wonwoo.” 

The alpha blinks, slowly letting go of you and you take the chance to grab the bag dropped on the ground. Your fingers are shaking as you try to unzip the bag, growing frustrated at the failed attempts just to open it.

Wonwoo’s fingers pry your hands away, unzipping the bag and taking out it’s contents. Some pills fall on the ground, scattering in it’s clear packaging and you watch as Wonwoo takes the syringe. He opens the pack, taking out the needle and hooking them together. The alpha is silent as he does everything, taking the small bottle of clear liquid and extracting it into the syringe. 

You watch, a bit baffled as Wonwoo moves the jacket you’re wearing down your arm, clearing your arm from any hindrance of clothing. His movements are fluid, a clear sign of him going through the steps many times before. It makes you grimace as Wonwoo looks at you blankly. 

His eyes hold no emotion as the tip of the needle penetrates your skin, clear liquid gushing into your body in a numbing pain. The ache lingers until Wonwoo pulls away and Wonwoo caps the needle before putting it in the bag again to discard of later.

Your muscles seem to give out on you that instant. You lean back against the door, Wonwoo now pulling away slightly though still lingering close. You thank him silently, the male responding with a curt nod and his brows furrow; thinking of something. You watch him in silence, waiting for him to say anything but Wonwoo is silent as he turns away from you.

You watch the side of his face, jaw clenching and unclenching. Your voice is small as you call out to him and he hums, though not turning to you. “Do you… did you hear about the alpha who.. who…” You trail, biting your lip. “He’s…” 

_ He’s dead. _

Wonwoo is silent. His back tenses before you watch his shoulder visibly drop, relaxing. He turns to you with a smile and moves closer to you; stalking prey. 

There's a rush of fear taking hold of your body, muscles seizing and straining under any attempts of movement. You look at Wonwoo's eyes, void of any emotion but there's a blooming, almost sinister, smile on his face. His hands are holding on to your underarms, rubbing the stinging spot of your injection but you can't focus on that with the predatory gaze he fixes on you.

"Did you.." you breathe, chest tightening and your body unconsciously coils in on itself.

Wonwoo doesn't let you go.

"Wonwoo, did you—" you try again, breath hitching when the alpha pulls you to him. Your hands push at his chest, trepidation spreading in your being as Wonwoo holds you close. Your question is stuck in your throat as Wonwoo snakes his arms around your back to pull you closer.

_ Did you kill him? _

It's left unsaid but Wonwoo chuckles as if he can read your thoughts. You feel like he can. His hand snakes up the back of your neck, fingers massaging your pack mark. A shock of sharp electricity spreads from where his hand works and Wonwoo kisses the shell of your ear softly. It makes your stomach twist.

"If you had wished for his death," he breathes, laughing softly afterwards. It's as though the words he utters are amusing to him. Something he finds to be rhetorical if it ever concerns you. "I won't hesitate to kill him."

You swallow audibly, squirming in his hold but you feel as though you're stepping on a tiger's leash. One wrong move and it means your unavoidable doom but in Wonwoo's hold, soft and warm, enclosing you in an embrace so gentle and familiar—one wrong move will mean your certain demise, far worse than death.

"How did you.. k- kill him?" Your throat constricts painfully, closing in on you and tears are springing to your eyes as Wonwoo scents you with his smell. It's a silent claim, a warning to those looking at you meaning that you're his. This time, you think, the warning is for you.

He chuckles softly, pulling away to caress your cheek with his fingers. His palm is large and warm against your skin but you think he's burning you with his touch. You can't bring yourself to pull away—that would be a mistake; your certain death. So you let him look at you with eyes full of mirth, the stars reflected in his eyes but just like the galaxy, they're cold and distant.

"Unfortunately,” he laughs, lifting your face to press his lips against yours. You freeze, unsure of what to do as Wonwoo murmurs against your lips, “I didn't kill him." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> haha... *finger guns*


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It’s unnecessary and _unfair._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for all the kudos and comments on the story and even just checking it out!! it makes me really happy and embarrassed somehow that you're all enjoying this so far haha (〃艸〃)

“Let’s go home,”

The words uttered so faintly, you have a hard time to reply.

It wasn’t one command you can refuse so blatantly--you  _ know _ the underlying tone of command he slipped into those very words serves a purpose. You don’t really feel anything after the alpha’s confession. You don’t know what to say, what to ask. Any sort of new revelation would only drive you insane. You know this. But you crave the answers. 

You stare at Wonwoo as he moves closer to his car, intent on getting in and he raises a brow when you don’t move. Your face is twisted almost painfully. As though you’re sporting a wound and the alpha in front of you moves to perhaps soothe you. You move away before you can fully think, Wonwoo blinking when you dodge his touch.

Your chest constricts painfully, when Wonwoo dismisses your behaviour and continues to the driver’s side of the door. You step in front of him, blocking his path and Wonwoo notices the way you keep distance. He doesn't say anything, looking at the way your eyes shift from his to the side; unable to keep eye contact. 

"What did you mean by that?" You demand, reflexively taking a step back when Wonwoo comes closer. He stops when seeing your subtle flinch. "What you said. Why did you say it was unfortunate you weren't the one to kill him," the elaboration was followed with a small scowl on your face, fists clenching in anger but your face doesn't hide the fear in them.

"Just as I said," The alpha starts, trailing off as he studies the way you bite your lip, expectant of his answer. "I didn't kill him. It was unfortunate."

Your face shifts in displeasure, glaring at Wonwoo openly now. The traces of fright in them are gone and replaced with a fiery flame. Wonwoo missed that look. He can’t remember the last time you looked so angry at something. He’s not sure if he’s satisfied when that look is directed at him. 

"That," you press, tugging at your shirt sharply as if to restrain yourself from... doing something irrational. "You wanted to kill him? What the fuck does that mean, Wonwoo? Did you already find him? Did you threaten him?" You fire in rapid succession, growing frustrated at the apathetic look the young alpha is sporting. It's as if he's mocking you even without the slightest hint of emotion. "You know who killed him." You state, glaring at him.

Wonwoo sighs, stepping closer and you don't step back this time. You don't know where the spur of bravery is coming from but you will yourself to calm down when Wonwoo pulls you to him. The position is like before, his hands snake behind your back; hugging you close.

"No to all those questions," he murmurs. “But yes, I found him. He was brought in for questioning and I asked to be the one to interrogate him but it didn’t work out. He was released the same day he was brought in for questions.” You don't know if you should trust him. No. You  _ know _ not to trust him but for some reason, some inexplicable reason that's beyond you, your body relaxes in his hold, nose pressed to his shoulder still clad in the lawyer's work clothes. "The case is ruled to be suicide. He was a patient at a mental hospital two years ago. He's unstable," Wonwoo explains.

You don't say anything else. You're not stupid. It's impossible for you to dismiss the alpha's previous words so simply even after his explanation. Wonwoo's words and behaviours were too alarming to turn a blind eye to.

The alpha seems to sense your displeasure, the faint smell of discontent coming from you is hard to dismiss. So Wonwoo rubs your back softly, smoothing his large palms down your spine and softly rumbling, holding you closer to him.

You make a sound of protest at his attempts of comfort but there's no denying the way your body relaxes immediately at the ministrations. "How did you know I was here?"

You finally manage to ask, voice soft and tired. Your body is gradually losing strength; perhaps the strong suppressant in your system finally calming you down. Wonwoo's arms reposition themselves so he's holding you closer. His hand massaging the back of your neck gently while the other rubs at your side.

"Let's go home first. Unless you want the entire pack to start a search party, of course." Despite the situation, a small smile tugs the corners of your lips.

You don't respond verbally but you nod to his request, letting the alpha push you in the car. The engine roars to life and the bright lights of street lamps blurs down the path as Wonwoo drives you home. 

  
  


* * *

  
  


The apartment, much to your surprise, is empty when you return. No worried alphas coming to your side. No pestering omegas demanding explanations. No anger, frustrations. Nothing. You’re not sure if you preferred the search party in comparison to this absolute silence. 

The word empty itself might be an overstatement. You can hear and smell the other residents in the apartment but you know they must be…. too angry with you to actually make an appearance. It makes you frown despite your initial anger.

“Soonyoung will be sleeping with you tonight.” Wonwoo speaks up. The sudden volume of his voice makes you jump despite being spoken softly. 

You nod your head, not sure how to verbally reply to that but the alpha doesn’t seem to mind your lack of words. He nods, walking closer to you and pulling you by the waist to press his lips against your temple. “Never again. We’ll have a meeting in the morning,” another brief kiss pressed to the lines of your hair and Wonwoo is leaving you alone by the entrance. 

_ Never again. _

The silent translations of  _ never disobey orders again  _ sits heavy in your mind. A part of you feels upset at the unnecessary harsh treatment. You don’t really think they get to act so angry with you when.. when you were kept in the dark like this. It’s unnecessary and  _ unfair. _

A small frustrated sigh leaves your lips before you’re trudging up your room. Sure enough, Soonyoung is inside, sitting on your bed with his laptop next to him. The alpha perks up when hearing you enter and you feel touched when seeing the bright smile he offers you. 

“You’re home! Are you tired? You should go wash up and change first,” he advises, abandoning his previous work to come closer to you. Soonyoung in all his gentleness takes your small bag of suppressants and lays it on your small desk, turning back to you to pull you into a hug and you all but melt in his arms.

You feel the way his muscles tense slightly under your hold, not expecting you to put your weight on him but he holds you all the same. “Are you okay?” He asks softly, smoothing your back in slow up and down motions. His voice is a little hesitant when he asks, “Did you get some bad news at the hospital?”

You blink, sniffing softly and you pull your face away from his shoulder to look at the alpha’s face. “Does.. does the whole pack know I went to the hospital?” 

Soonyoung looks visibly surprised; eyes widening and lips parting slightly. His features relax instantly at your worried expression and the alpha gives you a small smile. “It’s quite hard  _ not _ to know when you’re practically the only girl we have in the pack. Even if that wasn’t the case, Seungcheol would have forced everyone to flip the whole world inside and out just to look for you.”

The statement is… nice in context but you can’t help imagine the lengths they would all go through just to look for a missing pack member. The lines between rationality and desperation would have blurred if it ever comes to that.

Soonyoung nudges your nose with his, rubbing your noses softly together as he looks at the swirling whirlwind of emotions in your eyes. “Your name showed up in the hospital registrations. That’s how Jisoo-hyung knew you were there. Wonwoo insisted on picking you up since he was already heading back and Seungcheol-hyung forced everyone to sleep before you got home.”

It’s silent again as you try to let the information sink in. It was an obvious mistake to use your real name but practically all the workers at the hospital knew who you were and any other hospital had been too far away to go to if you wanted to travel quickly between the hospital and back to the apartment. 

“You used your own name,” Soonyoung states quietly and you blink, staying silent for a moment to take in his words. He doesn’t seem upset but there’s a frown on his lips and his hold on you loosen enough to just his fingers hooking in the waistband of your pants just to stay attached to you.

You bite your lip, unsure what to stay but Soonyoung is looking at you as if waiting for an explanation. “I didn’t want whatever diagnosis I received to go down on my record under Seungcheol’s name.” Even the words itself sounded pathetic in your ears.

Soonyoung doesn’t say anything, fingers tightening their hold on you and eyes staring deep into yours; digging for any secrets you’re trying to hide. “There’s a lot on your mind,” He finally says, pressing his forehead against yours. 

Your eyes flutter close, enjoying the proximity and warmth the alpha radiates. You stay like that for the seconds slowed down into eternity before Soonyoung pulls away with a smile. “Go wash up. Then you can catch up on sleep,” he advises and you nod, though a bit reluctant to pull away from him. 

Soonyoung has always been so kind to you. You weren’t someone to compare anyone to others but you feel as though Soonyoung had always been the most soft and understanding alpha towards you. While the others always have a reign of control over your head (as they should have when being the members who leads the pack whenever the one in command isn’t present), Soonyoung would always be reluctant to voice out commands, preferring to let the others do as they please.

You had mistaken him as a beta when you were introduced to the pack, clinging to Jun’s back as the others welcome you. Which makes another thought of concern occur to you. Was your first meeting really your first? The timeline which you knew and were expected to know of didn’t seem to align in your head. 

“I have a lot of things on my mind,” you confirm, pulling away from Soonyoung to move to your closet. You continue as you take out your nightwear, “My memory isn’t the best lately. The doctor said it’s because of the medicine you’re giving me. And.. Wonwoo said something..” You trail, shaking your head and folding a piece of shorts. “How long have I been given this medicine, Soonyoung?” You ask instead, turning to the alpha.

He smiles, small and a bit sad but you can’t bring yourself to ask him about it. “You went to a lot of stuff before we met you. It’s…. unpleasant. It would only traumatize you if you knew about it.” His words are spoken softly, as if he’s testing the waters and coming up with words that you would be able to accept. “Go wash up. I’ll tell you whatever you need to hear when you get back.” He promises easily, tilting his head to the door to gesture you to clean up.

You bite your bottom lip gently, head nodding in minuscule motions and with one last glance, you leave your room. The walk to the bathroom down the hall is somehow tense. As if the short corridors will close in on you. As if there’s something lurking in the shadows waiting for you. As if you aren’t safe even in the confines of what you call home. 

The thoughts make you speed up, reaching the bathroom and promptly rushing in, locking the door behind you. The bathroom like any other room in the apartment is large, breaking off in different sections of the place as if it was its own living space. 

Your clothes are discarded to the floor, piled together and thrown in the laundry hamper by the corner before you’re under the warm shower. The heat of the water makes you relax, tense muscles melting under the steady pressure. You don’t pay attention to the dry bits of blood chipping away and washed into streams of red down your body. It didn’t even occur to you when exactly Wonwoo had bitten hard enough to draw blood. Maybe when you were faced away from him..

The spot on your arm isn’t throbbing anymore but when you think hard enough, you feel like you can still feel the ache there. Your movements to wash yourself are deliberately slow, taking your time to not think of anything and lying to yourself that nothing’s wrong. It doesn’t work well but you make a conscious effort to push the worries down, deep in the far corners of your mind where you know all and every dark thoughts are waiting to burst through the surface when you’re not able to contain them anymore. 

It takes you several more minutes before you’re turning off the shower with great reluctance. Your skin smelling of soft milky honey from soap and hair wet with the smell of Jihoon. You think you might have grabbed his shampoo bottle by mistake but you can’t bring yourself to be too hung up on it; the smell of his shampoo helps you calm down a bit. 

Drying off and dressing yourself in the outer part of the bathroom takes a short amount of time, your hands moving automatically as your mind is conjuring all the confusion and doubts into questions. Soonyoung did say he would explain some things to you when you get back but you aren’t sure what truths or lies he would slip in during his explanations. 

Your hair is still wet when you slip back into your room; passing down the hall that seemed too dark compared to before and shutting the door behind you with a soft click. Soonyoung is sitting in the middle of your bed now. The laptop shut down and closed is placed on your bedside table. 

The alpha perks up when you enter, a smile on his face as he scoots away from his spot to get under the covers. Soonyoung lifts the blankets, smile urging you to get under it and you laugh, amused at the playful atmosphere he manages to exude despite the circumstances. That’s just how he is, you suppose. Able to melt any tension just with small gestures and smiles. 

You snuggle up next to him without any other promptings and Soonyoung laughs, surprised at the sudden feel of your wet hair on his shirt. “Oh! Sorry, sorry! I sort of forgot about that,” you laugh, sheepish, and you grab a small towel in the bedside drawer you keep whenever you’re too tired to dry your hair properly. 

Soonyoung helps you wrap the small fluffness around your head, letting the towel sit around your hair to soak up any excess water left as you settle next to Soonyoung again. “I can sense the amount of questions you’re holding on to is worth more than Myungho’s camera,” His lips pressed in a thin line, smiling wryly as he assesses the amused look on your face. 

“Nothing is worth more than Minghao’s camera. It’s more expensive than my wage,” you huff, words meant for teasing but you can feel the instant feeling of regret when you spot the small frown on Soonyoung’s lips.

You can already here the question even before the alpha asks: “Is Cheollie not paying you enough?” There’s no helping the sigh leaving your lips.

You shake your head, patting Soonyoung down so you can lay your head on his chest. “It’s not that. I was just kidding- I’m sorry. Seungcheol pays me more than enough. And Junnie slips in bonuses sometimes too,” Your nose scrunches up as you remember the amount Jun had transferred to your account that one time. The word  _ bonus _ far fetched when remembering the exact amount he had transferred.

You prompt your chin on his chest, watching the alpha’s face with an easy smile. Eyes smoothing down his cheeks, the skin sprinkled with soft blemishes and soft freckles. He looks absolutely lovely like this; faint scars and dark circles under his eyes. It’s human. In all his glorious imperfections, unlike the time you feel as though he would rip your throat out. The heavy sound of metal doors being hit ringing in your ears faintly.

Perhaps it had been a silent reminder. Just how kind and understanding your alphas are towards you, it doesn't mean they won’t hesitate to put you in your place. The revelation makes a small shiver rake down your spine, the movement not escaping Soonyoung’s observant gaze.

“Did Wonwoo say something to you?” He inquires softly, though you feel as though his wording is one of statement rather than questioning. Like he  _ knows _ the other alpha had said something. He’s waiting for you to confirm it. You could only manage a small nod.

Soonyoung’s expression melts after that, hands coming up to cup your cheeks and thumb caressing the skin under his fingers. “You’re more fragile than I remember,” he laughs when seeing the glare you send him. “It’s a good thing. You trust us more to let us see this side of you.” He assures, kissing your nose briefly.

You let Soonyoung look at you as if observing a piece of art. The smile on his face seems permanent, his body heat warming you and making your shoulders relax in his hold. “Wonwoo said something about… the alpha in that elevator.” Your voice is soft, hesitant and you pray that Soonyoung doesn’t hear you but he always does; he’ll listen to all the secrets you’ll spill.

“He wasn’t in his right mind, I think,” Soonyoung starts, shifting closer as if he wasn’t close enough. Because it’s never enough. “I’m sure he feels conflicted with what he said. There’s.. something about you. About your scent that drives us crazy. It spikes whenever you’re in heat and I guess we’re lucky you’re a beta and all that.”

Your hand snakes around Soonyoung’s shoulder, falling to the crook of his neck and he shifts his head to press his lips against your arm. You pull him closer. “Did he meet him? The alpha. Was Wonwoo able to meet him before he..”

_ Killed himself. _

“Yes,” Soonyoung answers. He takes your hand from around his neck and places it between you, lacing your fingers together and pressing kisses between your knuckles. “He was brought in for questioning. Yongju was it..? His name. He never explained his behaviour in the elevator despite Wonoo’s promptings and potentially being thrown in jail for attempted assault.”

You let the information sink in, nodding your head and Soonyoung continues to worship your hands. “Mingyu said Wonwoo wanted me to help with the case.” 

Soonyoung nods, eyes closed as his tongue glides across the skin of your fingers, pressing kisses and sucking dark marks over the soft skin. “Wonwoo wanted to see if seeing your face would jog the bastard’s.. Yongju’s memory since he seemed more confused than anything. Like he doesn’t even remember what he did and he…” Soonyoung shakes his head, sighing softly. “He got away with a warning. Wonwoo’s superior said he wasn’t worth the trouble especially since no one got hurt.” There’s something dark lurking in the alpha’s eyes but it flickers away just as you catch glimpses of it.

“Anything else?” He smiles, pulling your arm over his torso so he can hug you closer. 

You stare at the smile on his face. Soft features drowned with fatigue but he’s still trying to comfort you in some ways with soft ministrations or brief explanations. Your hand gives a small squeeze over Soonyoung’s back and his nose scrunches cutely at the action. “We met four years ago. But I only remember meeting you three years ago. After Junnie… after working for Seungcheol’s company. Which.. which part of the story is true? When did we meet?” You bite your lip, anticipating his answer though worried about what exactly you’ll receive.

Soonyoung doesn’t answer you right away. As though he’s still trying to process your words or maybe he didn’t hear you. You’re growing more and more worried by your choice of wording- maybe he didn’t like that. An apology is at the tip of your tongue but Soonyoung tilts his head, pressing his forehead against yours softly. There’s a sad smile on his face.

He sighs heavily, a frown taking over his features and his arms are tightening almost possessively on your waist. “It’s… yeah, we’ve known you for about four- maybe five years now. But you became part of the pack maybe three years ago. After you joined Cheol’s company.” The edges of anger is present in his voice. It’s tethering between the lines of suppressed emotions or bursts of feelings. You’re not sure which you should be more wary of. “Jun brought you to us. I guess that part of your memory is still intact. But the circumstances weren't… good. And yeah, like I said, we met four years ago, by accident really, we were starting out as a newly formed pack back then. Imagine our surprise when you finally showed up and let me tell you,” he laughs, tapping his fingers on your hip.  _ “Everyone, _ not just two or three members, but  _ everyone _ looked like they were in love. It was like we saw love at first sight.” 

There’s a small smile on your face as you listen to him. The smile on Soonyoung’s face is contagious and you find yourself smiling wider when his does too. His story, as novel-esque as it is, makes a small crease form on your brow despite the smile still on your face, now turning more confused though still amused at his story. If they had all seemed to have fallen for you at first meeting then… 

“Yeah,” Soonyoung breathes, fingers now tracing a small stream down your cheek and then back up to repeat the motion. His features are soft and gentle, nothing like the sharp look an alpha would normally possess as he looks at you. Soonyoung bites his lip softly, worry etched on his brow but he’s still trying to smile at you gently. “We went through a destined bond. All of us. It’s like we all instantly knew you would be our fated pair.” 

Despite the words whispered to you like a secret—something Soonyoung holds closer to his heart than any other statement—despite that, you feel the sinking feeling in your stomach once again resurface. Dropping down from the depths of your chest to the lowest parts of your being. You can’t bring yourself to look at his face- to look at the disappointment on his face when you don’t react as you should when hearing something akin to a miracle happen all those years ago. 

A gentle sigh breathed next to your ear, you can feel the way Soonyoung’s warm breath fans across your heating skin as the alpha pulls you closer. “It’s alright,” he assures, as if hearing the silent despair in your head. You feel like crying and screaming because it is  _ not _ alright. It’s perhaps the worst feeling for them to have gone through and you know it’s not your fault but you can’t help but feel as though you’ve crushed their dreams despite not really doing anything. 

“We all came to terms that you didn’t feel anything back then.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm trying to update at least once a week but well inspiration and motivation takes control but i'll try my best to update frequently!! also happy 5 years with svt!! it's amazing we all made it this far and i'm glad i managed to update today of all days haha 
> 
> i hope you'll look forward to the rest of the story!! thank you! <3


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “There’s just- a lot of things on my mind,” you start, already feeling frustrated at just the thoughts running in your head.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Junnie day!! I've returned after exams week and posted today just because fufu
> 
> As the date entails, this chapter is heavily Jun-focused! And I guess this can be classified as a filler haha I hope you'll enjoy!

Your fingers clutch at the back of Junhui’s shirt. You’re sitting behind him between the couch cushions and his back, burying your face in his shoulder as Jun secures your legs around his torso. He’s patting your leg comfortingly, letting you wallow in whatever bad morning atmosphere you’re carrying in the early hours. 

After the talk with Soonyoung, the alpha had encouraged you to fall asleep, securing his palm over your eyes and caressing your eyelids. Despite the worry and fear racing in your head, you allow yourself to relax in the alpha’s hold; falling asleep soon after that. You woke up much earlier than he did and with careful steps, you wiggle out of Soonyoung’s hold, wrapping a cardigan around yourself and trudging down the stairs. 

Stepping down the last flight of stairs, it perhaps took you a full minute to process the sight of Junhui making something in the kitchen; sleep-muddled head trying to wrap around the idea of someone being up so early on a weekend. 

He was making hot chocolate apparently, smiling brightly when realising your company. After the warm goodness is ready to be enjoyed, you all but pull Jun to the couch, scooting back until you're flushed against the cushions and pulling him in front of you to cling to like a koala. 

You have half the mind to remember yesterday’s events—the whole mess that transpired in just the few hours of night and despite being antsy about the other member’s reactions when facing them, there’s something about Jun that makes you want to cling to him and trust your worries to him. 

Your fingers weave together as you circle your arm around his chest, hooking your chin on his shoulder to watch the mug of hot chocolate in the omega’s hands. “Junnie,” you start, earning a drawled out hum from the male, awaiting your next words. You don’t really say anything after that, burying your face in his back again and groaning loudly. 

The laugh that leaves Jun’s lips is melodious and nice to listen to in the wee hours of barely-there-sunlight. “Shitty night?” He teases and you huff, hiding the smile in his back and Jun continues, tone much softer, “How did things go yesterday?” 

The tone he uses is soft—as is everything associated with Wen Junhui. Second oldest omega of the pack. A warm star in the constellations that is your pack and with such a soft, serene atmosphere he’s providing despite all the troubles you’ve caused, voice still gentle and speaking to you as though you’re his definition of love (and you are, your mind tells you), you feel as though your entire world may shift and revolve around him. 

It’s a dangerous thought—a sign of unfaithfulness to your duties as a member of a pack but you can’t help the thoughts crossing through your head in rapid successions, one after another filling your mind. 

You bite your lip gently, shooing the thoughts away as you hook your arms over his shoulders where your hand is bent over his front. “Not so.. good,” nose scrunching you don’t pay attention to the way Jun chuckles at the choice of wording. “There was too much news I had to take in yesterday,” you pause, thinking of the right words and you feel a finger softly tracing patterns over your skin. “I’ve made at least three new discoveries for me.” 

Jun bellows out in full blown laughter this time; not expecting you to switch to a tone of playful complaint from the previous worry in your voice. You pull him back, pouting and chastising him to be careful what with the drink still in his hands. It’s easier like this, you think. No tension or worries—just joking around without a care. It’s become difficult for you to remember the last time you’ve ever had such a playful atmosphere. 

“Well some discoveries can lead to good things.” The omega supplies, patting your hands and taking the last few sips of his hot chocolate. You hadn’t noticed he was close to finishing it. “Tell me the good things you’ve discovered,” he plays along, setting the now empty cup onto the table. His movements drags you with him when he moves to the floor to reach the table and you don’t bother to free him of your weight, deciding to be a bother and cling to him.

Jun huffs, though he doesn’t complain, letting you wrap your limbs around him as he settles the cup (barely) over the edge of the table. Somehow, you find yourself being piggybacked when Jun stands. His hands settle under your thighs, making sure your legs are secured around him as he makes his way to the kitchen.

“What’re you.. What’re you doing?” Dumbfounded, your chin hooks over his shoulder as you watch the male grab a new set of tissues. He walks back to the couch, settling there and gently pries your hands and legs from him. Though confused, you let the male maneuver you away.

Jun settles you back against the couch, strengthening out your legs and fluffing the pillows cushioning your head. He grabs the spare blankets over the couch and splays it over you. You’re safely tucked in when Jun finally settles next to you, squeezing himself on the couch so you’ll both fit when he wraps you in his arms. “Okay, I’m done. Continue on with your story.” He finishes his words by handing you the tissues he picked out. 

A breathless laugh escapes your lips, taken aback though still amused at his actions. You’re cuddled together on the couch under the soft blankets with your legs tangled, Junhui barely hanging on to the edge as he hooks his legs around you to stay put. “I could just lay on top of you, Junnie.” You advise, folding the tissues in a neater pile and settling it over the top of the couch to have access to later. 

“This position is fine,” a pat to your stomach covered under the layers of cotton accents his point. “Just push me off if you want to feel more freedom.” The omega adds, nuzzling the side of your head. 

You cling to him despite the advice, shifting on your side and pulling him closer to a more forgiving position. Junhui lets you hold on to him; arms hooked to round his back and further entangling your legs together. He can hear the silent rumble of gears turning in your head, enjoying the silence though running with distant thoughts. 

Your finger traces a small repetitive pattern on his back, without form and meaning aside a coping mechanism—something to distract yourself with. A small sigh leaves your lips, heavy in your chest and Jun squeezes your sides comfortingly; patiently waiting for you to speak. “There’s just- a lot of things on my mind,” you start, already feeling frustrated at just the thoughts running in your head. “I don’t know where to start. I want to- to feel secure. Like I know what’s happening in my life but lately it’s like,” you huff gesturing with your hands wildly because you’re not sure how to describe your feelings correctly.

A loud groan leaves your lips and Jun rubs his palm over your back, biting his lip to keep himself from talking. He knows you need to let it all out first. “It’s like I have no control over my life. I know no one ever really does—have control over things that is, but it’s like.. like I’m just letting everything and everyone control my life for me and that-” you breath hitches, letting your own words sink in.

“That scares you,” the omega murmurs. “Not having control.” He finishes, rubbing his nose into your neck to comfort.

There’s a bile rising up your throat but you swallow it down. Nodding your head slowly. It feels all too real now that you’ve acknowledged it. “Bad things happen if you’re not in control, Junnie,” the statement can be discarded with a thousand arguments but for you, when all semblance of comfort comes in the form of being able to handle a situation calmly, for things to resolve and settle peacefully, not having control brings too much uncertainty. You almost lost your life because you didn’t have control once. You don’t want to feel that way again. 

“They won’t,” Junhui chimes, peppering the side of your head with soft kisses. “You have an entire pack to help you. To pick up the troubles you’re carrying. If.. if lately it seems like we’re too demanding then I’m sorry. We just want what’s best for the pack and it may seem like we’re disregarding your feelings that way, but we just want to settle things as quickly as possible without too many damages.”

“That’s just it,” you reason, voice weak and only arguing for the sake of it. “Not having my own decisions makes me scared. I’m not weak, Junnie. And I know the pack worries but they’re treating me like an omega. That- that goes against my nature. I’m not an omega. Omegas aren't weak and betas aren’t weak. It’s like the lines of what I am is being blurred because- because of this fucking heat I’m going through!” Your voice rises in volume the longer you speak, growing more and more frustrated to get your point across.

Junhui shushes you softly, fingers carding through your hair in gentle motions. “You’re not. You’re not an omega and you’re not weak but we worry, Y/N. We can’t help it. You’re important to us.” His palm cups the flushed skin of your cheeks firmly, forcing you to look at him. “You’re the only member we met by chance. If we let our guards down for just a second it’ll feel like we’re willing to give you up to some other pack. We can’t do that, Y/N. Not when it concerns you.” 

There’s a lump in your throat as you stare at the almost panicked look in Junhui’s eyes. Brows furrowed and lips tugged in a frown. You find yourself easing the tension from his face, softly rubbing your fingers on the creases on his forehead and Jun relaxes at your touch. You lick your lip, “Can you tell me what that means?” The question is whispered softly. All the fight and aggression leaving your system and Jun smiles, letting go of your face and pulling you closer by the waist. 

“I.. I’m not sure if you remember, but it’s like,” he pauses, a small smile replacing the frown on his face and his eyes fill with an overflowing amount of affection as he looks at you. “What I mean by chance is that the rest of us, we started as a new pack. Childhood friends and all that, meeting through mutuals. Probably two months old at the time and Jeonghan-hyung had to do some business trips. Since our status wasn’t that strong in the hierarchy yet, Cheol-hyung suggested it would be best if everyone stuck close and went on the trip together. To prevent any other high ranking packs to sabotage ours.”

You listen tentatively, wringing your hands in the omega’s shirt to distract yourself as Jun tries to recall the events. “The trip was pretty far. Hyung needed new materials for his next design and it sorta taught me that there’s actually different types of silk in the world. There’s about four by the way,” he adds, laughing breathlessly when you giggle. “The place we went to was a really small town, rural and not heavily populated. That’s where we met you.” Junhui leans closer, rubbing your noses together and grinning at the awestruck look you give him in response.

“Love at first sight. Just like that. It’s rare, you know? Finding your fated pair. Let alone someone so perfect the whole pack felt it. It was like a domino effect. There was an impact, everyone felt it, everyone started to fall,” he pauses, something flickering in his eyes but it’s replaced with an almost solemn look on his face. “And we came crashing down. It- it’s not your fault. We came to terms with it but I guess it just? It still kind of hurts. Knowing that you didn’t feel anything when you saw us. You looked so confused when we approached and it just- Seokmin sorta knew. He told the rest of us that you didn’t feel your bond with us and it—I don’t know, it really hurts.”

Despite sensing the lingering scent of sadness emitting from him, Jun smiles reassuringly, grinning down at you. You don’t know what expression you’re making. “I’m sorry,” you start but Jun shakes his head.

He pouts, brows creasing again as he nudges you. “No.. why are you apologising? Like I said, it’s not your fault.” 

A small sigh leaves your lips, staring down at his collar bones because you can’t bring yourself to look at him. “I know that my reaction couldn’t be helped but it’s like.. Just knowing you all went through that- it’s painful to hear. I can’t imagine what it must have felt to be rejected by your fated pair.” You grimace at the words, something in the back of your mind reminding you that _you_ rejected them. _You_ were the one to reject all of them. The irony...

Rejection is something painful, you think. It kills whatever semblance of hope lingering in someone’s heart but to be rejected by a fated partner is as though being told your entire existence is a lie. That’s why finding fated partners are extremely rare and oftentimes unacknowledged just because the very possibility of rejection could drive someone into madness. 

Junhui’s fingers trace small circles on your cheek, effectively capturing your attention as you turn to him. He’s eyes are smiling as he looks at you. “Don’t think too hard about it. It turned out well didn’t it? You’re ours now. That’s all that matters.”

“Soonyoung said that too.”

The male hums, a small laugh passing through his lips. “And he’s right.”

You nod, not adding anything else and just cuddling closer to Jun. The scent of soft floral fills your lungs, soft and sweet and not too overwhelming. It’s the unmistakable scent of Junhui and it feels enough to make you calm. It takes another moment of silence before you softly poke at Junhui’s sides, gathering his attention. “There’s still a lot on my mind.” You admit sheepishly, smiling into the omega’s neck when he chuckles fondly. 

Pursing your lips, you take a moment to think. Junhui’s answered how you’ve met the pack—the rest of the story leading up to now can be addressed later. You already know why your memory is bad—prolonged use of medication and it also contributes to your recurring heats. You just.. You’re not sure why your pack is taking things a bit too far. Joshua not telling you the whole truth and Wonwoo… you’re not even sure why he acted the way he did—intoxicated by the smell of your heat or not.

“I can’t- my memory is still really fuzzy. I can’t recall anything you’ve told me and I’m not even sure if I’ll go into heat again or not. Joshua- he’s hiding something from me and that alpha from the elevator. It’s a bit odd isn’t it? The timing is a bit- I mean- I don’t know. I’m not sure. Maybe I’m looking too deep into it but Wonwoo’s also been acting strange since last night and I just- I don’t know. I..”

Junhui taps your arm lightly, the soft rhythmic pressure on your skin makes you focus on that instead of the flood of words you’re vomiting all at once. “Okay, okay. Let’s forget about the start first. Try to narrow it down a bit, yeah? Tell me about your hospital trip. Let’s start from there. Why did you suddenly decide to go?” His tone is soothing, demanding nothing from you but still waiting for you to answer. 

Your face scrunches, tugging the blanket up over your shoulder. It’s starting to be a little hot with Jun’s added body heat and the sun rising higher in the sky behind the curtains; the air conditioning does nothing against your skin when you can’t seem to focus on that. “I just.. I guess I wanted a second opinion. Something from someone outside the pack so they wouldn’t filter anything, you know? It’s not like- it’s not like I don’t trust Joshua or Seokmin taking care of my health but they don’t tell me the truth sometimes. I found out that Joshua actually _knows_ what’s happening to me, but he’s not telling me.”

Junhui nods, letting you settle down and making sure you don’t have anything else to add. “I don’t think.. Jisoo-hyung was trying to hide anything. It’s more as though... Ah, you know how some doctors don’t usually tell the patients right away whenever they’re diagnosed with something bad? I think hyung was just trying to dig in a bit more on some things before really being able to tell you everything. Otherwise you might have felt a lot more worse with what’s happening than you do now.”

The blanket over your shoulder is pulled down, realising the hot air trapped underneath and you sink further into the couch once the cool air hits. “I’m not saying what hyung did is fully justified. He could have told you a little bit of detail so you wouldn’t worry yourself too much but if you think about it, with everything that’s happening to you now. Would you have been able to take in any other bad news?”

You think over his words carefully. The fact of what’s happening to you coming from a second party was terrible, let alone if someone close to you would be the bearer of such news. It wouldn’t only pressure you to know the truth. “I’ll ask him some other time, Junnie.” It doesn’t go past him that the meaning behind your words is to end the conversation but Junhui doesn’t comment, nodding his head and sitting up a bit.

“I think you should talk to Seungcheol-hyung,” the omega advises, untangling his legs to place them on the floor. “Talk to our alpha. He’ll have more words to tell you than I ever could.” A soft chuckle leaves his lips; flouty and breathless. “And talk to Wonu. He couldn’t- he didn’t sleep last night. But take your time, yeah? You deserve a break.”

Fondness swells in your chest, reaching out and Jun meets you halfway, lacing your fingers together. He gives you a soft squeeze which you return fully, smiling up at him. Despite the rest, you feel tired but the liberation to your questions is comforting, if not, reassuring coming from your most trusted omega.

“I love you, Junnie.”

The male’s eyes widen slightly, taken aback but a full smile blooms on his face and he laughs, shaking his head and leaning down to kiss you. “I love you too.” He murmurs, lips brushing over yours at the proximity. “We all do. Our existence is only for you.”

You smile, letting the editor pull away to stalk towards the kitchen again. 

There’s no denying the fact now, not with how many times they’ve confirmed it themselves, but your pack, their existence and what they do, despite being their own person, their nature would only drive them towards you: a being which proves they’re existence. Their nature revolves around and only for you. Like a flower that could only exist with sunlight, they’ll wither without you.

And it further blurs the lines they’ll cross just to reach you.


End file.
